As my husband lay on his deathbed, he grasped my hand and declared his last will. “Half for our son, half for Bella.” But my name is Claire Evans. Our son nodded, “Aunt Bella has been by your side for half a lifetime. She deserves it.” My husband’s final words were directed at me. “Don’t worry, you’re not left out. You can be buried with me when your time comes.” So, he had a secret lover all these years. The shock caused me to have a stroke, and I died right there by his hospital bed. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself back on the day he asked me to quit my job and become a full-time housewife, claiming our son was too young. 0 I looked around the shabby hospital, feeling disoriented. Jack came rushing in on his old bicycle. “What happened? Kevin’s such a well-behaved kid. How could his teacher page me saying he blinded a classmate?” He frowned at me disapprovingly. “I’ve been telling you, there’s too much going on at home, and the kid’s still young. As a mother, you should quit your job and take care of the family properly. If you had agreed earlier, this wouldn’t have happened.” After dealing with the injured child and paying a hefty compensation, Jack spoke to me again. I finally realized that I had somehow come back to life, reliving the day when he asked me to quit my job and become a full-time housewife to support his career. I couldn’t be blamed for my slow reaction. After all, in my previous life, I had died as an elderly woman. To care for our young son and aging in-laws, I had no choice but to resign from the theater company at the peak of my career. The soon-to-retire director was an old acquaintance of my father’s, and I had learned acting from him since childhood. He tried to persuade me to stay several times, saying that women could hold up half the sky. With my vocal skills and abilities, I had a real shot at taking over his position. Jack, as one of the few university graduates specializing in theater at that time, had been eyeing that position for a long time. If I stepped down, the director’s position would undoubtedly be his. “I shouldn’t interfere with your family matters, but Claire, I hope you keep your fate in your own hands. If one day he turns out to be unfaithful like those characters in our plays, at least you’ll have something to fall back on.” Back then, I was overwhelmed by family responsibilities and swayed by Jack’s sweet words. I firmly believed our marriage was built on love, unlike those arranged marriages. After I resigned, Jack smoothly took over as the theater company director. From then on, he became even busier. Busy writing plays, rehearsing, socializing, and touring across the country. Each time he left, it was for at least a couple of weeks, sometimes even months. I had to handle all the household chores alone. My in-laws were getting old. My mother-in-law would have chest pains whenever she got upset. I took care of them carefully until they passed away peacefully at 83. Our son was different from other children from a young age. He couldn’t speak until he was three. Later, there was a trendy term for it – autism. He liked his classmate’s tiger eraser and tried to grab it, stabbing the classmate’s eye with a pencil. I researched foreign materials, exercised with him every day, and repeated words thousands of times to teach him. Gradually, he started to improve. Fortunately, Jack’s career was smooth sailing, even soaring. He looked vibrant every day, making me seem even more worn out. People on the street sometimes mistook me for his mother. Finally, when he was about to retire, I thought he would fulfill the promise he made when he asked me to quit my job. “I’ll make sure you have a good life. When I have time, I’ll take you traveling everywhere.” Unexpectedly, just as he received his retirement notice, he became agitated and had a heart attack. The doctor issued a critical condition notice. He struggled to sit up, called for medical staff as witnesses, and wanted to make a will. “I’ll divide my assets into two parts, one for our son, and one for Bella Davis.” But my name is Claire Evans. While I was still in shock, our son, whom I had raised to be no different from others, nodded. “Aunt Bella has been by your side for a lifetime. She deserves this.” Jack raised his hand towards me. “I’m not neglecting you either. When your time comes, you can be buried with me.” Only then did I realize that he and Bella Davis, the lead actress in our theater company, had been having an affair for years! I felt dizzy as all the blood rushed to my head. I died right there by his hospital bed. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself back on the day our son got into trouble and was expelled from school, and Jack asked me to quit my job to take care of the family. I lowered my eyes and smirked, “Kevin isn’t just my child. Why should I be the one to quit my job?” 0
For the first time since we met, Jack was stunned by my sharp retort. He stood there, speechless. After a while, he finally found his voice. “I’m the man, the pillar of this family. Naturally, I should take on the responsibility of providing for the family. Why don’t you just stay at home and be a housewife? Isn’t that good?” He softened his voice and promised, “Claire, I promise you, I will definitely…” I cut him off, not wanting to hear that line that had deceived me for half a lifetime. “I will definitely treat you well too. When I have free time, I’ll take you traveling all over the country to enjoy life. Jack, why don’t you quit your job instead? After all, besides our son needing care, your parents need even more attention.” Jack opened his mouth, then closed it again. I initially wanted to propose divorce directly, but in this era, complete freedom of divorce wasn’t possible yet. Even if my parents were relatively open-minded, they probably couldn’t accept my sudden divorce. At the very least, I needed to find evidence of his affair to have public opinion on my side. Finally, Jack and I reached an agreement. We would both compete for the position of theater company director, and whoever lost would resign to take care of the family. Jack looked at me arrogantly. “It’s not like the old days when masters trained apprentices anymore. Being good at singing alone isn’t enough to convince people. The key is having management skills! Let me be clear, you’re close to Director Chen, and your parents have connections with big shots in the theater world. If I find out there’s any unfairness, don’t blame me for not considering our marital bond!” Jack’s tone was harsh and cold, already treating me like an enemy. In my previous life, how could I have thought he was cold on the outside but warm-hearted, responsible for the family? Our son seemed oblivious to our argument, focused on fiddling with the eraser he had snatched. I now know this is a stereotypical behavior of autistic children, but Jack didn’t. He snatched the eraser away and ground it under his foot. “Are you stupid? It’s bad enough that you can’t talk, but you keep causing trouble! Do you know how much trouble you’ve caused? I had to pay a whole year’s salary in compensation!” He then slapped our son’s head several times, still not satisfied. In the past, I would have stopped him. I would have hugged our son, comforting him, saying I’d take responsibility for his mistakes, and then make up the money from my own salary. That’s what I did in my previous life. To get treatment for Kevin in the south, I even borrowed money from my parents. But now, I just stood by coldly, watching. I even wanted to applaud and say, “Well done.” Seeing my lack of reaction, Jack stopped. “Claire Evans, I knew you were cold-hearted!” he said before riding away on his bike. I knew he was betting on me softening towards our son, but when I thought about how in my previous life, the son I had poured my heart and soul into had helped these two despicable people deceive me for half a lifetime, and even said the mistress had it tough, I couldn’t help but feel furious. Thinking of this, I turned and left as well. As I turned the corner, I caught a glimpse of Jack stopping his bike and riding back. See? A child doesn’t die without his mother. Whoever softens first is the one who ends up sacrificing more. This life, I was determined to be the hard-hearted one. But I wasn’t testing him. I really had something to deal with. I needed to find Bella Davis from my previous life, the “Aunt Bella” who Kevin said had been by Jack’s side for half a lifetime and deserved half of his assets. Actually, Bella and I were quite familiar with each other. We both started as lead actresses. But after I gave birth to Kevin, my mother-in-law complained of heart palpitations and couldn’t help with my postpartum care. I had to cook, do laundry, and take care of the baby just two days after giving birth, which led to a herniated disc. I couldn’t dance anymore and could only play supporting roles. She then considered herself the star of the theater company. I never thought about truly competing with Jack for the director position. After all, why make things difficult for myself when there was an easier path? Bella was that easier path. 0
Only now did I understand why Bella, after transferring from the countryside to the city, constantly targeted me. It turns out she was hoping this “first wife” would step down soon, but I had stubbornly refused to fulfill her wish. I had thought Jack and I were in harmony, believing we had fallen in love at first sight. Our first meeting was when he arrived with his luggage to report for duty. I was on stage rehearsing “Romance of the West Chamber,” playing the role of Cui Yingying. The actor playing Zhang Sheng had sprained his ankle, and I was in a dilemma when Jack was pushed onto the stage. He watched me wave my sleeves and twist my waist. Our eyes met and lingered. My heart skipped a beat, and I thought he felt the same. But in my previous life, it wasn’t until I closed my eyes in resentment that I realized the look in his eyes at that time was filled with a strange emotion, as if he was seeing someone else through me. And Bella’s specialty was also “Romance of the West Chamber.” Before returning to the theater company, I took a detour to the department store. In the alley behind the store, a few people were loitering with their hands in their pockets, looking around. Seeing me approach, they came closer and whispered mysteriously, “Want a tape?” When I walked out, I had a cassette voice recorder in my hand. When I got back to the theater company, Bella was on stage rehearsing “Romance of the West Chamber.” Seeing me enter, she twirled, waving her sleeves, and gave me a cold look. In my previous life, I thought she was just jealous of my superior singing skills and that’s why she always gave me a hard time. But now I realize, she resented me for taking her Zhang Sheng, forcing them to become secret lovers. I placed the voice recorder in a corner of the props room. As I came out, I saw Bella clinging to Jack. “Brother Jack, help me rehearse, won’t you~” Without waiting for his response, she put a blue robe on Jack. The two of them, oblivious to others, became intimately entangled on stage under the guise of rehearsing. After finishing a scene, Jack said he needed to return some props himself, and the two walked hand in hand towards the props room. In my previous life, after I had resigned, I once came to bring Jack lunch and saw the two of them walking out of the props room with flushed faces. Jack’s shirt buttons were misaligned. He said they were rehearsing a new play, and I believed him. This time, when they walked out with flushed faces again, I cursed my past naivety while holding my nose and going in to retrieve the voice recorder. Finding a quiet corner, I pressed play. “Bella, these past few days while you were out of town performing, I’ve been going crazy missing you…” After a series of rustling sounds accompanied by moans, Bella spoke: “Thanks to you, my son can come to the city for school. Jack, I’m yours for life!” Bella’s husband was a martial arts actor in the rural theater troupe. He fell from a high platform last year and died on the spot. The theater company, to take care of her, made an exception and transferred her to the city last year. But her child’s residence permit was difficult to arrange. Jack had taken two bottles of good liquor from home a while ago; it turns out he was using them to grease some palms. “Don’t rush. Claire’s family has deep roots, I still need her family’s support. Once I become the director… This arrangement is good for now, we don’t need that piece of paper. My heart is yours, and naturally, so am I.” My heart turned cold. This was a side of Jack I had never seen before. Throughout our years of marriage, even during our newlywed phase, he always maintained a cool and indifferent demeanor. I used to think this was just the unique temperament of a cultured gentleman, different from others. However, I gradually discovered that he could also show a tender, passionate side. I saved the tape and went home. My mother-in-law was listening to the radio. She lifted her eyelids to look at me and said irritably: “What kind of woman are you? Not only do you parade yourself in public, but you also neglect your child! If this were the old days…” I interrupted her: “I would have been divorced already, right? Well, let me tell you, I’m not afraid. And this isn’t the old days anymore. If you want to separate, you need a divorce certificate!” Jack’s mother clutched her chest, her face contorted in pain: “This is outrageous! You’re rebelling! I must tell Jack about this. You’re going to be the death of me!” When Jack came home and saw the cold stove and empty kitchen, he frowned. His mother immediately rushed to him, tearfully recounting my “unfilial” behavior. In my previous life, she had used these two words to manipulate me for a lifetime. I packed my things and walked out with my bag. “There’s an end-of-year performance before next month’s competition. I’m moving to stay at the theater company. Besides, we’re competitors now, it’s not appropriate for us to live together.” I put a hundred dollars on the table. “This is my duty as a mother to Kevin. This money should cover all his expenses for a month.” My monthly salary was 153 , g i v i n g 153,giving100 was already quite generous. Jack angrily smashed his teacup, chipping a piece of white porcelain. “If you have the guts, don’t come back once you leave!” I remained indifferent, glancing at Kevin sitting nearby before leaving without looking back. At the theater company, I rehearsed day and night. This performance was national, and even television stations were coming to film. If I could win first prize, it would help me gain respect when I became the director. But before the day of the performance arrived, the atmosphere in the theater company started to feel off. Wherever I went, there were whispers and pointing behind my back. I deliberately squatted in a corner of the bathroom to eavesdrop on others’ hushed conversations. “Is the news true? Is Claire really having an affair with Director Chen?” “It must be true. The note even detailed which day she entered the director’s office and how long she stayed. If there wasn’t something fishy going on, why would Director Chen support Claire so much? She can’t even play lead roles anymore!” So, this was why Jack dared to speak so harshly to me that day. He had a backup plan. Being the subject of scandalous rumors is devastating for a woman in any era. I couldn’t just passively take the hits. I needed to do something to take control of the situation. 0
As the two women were walking out, I stood up directly from the toilet stall and chased after them. “Is what you’re saying true? Repeat what you just said.” I grabbed the woman who had mentioned the incriminating note. Seeing it was me, her eyes flickered, but she tried to maintain her composure. “Of course, I just heard about it. How shameless of you to make such a fuss about it. Are you trying to make sure everyone in the theater knows? What difference does it make if I repeat it? You’re married to such a good husband like Jack and still not satisfied. You actually had an affair with Director Chen just to win the director position!” This woman was Zoe Parker, who played the role of the matchmaker. She often hung out with Bella. I immediately collapsed to the ground, crying and clinging tightly to her legs. “I had no idea I had been drugged and taken advantage of. I know nothing about what you’re saying. You must help me testify and bring the culprit to justice!” By this time, quite a crowd had gathered to watch the commotion. I looked around with a distraught expression. “Please, can someone help me call the police? I’m a married woman. I never thought I’d be… This is driving me to my death. I can’t go on living!” I used my vocal training to project my voice, startling a flock of sparrows from a nearby tree. Seeing someone rush towards the reception desk in response, Zoe visibly panicked. She started trying to pry my hands off, attempting to free her leg. “I just heard it from someone else. I didn’t see anything myself. How can I testify for you?” I held on even tighter: “Then who did you hear it from? They must know.” Zoe hurriedly blurted out Bella’s name. When the police arrived, they called both Bella and Director Chen over. They also found several notes scattered around the theater, describing my alleged affair with Director Chen. This immediately caused an uproar, even attracting the attention of the provincial theater company’s leadership. I winked at Director Chen. Having watched me grow up, he knew I had my limits. He just gave me a warning glare, indicating we’d settle this later. Under immense pressure, Bella had to admit that she had fabricated the rumors about me and hadn’t actually seen anything. The police sternly told her: “Your behavior has seriously disrupted social order and damaged Claire’s reputation.” Bella looked tearfully towards Jack, who was standing at the edge of the crowd, biting her lip in silence. Jack pushed through the crowd and stepped forward. “Claire is my wife. Since this is all a misunderstanding, and we’re all colleagues here, let’s just treat it as a joke. On her behalf, I won’t pursue this matter any further.” I let out a cold laugh: “Since when do I need you to speak for me? I have my own voice.” “Officer, I want to pursue legal action against those who spread these rumors and restore my reputation!”
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