Joshua and I had been childhood sweethearts for twenty years. At the height of our love, he got into a car accident trying to save me and lost his memory. I bent over backward, doing everything I could to help him remember our past. But to my horror, during this time, he fell in love with the woman who had once bullied me. Private photos of me, taken during the days I was bullied, spread like wildfire online. And he? He wrapped his arm around the woman who tormented me and laughed along with the crowd: “Her? Covered in scars. Just looking at her makes me sick.” When I saw Joshua speaking softly to Ivy, my blood ran cold. I never thought I’d see her again. Back then, after she failed her college entrance exams, Joshua’s family used their influence to make her disappear from Bayhurst for good. I had believed I’d never have to face her again in this lifetime. But here she was. The moment I saw her, I couldn’t stop myself from trembling. The cigarette burns on my arms and thighs—scars that had never fully faded—seemed to come alive again, throbbing with phantom pain. I gripped the doorframe to steady myself, my legs weak. Yet, when I saw her leaning against Joshua’s shoulder with tearful eyes, trembling like some helpless victim, anger surged through me, overpowering my fear. I stormed forward and shoved her away with all my strength. “Get away from him!” Ivy fell heavily onto the couch, looking up at me with wide, frightened eyes before glancing at Joshua, pleading silently for help. Joshua immediately pulled her to her feet, his face full of concern, before turning to me, his expression dark with anger. “Harper, what the hell is wrong with you?!” I panicked, trying to explain. “Joshua, don’t let her fool you! She’s not who you think she is—she’s a terrible person!” He took a deep breath, clearly trying to contain his frustration. “Whether she’s a good person or not isn’t for you to decide!” “And you,” he added, his voice cold, “how long are you going to keep clinging to me just because of some old connection between our families?” I froze, my voice trembling as I tried to reason with him. “I’m not… Joshua, we’re together—we’re a couple!” He rubbed his temples as if my words physically pained him. “Three years. For three years, you’ve been telling me I’m your boyfriend. But I don’t remember anything you’ve been trying so hard to make me believe. You’re the one who’s delusional—don’t drag me into it.” “I tolerated you out of respect for our parents, but this ends here, Harper. You’ve gone too far.” With that, he scooped Ivy into his arms and carried her out of the room, brushing past me without a second glance. As they left, Ivy shot me a triumphant look over his shoulder. The same look she used to give me back then—the look of someone who wouldn’t stop until she’d completely broken me. My legs gave out, and I collapsed onto the floor, gripping the edge of the table for support. My entire body was cold, trembling with fear and anger.
For days, I couldn’t bring myself to go find Joshua. Maybe I was too scared to face the truth—that he might actually be falling for Ivy. But deep down, I kept telling myself that couldn’t be true. He lost his memory because of me. This wasn’t his fault. He just forgot… that’s all… I kept repeating these thoughts to myself like a mantra, trying to convince myself I still had hope. Eventually, I decided to bring him lunch. I spent hours preparing a homemade meal and delivered it to his office. Most of his coworkers knew me, so they let me into his office without any trouble. But I waited for over an hour, and he never showed up. Finally, his secretary came in with an apologetic expression. “Ms. Harper, I’m so sorry, but it seems Mr. Carter stepped out for a meeting.” I nodded, forcing a smile. “That’s okay. I’ll just leave this here for him.” I placed the lunchbox on his desk and instructed the secretary, “He’s probably too busy to remember to eat, so make sure he does, okay? Otherwise, his stomach will act up again.” The secretary couldn’t help but sigh. “You’re so thoughtful, Ms. Harper. Mr. Carter is lucky to have someone like you.” I smiled faintly. “Well, I’ll get going now.” As I left his office building, I hailed a cab to head home. But just as I reached my front door, I realized I’d left my bag behind. I had no choice but to turn back. When I walked through the glass doors of his office again, I froze. There was Ivy, sitting in Joshua’s office, eating the lunch I had made. Joshua was at his desk, glancing at her every so often with a soft, indulgent smile. It was the same look he used to give me before he lost his memory. A sharp pain shot through my chest, a mix of heartbreak and nausea. Without thinking, I stormed into the room, grabbed the lunchbox from Ivy’s hands, and threw it to the ground. Ivy’s head snapped up, her glare piercing. That look—it was too familiar. So familiar that my body went weak, and I instinctively took a step back. Joshua was on his feet in an instant, grabbing my wrist. His voice was filled with rage. “Harper, have you lost your mind again?! Haven’t you caused enough trouble? What did Ivy ever do to you?” I could barely keep my voice steady as I looked him in the eye, tears streaming down my face. “You knew I made that for you. If you didn’t want it, you could’ve thrown it away—but why did you give it to her?” For a moment, Joshua hesitated, my words seeming to strike a nerve. But before he could respond, Ivy chimed in with a soft voice. “Mr. Carter… Harper didn’t mean it. She just likes you so much that she doesn’t want someone like me eating something she made for you.” Whatever flicker of doubt Joshua might have felt disappeared instantly. He turned to her, his voice gentle. “Don’t say that. You’re not ‘someone like that.’” Then, he let go of my wrist, shoving me backward. I stumbled and fell to the floor. Looking down at me, his voice was cold and cutting. “If it’s something you made for me, then it’s mine to decide who gets to eat it. If you don’t want me giving it to someone else, then stop being pathetic and stop bringing me food!” His words shattered me. I don’t even remember how I managed to stand up, or how I forced myself to pick up the broken pieces of the lunchbox and leave his office. I straightened my back, determined not to look as defeated as I felt. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop the tears from falling.
I was about to throw the lunchbox away. But then I remembered it was a gift from Joshua back when I was battling depression and barely had an appetite. He had taught himself how to cook during that time, trying out new recipes every day just to get me to eat a little more. This lunchbox was one of the first things he gave me. I’d kept it all these years, unable to bring myself to let it go. Thinking of the Joshua who used to care for me so deeply, the Joshua who was so kind and loving, I just couldn’t do it. Instead, I grabbed some disinfectant and scrubbed it over and over again. But no matter how clean I tried to make it, the thought of Ivy touching it made me feel sick. No amount of scrubbing could erase the disgust. Just then, my phone rang. On the other end, Joshua’s voice sounded weak. “…Harper, where’s my stomach medicine?” I instinctively answered, “Middle drawer of your nightstand, on the right.” There was a moment of silence. “It’s not there…” I paused, realizing he must’ve run out. Even though I was still angry, I couldn’t help but feel worried. “Is the pain bad? Can you handle it?” Another long silence followed. “…I want some of your shrimp porridge,” he finally said. His tone—it sounded so much like the Joshua I used to know. I couldn’t resist. Before my brain could catch up, the words were already out of my mouth. “Wait for me.” I picked up his prescription from the pharmacy, bought some fresh shrimp and vegetables, and headed to his place. When he opened the door, he looked terrible—his face pale, his lips colorless, his steps unsteady. I immediately handed him a glass of water and the capsules. He took them from me without hesitation, as naturally as if we were back in the old days. Three years of him claiming to hate me, yet he’d grown so used to my care. I got to work on the porridge. Once it was ready, he slowly ate a bowl, and the color started returning to his face. I watched him, lost in thought, and finally asked, “Does it taste good?” He froze, then gave a small, almost imperceptible nod. The truth was, I was the one who loved shrimp porridge—not him. He was the one who used to make it perfectly—not me. Three years had passed, and he still didn’t remember. I forced a small, bitter smile and turned to clean up the dishes. But before I could finish, his phone rang. He answered it, and his expression instantly grew tense. “Are you okay?” “Just stay where you are—I’ll be there right away.” A chill ran down my spine. I didn’t need to guess who was on the other end. My gut told me it was Ivy. I grabbed his wrist before he could leave. “What happened?” His voice was rushed, impatient. “Ivy’s place caught on fire. I need to go check on her.” The moment he said her name, my grip tightened instinctively. “If she had the time to call you, she’s obviously fine. You’re sick—you can’t go out like this…” I was practically begging him at this point. “Please, just don’t go.” But Joshua only frowned, looking at me as if I’d said something unforgivable. “I know you hate Ivy, but how can you say something like that? She’s alone—don’t you think she might be scared?” He pulled his wrist free and stormed out without another word. “She’s alone—don’t you think she might be scared?” Of course, she’d be scared. Just like I was, back when she cornered me in the bathroom stall, holding a lit cigarette that flickered in and out. I had been terrified. Terrified to the point of breaking.
After that incident, Ivy managed to move into Joshua’s house without much resistance. I’d anticipated her next move—I knew her too well. But what I hadn’t expected was for Joshua to actually agree to it. I thought my heart had already gone numb, but the pain of it hit me harder than I imagined. What surprised me even more was the night of Mr. Carter’s birthday celebration. Joshua brought Ivy to the party. I was sitting in the living room chatting with Mr. and Mrs. Carter when the room suddenly fell silent. Following everyone’s gaze, I turned and saw Joshua walking in, arm in arm with Ivy. It wasn’t just me. Mr. and Mrs. Carter’s faces also darkened in shock. Especially Mrs. Carter—she shot up from her seat, her eyes blazing with fury as she glared at Ivy. “What are you doing here?! Get out!” Ivy immediately hid behind Joshua, feigning fear. Joshua frowned. “Mom, I brought Ivy here. How can you treat her like that?” Mr. Carter, unable to stay seated any longer, stood and pointed an accusing finger at Joshua. “You ungrateful brat! Have you even thought about how Harper feels?!” Out of respect for my feelings, my parents and the Carters had never mentioned Ivy in front of me, nor had they spoken to Joshua about her. They had watched as Joshua, after losing his memory, became less and less like the person he once was. But none of them could have imagined he’d go so far as to bring Ivy into his life—and now into their home. Joshua, seemingly dismissive of the gravity of Ivy’s past, furrowed his brow and said, “Ivy’s already explained everything to me. She was just young and reckless back then. Why does everyone have to be so aggressive?” “Aggressive?!” Mr. Carter’s voice was shaking with anger. “If she has so much to explain, it’s Harper she should be apologizing to—not you!” Furious, he shouted for security. “Get this woman out of my house!” Joshua immediately stepped forward to block them. “All this over some petty incident? Do you really have to treat Ivy this way?” A sharp pang shot through my chest. So to Joshua now, everything Ivy had done to me was just some petty incident. Suddenly, Joshua whipped his head around and glared at me, his eyes filled with hostility. “It was you, wasn’t it?” “You’re disgusting. Spreading lies about Ivy to my parents? How pathetic can you get?” Mrs. Carter, trembling with rage, slapped him hard across the face. “You—!” she shouted, unable to finish her sentence as her voice broke with fury. Ivy gasped, her face full of tears, looking like a helpless victim. “Joshua, don’t fight with your family because of me. It’s all my fault—I’ll leave, okay?” She turned and ran toward the door, sobbing. Joshua immediately chased after her. I grabbed his wrist before he could leave, my voice shaking as I asked, “Do you love her?” He looked at me with nothing but contempt, his voice dripping with venom. “Yes. I love her.” With that, he wrenched his wrist free and ran after Ivy without looking back.
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