I Ordered My Own Funeral Three Years Ago

Three years after my death, Amber is finally marrying my boyfriend, Ethan. To make this happen, Eleanor hid my death from Ethan for three whole years. The day before the wedding. Ethan received an order to clean out a deceased person’s estate. Amber told him to come home early. But she had no idea—I was the one who placed that order, three years ago. 1 “Ethan, does this wedding dress look good on me?” Ethan sat on the sofa, staring at the gown blankly. He muttered instinctively, “Chloe?” Amber froze. “What did you say?” Ethan snapped out of it and gave her a faint smile. “Yeah. It looks beautiful.” Amber turned her back, her expression instantly twisting into venom. She gripped the fresh lace of the gown, wrinkling it. “Chloe, you’ve been dead for three years, and you still have a hold on him. Impressive.” Eleanor stepped forward, patting her shoulder to remind her to keep her composure. She pulled the changing curtain shut and whispered, “She’s dead. Why do you care? You’re the one Ethan is marrying anyway.” I stood behind them, imagining what I would look like in a wedding dress. This wedding should have been mine. Amber and I are half-sisters. Eleanor hated my dad, and that hatred extended to me. When I first found out I was sick, I begged Eleanor for money to treat my illness. But what did she say? “If you’re going to die, do it far away from us. Don’t ruin our sight.” “I can’t wait for you to die. You’re just as shameless as your father.” She claimed she had no money for my treatment. Yet, when Amber whined just a little, Eleanor bought her an expensive grand piano overnight. When I died, she wouldn’t even claim my body. She hired a random task-runner to throw my ashes into the river. Ethan thought I had run away because I didn’t want to marry him. So, he hated me too. “Ethan, we’re getting married in a few days. Don’t you think we should let my sister know?” Ethan frowned, a flash of annoyance crossing his face. “She’s been gone for three years and never bothered to contact us. Why look for her?” I waved my hands at him frantically. No, Ethan, no! I never left. I’ve been right by your side this whole time! But he couldn’t hear me. Amber leaned against Ethan’s shoulder, placing a hand over her stomach. Her happiness was suffocating. “Thank you, Ethan. I love the dress. And the baby loves it too.” She was pregnant. The baby was Ethan’s. My heart ached with an unbearable sadness. I knew how much Ethan loved kids. He used to say he wanted a baby boy so the two of them could spoil me together. But now, he was having a child, and the woman he was going to spoil wasn’t me. Bzzt—bzzt— Ethan’s phone buzzed on Snapchat. He let out a quiet sigh, gently pushed Amber away, and answered. It was an order for a death cleaning service. The customer service rep mentioned the order had been placed three years ago. Ethan just muttered an “okay” and hung up. It wasn’t unusual. Many clients pre-ordered death cleanups for themselves. I once asked Ethan why a computer science genius like him would choose this job. He told me that when his mother died, he found that sorting through her belongings told him things he couldn’t see with his eyes. He said a death cleaner is the one who helps the deceased put the final period on their life story. So, Ethan, I chose you to write the final period for mine. “What’s wrong, Ethan? A new job?” Amber asked softly, walking over. Ethan nodded. “Yeah. A last-minute cleanup. I can’t make it to the wedding rehearsal with you. Go ahead without me. I’ll head back as soon as I’m done.” Amber was the picture of understanding. She handed Ethan his bag and kissed his cheek. “Okay. Come home early.” She had no idea that this order was placed by me, three years ago. 2 Because of his unusual profession, Ethan had very few friends. He only brought one assistant, Luke, to the address. Ethan stood at the door, whispered a short prayer for the deceased, put on his mask and gloves, and walked in. Looking at the dusty, chaotic room, my soul trembled. Three years had passed, but the phantom pain didn’t fade at all. Luke stared at the deep gouges on the door, shocked. “Ethan, look at these scratch marks…” Ethan knelt down to inspect them. “They’re so deep. The victim must have suffered horribly before she died.” “Whatever. Let’s just pack the stuff. This isn’t our business.” Luke nodded and began working. Ethan looked around, found a box, opened it, and pulled out a card. It read: Happy Birthday to me. I hadn’t been here in so long. I floated over to him to look. When was this from? Ah, probably when I turned twelve. My parents were in a custody battle. I stood in that cold, massive courtroom. The judge asked me, “Who do you want to live with?” My dad looked away, ignoring me. Eleanor glared at me, a silent threat not to choose her. Terrified, I burst into tears, ran over, and gently tugged on Eleanor’s skirt. “Mom, can I please stay with you?” In the end, the judge ruled in my favor based on my wishes and gave custody to Eleanor. But she was in a rush to buy a birthday cake for Amber. She left me alone at the courthouse entrance. It was pouring rain. By the time I made it home on foot, Eleanor was softly singing Amber to sleep because she was scared of thunder. She forgot that day was my birthday too. I had licked the leftover frosting off a discarded cake box in the trash, and told my reflection in the mirror: Happy Birthday. It was so long ago. Just thinking about it gave me a headache. Ethan gently touched the card, then picked up a small plush toy. Underneath it was a ripped diary page. Seeing that toy, I instinctively backed away, screaming at Ethan. Don’t touch it! Put it down! Just looking at it forced my soul to relive the memory that made me shudder. I had gotten first place on my exams. I was so happy. Eleanor had promised that whoever got first place would get a wish. There was a little plush keychain at the neighborhood convenience store that I had wanted for months. But when I excitedly asked for it, Eleanor crumpled my exam sheet and threw it in the trash. Her eyes were ice-cold. “Amber made progress this time, so I bought it for her. Maybe next time.” I turned and saw Amber smirking, dangling the toy in my face. For the first time, I couldn’t take it. I ran out of the house. Behind me, Eleanor’s furious voice echoed: “Run off then! Don’t you dare come back!” I cried hysterically on the street. The creepy owner of the convenience store, Marcus, saw me. He told me to come into the back room and he’d give me one. Oh God. The back of that shop was a nightmare. He dragged me in, pinned me down, and tore me apart. I screamed and begged, but he wouldn’t stop. When I finally escaped, I ripped that plush toy to shreds. Do you believe that souls can cry? I stood in front of Ethan, watching him read that crumpled diary page with a heavy frown. My tears fell like rain, passing right through the paper and landing on Ethan’s hand. “Sigh…” Hearing Ethan gasp, Luke turned around. “Ethan? What’s wrong?” Ethan’s voice trembled with disbelief. “She… she was assaulted.” Ethan picked up the remaining diary pages. October 14th Amber brought some girls to beat me up. I was so scared. She said I deserved it. November 3rd Amber told Eleanor I was sleeping around. Eleanor called me a whore. But that was Amber’s boyfriend. December 12th Eleanor’s new boyfriend came into my room while I was napping. He touched me. Eleanor caught him, but she beat me instead. She called me a cheap seductress. Ethan’s hands shook violently as he held the pages. He had to take deep breaths just to keep from breaking down. He forced himself to keep going through my past. But when he picked up the next item, he lost all control. 3 It was a medical report for severe clinical depression, with my name on it: Chloe Miller. The moment Ethan saw my name, his pupils dilated. His hand shook so violently he dropped the paper several times. “Luke… come here. Tell me… am I seeing things?” Luke put down his box and walked over. “Chloe? No way…” He was just as shocked. Ethan quickly pulled out his phone and checked the Snapchat number that placed the order. When the office read aloud the number he knew by heart, he finally had to accept the truth. It was me. Ethan, you finally found out. I didn’t abandon you. I didn’t run away from our wedding. I was just… dead. It was as if all the strength had been drained from Ethan’s body. He collapsed onto the floor. Luke tried to help him up, but Ethan pushed him away. He whispered, “Luke, leave. Let me finish this alone.” “Ethan…” “Leave!” Luke had no choice but to walk out. I sat down next to Ethan. Suddenly, I remembered a summer day during our Freshman Orientation Week when we sat on the high school bleachers just like this. I was a girl of few words, and so was he. When two quiet people got together, we spent most of our time just staring into space in comfortable silence. The teachers said we were a perfect match. That was the first time Ethan smiled at me. “You’re amazing,” he had said. And I replied, “You too.” Our love story wasn’t filled with dramatic grand gestures, but during every major moment of our lives, we chose to be by each other’s side. Ethan buried his face in his knees, his shoulders shaking as he began to sob. “Why? Why? Why did this happen?” I reached out, trying to stroke his hair. Ethan, don’t cry. It breaks my heart. Ethan’s profession wasn’t popular, so his studio had been struggling. When I found out I was dying, I placed this order on PayPal. It wasn’t much, but I wanted to give him one last piece of business. I had never seen Ethan cry like this. After half an hour, he forced himself to calm down, stood up, and kept searching. Ethan locked himself in that apartment for two whole days. He spent two days digesting the brutal reality of my death. As he lay curled up on the dusty floor, his face pale, his phone suddenly buzzed with a FaceTime call. “Ethan? Where are you?” Hearing Amber’s anxious voice on the other end, a chilling clarity returned to Ethan’s eyes. He pushed himself up, his voice freezing cold. “I’m on my way. Wait for me.” Ethan packed up all my belongings in a box and left the apartment. He clutched the box tightly, stroking it as he walked. He whispered, “Chloe, I’ll make them pay for what they did to you. Every single one of them.” I followed behind him, sighing. I’m already dead, Ethan. What’s the point of revenge? The only thing I couldn’t let go of was you. Maybe that was why my soul kept lingering by his side. The next day was the wedding. Amber wrapped her arms around Ethan’s neck, trying to kiss him. “Ethan, I’m so happy. I’m the luckiest girl in the world.” Whether intentionally or not, Ethan turned his head, and her lips missed. He gently pushed her away, using the excuse that tomorrow would be a busy day, and went to sleep. Amber frowned, assuming he was just exhausted. She didn’t think much of it and turned over to sleep. The wedding day arrived. Ethan wore his custom-tailored tuxedo. I hovered in front of him, constantly telling him how handsome he looked on Twitter. When I was alive, I never realized how precious speaking was. Now that I was dead, I couldn’t stop talking. Ethan took a simple silver bracelet from my box and put it on his wrist. He whispered, “Chloe, let’s pretend we’re getting married today, okay?” I blushed and looked away. Who wants to marry you? You haven’t even proposed properly yet! Why did my cheeks feel so warm? Amber wore a flowing, beautiful white gown. Eleanor walked her down the aisle. Ethan stood at the altar, frozen. The priest looked anxious, but finally, Ethan forced a smile and took her hand. Amber’s eyes welled with tears of excitement. The priest asked, “Do you take Amber to be your lawfully wedded wife?” Ethan suddenly looked directly toward where I was standing. He said clearly, “I do not.” The entire chapel fell into dead silence. Even I was shocked. Amber’s hand in Ethan’s began to shake violently. “Ethan… what?” But Ethan suddenly smiled. “Just kidding. I do.” Though he said the words, I could see nothing but absolute coldness behind his smile. After the reception, Ethan got completely wasted. On their wedding night, Amber was left alone in an empty room. Worse, by the next morning, rumors spread on Ins that Ethan had slept with one of the bridesmaids. I had been following Ethan the whole time. I knew he was just drunk and slept alone in a hotel room. But Amber didn’t believe that. Furious, she confronted her bridesmaid and slapped her hard across the face. “I let you be my bridesmaid, and you seduce my husband?!” Her friend was bewildered and angry. “I didn’t do anything! What are you talking about?!” Amber didn’t want to hear it. She raised her hand to strike again, but this time, someone grabbed her wrist. Amber looked up in shock at Ethan—the husband who was supposed to be at home, now defending another woman. “What kind of crazy scene are you throwing here?” Amber saw the sheer disgust in Ethan’s eyes, and her heart sank. “Ethan, where were you last night? Were you with this bitch?!” Ethan shoved Amber’s hand away so hard she nearly fell. “Stop acting like a psychopath. Go home.” Without waiting for her, Ethan turned and walked away. For the first time, Amber was abandoned in public. And just like the day I was abandoned, it began to pour. I sat in the passenger seat of Ethan’s car, looking at his stern profile with a soft smile. “Thank you, Ethan. I know you’re doing this for me.” Ethan suddenly turned his head toward the empty seat and smiled. “Chloe, does this make you feel a little better?” I froze. Can he see me? I waved my hand in front of his face, but he just turned to roll up the window. Ah. He was just looking outside. He scared me for a second. From that day on, Ethan’s warmth toward Amber vanished completely. He started drinking, smoking, and giving her the silent treatment. Sometimes, he would even throw things at her. He wanted her to feel the terror and pain I felt. But Ethan, you shouldn’t do this. You shouldn’t ruin your own life for a ghost. At first, Amber thought she had done something wrong. She tried to please him and endured his outbursts. But gradually, she realized something was deeply off. One night, Ethan got drunk and called out my name in his sleep. That’s when she knew. Ethan had never let me go. She noticed Ethan was always staring at that old wooden box. One night, while he was asleep, she snuck over and opened it. But as she sifted through the items, Ethan appeared behind her like a shadow. “Drop those things.” Amber screamed in fright. With a loud clatter, the contents of the box spilled all over the floor. 4 “Ethan… you’re awake?” Ethan stared at the scattered items on the floor, his fists clenching so hard his knuckles turned white. “Who gave you permission to touch her things?” Panic seized Amber. She rushed forward to hug him. “Ethan, listen to me…” With bloodshot eyes, Ethan threw her off. Amber fell hard, her stomach slamming against the sharp edge of the coffee table. She gasped for air, cold sweat breaking out on her forehead. Ethan had completely lost his mind. I tried to pull him back, but my hands just slipped through him. I could only hover there, screaming in panic. Ethan lunged forward, wrapping his hands around Amber’s neck. “Why?! Why did you hide it from me?! She’s been dead for three years! Three years! And I thought… I thought she hated me!” Amber’s eyes began to roll back. Beneath her white silk nightgown, a dark red stain began to spread. I paced around them frantically, crying out. Ring—ring— The sudden blare of Amber’s phone snapped Ethan back to reality. He let go, completely indifferent, and wiped his hands with a towel. Amber crawled to her phone with the last of her strength and dialed 91

By the time Eleanor arrived at the hospital, Amber had already miscarried. Eleanor slapped Ethan across the face. “How could you let this happen?! She’s so fragile! What did you do to her?!” My heart ached as I looked at the red mark on Ethan’s cheek. Eleanor hit hard. I knew that pain too well. Whenever she slapped me, my face would swell for days. Ethan didn’t flinch. He just let out a cold chuckle. “Your slaps really do hurt.” Eleanor frowned. “Ethan, look at me! I am your mother-in-law! Have you lost your mind lately? You’re acting like a demon!” “The ones possessed by demons are you guys,” Ethan muttered cryptically. He didn’t want to stay in that suffocating room for another second. He turned and walked out. I wanted to follow him, but a strange curiosity kept me in the room. I wanted to see if Eleanor would actually show genuine love for her daughter. When Amber woke up, Eleanor held a cup of water, gently dabbing her dry lips with a wet cotton swab. I wanted to laugh. So, she did know how to take care of someone when they were sick. When we were kids, Amber always got cartons of fresh milk from Amazon, and I got nothing. One year, I had a 104-degree fever. My throat was so dry it felt like it was on fire. Seeing a half-empty glass of milk on the table, I couldn’t help but take a sip. Eleanor caught me and kicked me to the ground, screaming, “Who said you could drink that?! If you drink it, what is Amber going to have?! You’re a thief and an ungrateful brat!” Was I a thief, Mom? I never understood why you hated me so much over a single sip of milk. “Mom! My baby! My baby is gone!” Amber wailed, throwing herself into Eleanor’s arms. Eleanor patted her back gently, soothing her just like she did when Amber was a little girl. Sobbingly, Amber whispered, “Mom… Ethan knows. He knows Chloe is dead. What do we do? What if he never comes home?” Eleanor froze, the water cup trembling in her hand. “Does he only know she’s dead? Anything else?” Amber shook her head. “I don’t think he knows anything else.” Eleanor let out a huge sigh of relief. “Good. That’s good.” What did they mean by “anything else”? I realized they were talking about the truth behind my death. “It’s all that bitch’s fault! Even dead, she’s still ruining my life!” Amber hissed through gritted teeth, wishing she could dig up my bones and burn them. Eleanor whispered, “I’ll hire an occult medium to bind her soul so she can never haunt us again.” But I hadn’t done anything to them, had I? I couldn’t stand watching their touching mother-daughter moment anymore. I turned and floated away. If you hated me so much, Mom, why did you even give birth to me?

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