Ten Years Wasted on the Wrong Man

I broke up with Carter on Christmas Eve. He asked carelessly, “Just because there wasn’t a seat for you at the family dinner?” “Yes.” At the annual Christmas Eve family dinner, a table set for twenty people didn’t have a single empty seat for me. No one noticed me standing awkwardly at the door. Carter only focused on serving soup to Chloe, our sponsored charity case. In the end, a server had to add a flimsy white plastic chair for me. “Breaking up on Christmas Eve is just bad luck. Stop throwing a tantrum and don’t embarrass me in front of my family.” This past year, we’d fought countless times because of Chloe. Every single time, I was the one who backed down and apologized. He didn’t believe for a second that I’d actually leave him. But this time, I was done. I opened the message I’d received just minutes ago. [I’ll pick you up after the show wraps. Should be there around midnight.] I typed back a single word. [Okay.] From now on, Carter would just be another ex I didn’t need to mention. … Carter grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “Alright, stop pouting. You keep scowling like this and you’ll ruin Christmas for everyone.” I remained expressionless and pushed his hand away. “You know, you’ve got a pretty face, but you’re just so unlikable. Look at Chloe, she sits there and all the kids climb all over her.” He clearly hadn’t taken my breakup comment seriously at all. “Carter, I mean it this time.” He finally dropped that cocky smirk. “So you’re really going to break up with me over a damn chair? Come on, Serena, are you seriously that petty?” “Yes. At your family’s Christmas Eve dinner, the person sitting next to you wasn’t me. It was Chloe.” Of course it mattered. Christmas Eve. Carter insisted on bringing Chloe, the college student we sponsored, to his family dinner. When we got to the banquet hall entrance, Carter remembered he’d left two bottles of vintage Bordeaux in the underground wine cellar. He sent me down to get them. By the time I came back with the wine, everyone had already been seated. The Harrington relatives were toasting each other, exchanging well wishes. No one noticed I was still standing. Carter was attentively serving Chloe food and soup, as if they were the loving couple. A server noticed I had nowhere to sit and tried to make room. Carter waved it off casually. “The regular chairs won’t fit. Just grab a plastic one from the storage room.; she can squeeze in. It’s fine, she’s skinny.” That dirty white plastic chair was painfully out of place. Carter explained, “It was crowded and loud. I wanted you to sit next to me, but everyone had already settled in. Moving people around would’ve been a hassle.” “If you’re really going to be this jealous over a chair, I’ll save you a seat for the rest of the holidays, alright?” His tone sounded like he was placating a bratty child. I took a deep breath. “You don’t get it. It’s not about the damn chair.” “You’re right, I don’t get it. These are such small things. You really don’t need to make a big deal out of them.” I felt utterly exhausted. I didn’t expect him to change anymore. “Carter, this strawberry is so sweet!” Chloe picked up a chocolate-dipped strawberry and naturally fed it right into Carter’s mouth. Seeing my expression darken, she immediately asked with fake concern, “What’s wrong? Carter, did you upset Serena again?” Carter pursed his lips but said nothing. Chloe immediately jumped in to mediate. “Serena, please don’t be mad at him. It’s all my fault. When there’s food around, I just get tunnel vision. I’m the outsider here. I should’ve been the one sitting on that plastic chair.” She tugged lightly on Carter’s sleeve. “Maybe I should just go back to campus? There’s no reason to make Serena uncomfortable over something this small.” I let out a cold laugh. “Small?” “You, an outsider, crashing my family’s Christmas dinner is small? Having my boyfriend at the top of your contacts is small? Wearing matching bracelets with my boyfriend is also small?” “Chloe, I just can’t figure out why you keep pulling these disgusting little stunts.” “Since you like my boyfriend so much, I’ll break up with him. He’s all yours.” Chloe bit down hard on her lower lip, tears welling up in her eyes. “How can you say that, Serena?” She reluctantly removed her bracelet. “You’re totally misunderstanding. My hometown is so remote. It takes three days by bus and train to get there. I couldn’t possibly make it home for Christmas.” “I don’t have anyone here. If Carter hadn’t been kind enough to take me in, I’d be stuck in my dorm eating ramen.” “If you’re bothered by me, I’ll just leave.” She placed the bracelet on the table and ran out crying. Carter shot me an irritated glance. “If you’ve got a problem, take it out on me. Why are you bullying her?” “You want to break up? Fine. But don’t drag her into it.” He grabbed the bracelet and chased after her. Suddenly, I realized this relationship was absolutely rotten.

After ten years together, I never imagined our breakup would be this casual. That afternoon, Carter’s cousins were organizing a poker game in the group chat. I didn’t want to ruin everyone’s holiday mood, so I forced myself to go. Just as I reached the billiard room door, I heard them talking about me. “Is Serena not coming today? Are you two fighting again?” “Yeah, because he saved a seat for Chloe at lunch but not for her.” Someone laughed mockingly. “She’s throwing a fit over that? How old is she? If there’s no seat, find one yourself. Serena’s so damn dramatic.” “Right? Remember that hiking trip? Carter and Chloe hiked ahead without waiting for her, and she got pissed. We couldn’t even eat together on the way down because of her tantrum.” “When I get married, I’m definitely not picking someone this jealous. Honestly, someone easygoing like Chloe seems way better.” Carter sighed. “What can I do? That’s just her personality. I spoiled her since we were kids. I’ll deal with it.” Someone laughed. “Keep spoiling her, and soon you won’t be able to say a single word to another girl.” A soft, gentle voice chimed in. “Serena’s so lucky to have such a great boyfriend like Carter. I could never be that fortunate.” Chloe hadn’t left at all. Carter’s friends immediately started egging them on. “Well, tonight your Carter can spoil you for once.” “Really? Then you won’t take my Pocket Queens, will you, hubby?” She used a playful tone when she said it. I heard Carter’s voice, tinged with amusement, respond to her. “Fine. I won’t.” Everyone laughed. Then Carter spoke again. “Don’t go spreading this around as a joke, or I’ll have to spend the next few days apologizing to my girlfriend and won’t have time to play poker with you guys.” I let go of the door handle. Laughter continued to drift from inside the room. Carter knew damn well how much I hated the ambiguous relationship between him and Chloe. He claimed he was afraid of making me angry, yet he didn’t stop Chloe from calling him “hubby.” At the end of the day, it was because he was absolutely certain I could never leave him. But this time, he was wrong. Shortly after, Chloe posted on Instagram. [First time playing poker with the big bros and sisters during the holidays. Lost so bad!] In her selfie, her forehead was covered with sticky notes, and a large hand was affectionately pinching her cheek. That familiar engagement ring stung my eyes. I scrolled through and saw Carter’s comment underneath. [Who’s bullying you? I’ll get revenge for you. LOL] I turned off my phone and called my dad. “Dad, I’m coming to spend Christmas with you in Silverpine. I’ll be there around midnight.” He paused, sounding surprised. “What made you change your mind?” I fought to keep my voice steady, hiding the sadness. “I miss you. I’ve spent the past few years with the Harringtons. I want to come home.” My dad immediately picked up on my distress. “Of course, sweetheart. I actually already washed your sheets and made up your bed.” “Should Dad come pick you up right now?” Hearing the warmth in his voice, my chaotic emotions began to settle. “No need. Someone’s picking me up. Just leave the door unlocked for me.”

When Carter came home with Chloe, I was making Christmas cookies with his relatives. His aunt glanced at Chloe, hesitating before speaking. “Serena, you two should get married this year, right? Marriage and a baby will stabilize the relationship.” Carter’s mother came over with a bowl of cookie dough, smiling. “That’s what I keep telling her. Serena was running that bakery studio before, and those ovens give off so much radiation.” “This year she finally listened and sold the business. We’ll have the wedding in the spring, and I’ll probably be holding my grandson by fall.” Everyone could see how close Carter was with Chloe, but they all thought the problem was me. I glanced at Carter. He acted like he hadn’t heard a word. Familiar music suddenly played, and the kids rushed to the TV. “It’s Mason!” I looked up sharply. That familiar face appeared on the screen. At the Christmas Eve live concert venue, he was holding a vinyl record and signing it. He waved at the camera with a warm smile. The host asked, “Mason, this is your first time performing on Christmas Eve, right? How are you planning to spend tonight?” “Of course with my most important family. As soon as the show ends, I’m going to see my family.” The host continued, “Let’s see what Mason wrote on that vinyl!” He playfully held it up to the camera. On the record sleeve, the dedication read: “To new beginnings and bright futures – with Serena.” I stared at my name, my heart pounding. Carter’s mother couldn’t help but comment, “These young male celebrities are so handsome nowadays.” Chloe immediately jumped in. “Mrs. Harrington, he’s this year’s hottest pop star. I’ve been dying to see his concert, but I can never get tickets.” Everyone chatted and laughed, but all I could think about was the word “family” he’d said. Once upon a time, Carter had also said I was his family forever. The winter I turned eight, my mom died after a long illness. My dad was in a daze for months, sometimes sitting at home in silence for entire days. He barely had the energy to take care of me. That year, we had to write an essay called “My Mother” for class. I turned in a blank page. The teacher made me stand at the front of the class. A classmate said, “Serena’s mom is dead. Of course she can’t write it.” Carter threw that kid’s book on the floor and threatened to beat anyone who said that again. After school, he walked me home. When we got to my building, he flicked my forehead. He said, “Serena, be brave. Don’t let anyone bully you.” From then on, he always walked me home after school. When my dad couldn’t take care of me, Carter would bring me to his house for dinner. I hated the holidays, so every year Carter made sure to include me in his family’s celebrations. He said he was my family. Forever. Later, my dad got transferred to Silverpine for work. After college, I stayed in this city because of Carter. But last Christmas, he broke that promise. On Christmas Eve, the pipes in Chloe’s dorm burst, and the water was shut off. He got the call and rushed out without even finishing dinner, frantically helping her find a place to stay. After he found her a hotel room, he took her out to dinner to comfort her. I waited until after midnight for him to come home. That was the first time we ever fought. From then on, the friction between us only grew. He kept telling me, “Chloe’s had it so rough. Do you know how hard it is to get out of poverty and make it to college? We need to help her.” “Stop being so jealous. If you had even an ounce of compassion, you wouldn’t go after her like this.” But then I found bikini selfies Chloe had sent him in his messages. He deleted them right in front of me and said coldly, “She’s just a kid messing around. Don’t take it seriously.” Maybe he just loved being pursued. But I was done living like this. My phone buzzed, pulling me back to reality. Someone in our college group chat had posted a screenshot, asking if the person in the photo was me. I opened it. It was a post Mason had just made on Twitter. He’d written just four words: [My family.] Attached was a photo from a volunteer event at a children’s shelter. I was standing right next to Mason. In front of us were kids learning to decorate gingerbread cookies. Before I could respond, Carter replied in the group chat. [No way. Just someone who looks like her.] [How the hell would Serena know a pop star? Absolutely impossible.] Seeing him panic like that, I almost found it funny. After he finished typing, he slammed his phone down on the coffee table, accidentally knocking over a glass of juice that spilled onto his pants. Chloe immediately grabbed several napkins and, without thinking, knelt down and started gently wiping his thigh. Carter cleared his throat awkwardly, and only then did she stop. I laughed softly. “You two look way more like a couple.”

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