I was reborn. Reborn to the day my whole pack got slaughtered. Same night. Same spot in the woods. I’m hiding behind the same rock. Killian finds me again. He’s standing over me, breathing hard, blood on his chest. Not his. “Anyone else from your pack make it out?” Last time, I said no. I didn’t know Vanessa was alive. I didn’t know she was three miles away, hiding in a hollow tree, waiting. The rogues found her before he did. They kept her three months. She came back pregnant. He blamed me for it. Took me as my mate anyway, because he owed my father. And then he punished me for ten years. His last words to me were, “Next time, I won’t pick you.” Funny. Here we are. I look up at him. “My sister. Vanessa. She’s in the old hollow tree by the creek.” The second the words leave my mouth, a figure comes running out of the dark. She grabs my hands, tears all over her face. “Cara — Cara, are you hurt — I thought I’d never see you again —” Her hands are warm. “I’m okay,” I say. Killian steps closer. His shadow falls over both of us. He takes off his cloak and puts it around Vanessa. “It’s cold. You’re shaking.” His voice is soft. His eyes never touch me. Not once. So that’s why he was fifteen minutes late this time. Vanessa wipes her face. “Cara, this is Alpha Killian. He visited our pack once when we were pups, do you remember?” She tries to say more. Her face crumbles. She can’t. Killian’s hand on her arm goes white. “Not here,” he says. “I’m taking you both home.” Killian walks with Vanessa. I follow behind. His eyes never come back to me. He’s keeping his promise. The one he made on his deathbed. Next time, I won’t pick you. Good. This life, I can finally breathe. Three days through the forest. We reach Killian’s territory. Vanessa and I get placed in the same wing of the pack house. Misty Pear House. The wing he banned me from, last life. It’s hers. White pear blossoms in the courtyard, just like our family home. Her incense burning. Her tea on the table. Except the painting is gone. Last life, I walked in here once. By accident. Killian was standing in front of a painting of a she-wolf. His eyes were soft — the kind of soft I never saw, would never see. Before I could see her face, he turned and caught me. “Who let you in?” “I told you. You don’t step foot in here. Not in this life.” I didn’t understand the regret in his eyes then. He punished me anyway. Three nights, no fire, dead of winter. My knees ached so bad I couldn’t sleep. I begged him to stay in his bed a little longer, just for the warmth. He laughed. “The Whitepine pack was supposed to raise respectable she-wolves. How did they end up with a slut like you?” That night he ripped me apart. I almost died. “Anything else you need? I’ll have it sent over.” His voice. Right behind me. Soft. Sweet. Talking to her. Vanessa laughs. “Alpha, you spoil me. I have everything.” She turns. “Cara? What about you?” His eyes land on me for the first time since the woods. Like a hand around my throat.
The pressure is suffocating. My legs ache again. I drop my head. “Thank you, Alpha. I don’t need anything.” A quiet laugh. I don’t have to look up. I heard that laugh ten thousand times last life. Cold, with mockery underneath. That life was too heavy. Whatever happens this time, I’m done with this male. But I can’t avoid him. Because of Vanessa, he’s here all the time. Honey cakes. Romance novels. Little gifts to make a she-wolf smile. She’s falling for him too. I can see it. Good. Without me in the way, they were always meant for each other. “Cara, do you think it’s pretty?” Vanessa holds something up. A wolf-tooth pendant, two wolves curled around each other, tied to a leather cord. I nod. “It’s beautiful. Your hands are the best in our pack. He’ll love it.” She lowers her head, smiling. “You always know what to say.” Then her smile thins. “There are so many high-ranked she-wolves here. I don’t know if Alpha Killian would even —” “He will.” I say it too fast. Because I remember. Last life, after Vanessa came back, after Killian and I were already mated, I was desperate. A she-wolf told me — males can’t resist a handmade token. Carve one. Put your scent on it. My hands are clumsy. The two wolves I carved looked like drowned rats. I kept cutting my own fingers. There was blood on the cord by the time I finished. That same week, I saw Killian walk out of Vanessa’s wing, smiling. A wolf-tooth pendant on his belt. Hers. Of course. The she-wolf wasn’t wrong. Males do melt for tokens. She forgot to add — only from the female they actually love. For a few days after that, Killian was almost kind. Even brought me cakes from the bakery on the east side. I never gave him my ugly pendant. It disappeared. Someone probably thought it was trash. A maid calls Vanessa out. She sets the pendant down and goes. I stare at it. If I could carve like that, would someone love me too? A shadow falls over the table. I think it’s Vanessa. I pick the pendant up to hand it back. I look up. Black eyes. Right in front of me. Killian’s mouth twists. “Cara. What are you trying now?” The disgust hits me before the words do. “You’re really that cheap? Crawling into my bed again?” “I told you. I will never take you as my mate. Get it through your head.” The old fear rolls through me. He smells like that winter — pine, frost, blood. My hands shake. It takes forever to find my voice. “Alpha. This isn’t mine. Vanessa carved it for you.” He freezes. Something twists across his face. Half a second. Gone. “Alpha?” Vanessa, in the doorway. He steps back. His face smooths out. Soft again. “Cara was showing me something. Said it was yours.” Vanessa goes red. But she stands tall. “Forgive me, Alpha. I don’t have much to offer. But my hands are decent. I made it for you.” I shove the pendant into her hand and run. My legs are still shaking outside. I wipe sweat off my forehead. Spring in this territory. Why is it still so cold.
By that afternoon, the whole pack house knows. Alpha Killian has claimed Vanessa as his Luna. The mating ceremony is set for the third of next month. It moves through the halls like fire. Maids, guards, everyone buzzing. Red banners going up by sundown. Alphas from neighboring packs sending gifts before nightfall. So this is what it looks like when an Alpha takes the female he actually wants. Last life, my mating ceremony took one day to plan. He looked at me with empty eyes. “My parents are dead. You’re a rogue’s daughter. We’re not making a fuss.” I nodded. He saved me and wanted to make me his Luna. I had no reason to say no. His parents had been Alphas. Guarded the northern border for two generations. Died there. That was the official story. My father was Beta of the Whitepine pack. Got dragged into a power struggle between two of the Lycan King’s heirs. Our whole pack got slaughtered. Thirty-five wolves. Dead in one night for nothing. Killian taking in the only orphan to clear his debt to my father — nobody questioned it. He just didn’t love me. That was all. I touch my face. Wet. I wipe it fast. Cried once. That’s enough. That night, Vanessa crawls into my bed like we’re little she-pups again. “Cara. Are you happy I’m getting mated?” I pick my words. “Of course. Alpha Killian is good to you. He’ll be a good mate.” She looks at me. “Yes. He will.” Her voice changes. “But I’m worried about you. We’re rogue’s daughters, Cara. The King hates our pack name. One day even an Alpha won’t be able to protect you.” I don’t fully get it. But ten years with Killian taught me how to read a face. Something cold in her eyes. Something pulling away. I make my voice small. “Sister — what should I do?” She strokes my hair. “Don’t be scared. I’ll find you a mate of your own.” Next day, she takes me out. Excuse: buying things for the ceremony. Real reason: she lines up four males for me. I turn down them all. Warriors remind me of Killian. The last one is Caleb. Beta of a smaller pack on the south side. Soft eyes. Quiet voice. Hands that have never held a blade. He gives me a small handmade rabbit toy at our first meeting. Little wood-carved thing with floppy ears. I want to give him something back. I sneak into the kitchen the second we’re home. I’m not good at much. But I can bake. Even Killian — who never said a kind word — used to eat what I made without complaining. Honey cakes. My mother’s recipe. I want Vanessa to taste one first. I head to her wing with the box. The first person I see in the courtyard is Killian. I drop my eyes. “Alpha.” He walks toward me. Slow. His eyes drop to the box. The mockery is so casual it burns. He reaches in. Takes a cake. Crushes it between his fingers. “Cara. You really aren’t afraid to die, are you.” Low and mean. My lips go white. You don’t owe him anything anymore. I step back. Keep my voice flat. “These are for my sister. And for Caleb. If the Alpha wants honey cakes, the kitchen can make some.” His hand stops. “Caleb. Who is Caleb.” The door opens. Vanessa walks in, light as anything. “Caleb is the Beta I picked for Cara.”
Something flickers across Killian’s face. Gone in a second. His voice goes flat. Cold. “She’s too young. No rush to find her a mate.” Vanessa laughs. “You don’t know how a she-wolf’s mind works. Caleb and Cara are alike — both gentle, both kind. His pack is a little small, sure, but that means no politics either.” She looks at me. “Besides, Cara likes him.” I nod fast. Anything to make Killian stop looking at me like that. “Caleb is great. He made me a rabbit toy on the first day.” Killian says nothing. His eyes are dark. Unreadable. But he’d never get mad at Vanessa. That stare is terrifying. I slip back to my room before he can say another word. Behind me, Vanessa’s voice floats through the door. “Are you upset with me?” A little pout in it. Playful. “It’s my fault. I should’ve told you first. Punish me if you want. I can take it.” I can’t help it. I glance back. Killian’s mouth curves, just barely. He leans down and says something low. Vanessa swats his arm, blushing. Last life, watching this would’ve torn me apart. Jealousy, bitterness, all of it crashing over me like a wave. This time — nothing. Good enough. The honey cakes never made it out. Killian sent word: giving gifts in private is what loose she-wolves do. It shames the pack. His pack doesn’t need that kind of embarrassment. Last life, after I became his mate, that’s the word he used most. Loose. Shameless. If it weren’t for my father, he’d never have taken me. He hated that I couldn’t read. Hated that I wasn’t smart enough. Three days after our mating ceremony, he brought in a tutor. History. Math. Everything, crammed into my skull until my head was splitting. Every night he tested me. Every wrong answer — his hand came down. Hard. The pain shot from my palm through my whole body. “Cara. Again.” His face like stone. I was so scared I passed out. When I woke up, the tutor was gone. Killian never brought it up again. “Cara, you’re the dumbest wolf I’ve ever met.” He stared at my bloody palms, mouth full of ugly words. “What the hell did your father teach you? How did you turn out like this?” But then he took my hands, one at a time, and dabbed medicine on them. Gentle. Careful. Light through the window on his lowered brow. That was Killian. Always like that. Hit you, then patch you up. Like training a dog. That night I couldn’t sleep. Killian’s face kept snarling through my dreams. I woke up drenched in cold sweat. But none of it happened. Not this time. The ceremony is getting close. The pack house is busier every day. Caleb keeps sending little things. He’s not a talker, but he makes you feel safe. I write him back every time. The dark cloud from the last few days starts to lift. Until a servant from Caleb’s pack delivers a message. “Beta Caleb says he’s been reassigned to a pack down south. Leaving today. He wants to know if you’d go with him. If you’re willing, he’ll meet you at the south gate.” I go quiet. Before I can answer, one of Vanessa’s maids rushes in. “Miss! The Luna-to-be broke out in a rash — her whole body — please come quick!” My stomach drops. I run. It’s an allergic reaction. Someone put hazelnut in the morning porridge. I tell the maids to boil herb water and wash her down. After one round, the rash fades. Vanessa falls asleep, exhausted. I pick up the basin and head out. A tall shadow blocks the doorway. “What’s wrong — your perfect little mate gets taken away, so now you’re walking around with a face like a corpse?”
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