My Father-in-Law Spent All His Savings and Now Asks Me and My Husband for Money

I had just gotten married when my in-laws decided to wash their hands of everything and travel all over the place. For the past two years, the couple has been traveling across the country. They’ve been spending their savings like there’s no tomorrow. I’ve told my husband several times to persuade his parents to save some money for their retirement. But my husband always retorts with a gruff voice: “Are you hoping to leech off my parents? Why are you always calculating their money? As their children, of course we’ll take care of them in their old age. Why else would we have kids?” My good intentions were misunderstood. After that, I stopped bringing it up. I figured as long as they had enough money for themselves and didn’t burden us, it would be fine. But I was naive to think the problem would be that simple. With the way my in-laws were spending money, how could their savings be enough? In the living room. “Alex, you know your cousin is getting married this July. I was wondering when your mom could pay back the $7,000 she borrowed from me last year,” Aunt Emma asked bluntly as she placed the candy and gifts she brought on the table. My husband and I were stunned for a moment, looking at each other in confusion. My husband quickly recovered and probed, “Aunt Emma, did Mom borrow money from you privately? I had no idea.” Aunt Emma waved her hand and slowly explained the situation: “Your mom asked me not to tell you when she borrowed the money. She said she was out of cash and needed me to lend her a few thousand dollars. It’s not just me – your Uncle Jack and Aunt Sarah have also lent her money. I wouldn’t be in a rush to ask for it back, but your cousin is getting married, you know? I called your mom, but she said she didn’t have any money and told me to ask you.” My heart sank, and my face fell. It was bad enough that my in-laws had blown through their savings, but they were even borrowing money from relatives. My husband’s face also darkened, and he let out a long sigh: “Aunt Emma, give me your bank account details. I’ll try to gather the money and transfer it to you in the next couple of days.” “Alright, I’ll send you the account information when I get home. I’ll be going now,” Aunt Emma said with a smile, getting up to leave as soon as my husband agreed to repay the money. I tried hard to suppress my anger. I forced a smile as I saw her out. As soon as I closed the door. Furious, I clutched my aching chest and exclaimed: “Honey, what’s wrong with your parents? Isn’t all that money enough for them? They’re even borrowing money from relatives now? I told you earlier to ask them to be more careful with their spending. Look what’s happened now!” My husband’s face was grim too. He snapped: “Enough, stop nagging about this and that. I’ll ask them about it later.” My husband irritably took out a pack of cigarettes and started smoking. Then he called his parents and asked them to come over right away. Whenever it came to matters concerning his parents. My husband couldn’t bear to hear a word against them from me. My temper flared up too, and I didn’t want to stay with him. I went back to our room to take care of the baby. My in-laws have been selfish their entire lives. They’ve never thought about their children. When my husband and I got married, we used money that he had saved from his own work. His parents didn’t contribute a penny. They even made us pay for our own wedding. Later, when we bought a house, my husband used all his savings and borrowed some money from friends to come up with $20,000. My parents also gave us $20,000 to help our little family. I had thought about asking my mother-in-law to lend us some money to reduce our mortgage burden. But she brushed me off, saying she had no money. She even declared harshly: “No one can count on my money.” And now, this is what’s happened… I suddenly felt that the pressure on my husband and me would be enormous in the future. “Quick, quick, Lily, make me something to eat. I’m starving!” My mother-in-law’s voice came from outside. As soon as I walked out, my mother-in-law immediately ordered me to make her food in a bossy tone. I didn’t agree. My husband made tea for his parents and brought it over: “Mom, I called you over today because I need to clarify something. Did you borrow money from Aunt Emma and the others? Aunt Emma came by today saying you borrowed $7,000 from her last year.” Hearing this, my father-in-law nervously looked left and right while holding his cup, not saying a word. My mother-in-law was stunned for a few seconds, then reacted and said matter-of-factly: “Oh my, I had forgotten all about that. Yes, I borrowed $7,000 from your Aunt Emma last year. Mom’s a bit short on cash now, so can you help me pay it back?” My husband asked in disbelief: “Mom, you two have so much in savings, and it’s still not enough for the two of you?” Seeing that her son was angry, my mother-in-law’s eyes darted around, trying to change the subject: “What’s wrong? I’m your own mother. What’s wrong with me spending some money? We do have savings, and we haven’t asked you for money before. You don’t know, but in my group of friends, their sons give them money every month. Look at you!” My husband ignored her attempt to change the subject. I couldn’t hold back: “Well, other parents buy houses and cars for their children! What about you? We’re not asking for your money, but at least don’t drag us down!” But my mother-in-law didn’t take my words seriously: “I’m talking to my son. Why are you butting in? I’m not asking you to pay, am I?” “You…” Just as I was about to argue with my mother-in-law, my husband grabbed my wrist and pulled me back. His eyes were full of disapproval. Although he was also angry about his parents’ behavior. He didn’t approve of me, his daughter-in-law, talking back to his mother. I was furious too, and since he didn’t want me involved, I wouldn’t be. I wrenched my hand free and sat down by myself. My husband rubbed his forehead in frustration, trying to keep his voice calm: “Tell me, Mom, how much money do you actually owe?” My in-laws exchanged a glance. My husband stared at them intently. My mother-in-law hesitated: “A…about $20,000.” “What? You owe that much? Are you spending money or throwing it away? I told you to be more careful with your monthly expenses. $20,000 is my entire year’s salary. Are you trying to work me to death?” Before my mother-in-law could finish, my husband jumped up in anger. He couldn’t help but point at his parents and scold them. “Don’t… don’t be angry. As long as you help pay off these debts, we won’t spend so recklessly in the future,” my mother-in-law promised, cowering a bit, frightened by my husband’s outburst. “Pay it back? Where am I supposed to get that kind of money? I still have to pay the mortgage and car loan every month!” my husband snapped back at his mother in frustration. Then he sat down heavily on the sofa. The living room fell into an awkward silence. Until my mother-in-law turned on me: “Lily, didn’t you have your mom come look after the baby before? You paid her every month, right? Your mom must have some money saved up now. Why don’t you ask her to lend us some?” Last year after I gave birth, I had originally wanted my mother-in-law to help take care of the baby. I was going to give her $500 a month as compensation, but she refused because she was busy traveling. I had no choice but to ask my mom to come after discussing it with my husband. My mom adamantly refused to take any money, but after my repeated insistence. She symbolically took $300 a month. But she often bought things for me and the baby. That money, though given to my mom, mostly ended up back in our pockets. And my mom still tirelessly took care of the child. I clenched my fists, suppressing my emotions: “Mom, I had originally wanted to pay you to look after the baby, but you didn’t want to, so I had to ask my mom to come. My mom didn’t want to take any money, and in the end only symbolically took $300 a month. And with how often she buys things for the family, that money doesn’t even stay in her pocket. How can you have the nerve to try to get money from my mom?” But my mother-in-law refused to listen to reason, taking the opportunity to play the elder card: “That sounds nice, but would you really let your mom suffer a loss? Who knows how much money you’ve given her behind our backs? Besides, the baby is her grandchild too. Is it about the money or about hurting feelings?” When it’s not about her, she always takes the high road. I scoffed coldly: “How noble of you! You talk about feelings! Well, the baby is your own grandson too. Why don’t you come take care of him for free without asking for money?” “You… how dare you talk back to me like this? I’m still your mother-in-law! Son, control your wife. Look how disrespectful she is to her elders.” Choked by my words, my mother-in-law’s face turned from red to white. She resorted to shifting the topic. “Enough, stop arguing. Mom and Dad, you should go home first. I’ll figure something out!” my husband interrupted impatiently, cutting off the argument between me and his mother. “Alex, Mom knew you wouldn’t let her down. You’re such a good, filial son. I’ll leave that money issue to you to sort out then.” Having achieved her goal, my mother-in-law’s face lit up with a smile. She showered my husband with praise. Then she took my father-in-law’s arm and sauntered out. I sat silently to the side. Inwardly, I resented my husband. Our family wasn’t well-off either. He had taken on this burden, but with his parents’ extravagant spending habits. I feared that once this debt was paid off, they would just borrow more. When would it ever end? After thinking for a long while, I couldn’t hold back and spoke up: “Honey, do you really plan to help your parents pay off this debt? What if they keep borrowing in the future?” My husband took a drag on his cigarette and replied dismissively: “What else can I do? They’re my parents. If I don’t help pay off this debt, who will? People would laugh at me.” I rolled my eyes: “Anyone with eyes can see your parents are just trying to freeload off us because they’re out of money. They want to stay at our place to eat and drink for free, and have me as their unpaid housekeeper to serve your whole family.” As soon as he heard me badmouth his parents, my husband immediately put on a serious face: “That’s enough. It’s natural for parents to rely on their children. Don’t worry, I’ll let them stay for a week, then I’ll send them back home. I can’t just turn them away when they show up at our door with their luggage, can I?” Although I was indignant inside. But thinking about it, what my husband said did make sense. Forcing my in-laws to leave today would likely lead to gossip from the neighbors. “Alright, but remember what you said – send your parents home after a week.” I still made a concession. After my in-laws moved in It was pretty much as I had expected. Because we didn’t agree to pay my mother-in-law, even though I was already run ragged at home, she refused to lend a hand. She waited for me to cook three meals a day and was picky about the food. She had also joined a dance group downstairs. Whenever she had time, she would go dancing in the neighborhood. She didn’t help with any housework at all. That would have been fine. But my in-laws were also not very hygienic. They often left their dirty clothes lying around. They never threw used bags into the trash can. Instead, they just left them on the table. In just a few short days. The house was in a complete mess. I was busy from dawn to dusk every day. Juggling housework and childcare, while also looking after two elderly people. I was on the verge of a mental and physical breakdown. So, after a week. I brought up the idea of having my in-laws return to their own home again. “We’re not going back. Your father and I are comfortable staying here, with good food and drink. Why should we go back to live by ourselves? What? You dare not let your mother-in-law stay at your place?” Sure enough, as soon as I brought it up. My mother-in-law glared coldly at my husband, ignoring me. My husband smiled awkwardly and put some meat in his mother’s bowl: “Mom, my home is your home! Stay as long as you like.” My father-in-law also chimed in while eating: “Alex, you can’t forget your parents just because you got married. It was your mother and I who raised you with such hardship. Now that you’re married, you won’t even let your own parents stay? People would curse you if they heard this.”

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