We were on a guided backpacking trip in the mountains, and as we settled down for the night, the guide announced that we only had one double tent and one single tent left. My boyfriend, Dustin, and my best friend, Bess, immediately claimed the double tent. Bess smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “Dustin snores like a chainsaw, Hannah. You’re such a light sleeper. I’ll take one for the team and crash with him so you can actually get some rest. Pretty good best friend, right?” Dustin merely scoffed and didn’t argue. He turned to me, his tone flat and reasonable. “Bess always hogs the blankets anyway. I don’t want you catching a cold.” Before I could even speak, the two of them were already tossing their gear inside. It was always like this. I was Dustin’s girlfriend, and Bess was my best friend. Yet they acted like they were the ones who shared a secret language, leaving me on the outside looking in. Every time they left me behind, they dressed it up as a favor. When they went tandem skydiving, they decided I was too afraid of heights, leaving me on the ground to watch them fly through the air, fingers locked tight. When we were submitting our college enrollment decisions, they decided I was too much of a homebody, convincing me to stay at the local state college while they both chose Emory University in Atlanta. Even when there was a “buy one, get one” deal at our favorite diner, they shared it and made me order separately because “Hannah has a bigger appetite anyway.” I looked into the tent now. Bess’s lace bra was draped carelessly over Dustin’s hiking pants. Suddenly, a wave of profound exhaustion washed over me. The sheer pointlessness of it all. I unlocked my phone and tapped on a message thread I had left unanswered. I typed a single line: “I accept. Yes.” The reply came almost instantly. “Hannah, I just changed your enrollment. See you at Emory.” … I locked my screen. Dustin’s voice startled me from behind. “Hannah, who are you texting? I called your name three times.” I turned off my phone casually. “Just a spam text.” He handed me a loaf of bread. “There’s only one camp chili meal left and a loaf of bread. You can’t handle spicy. Bess and I will take the chili.” My eyes dropped to the yellow packaging of the camp meal. It clearly said “Mild Tomato Pasta”. Inside the tent, Bess was already using Dustin’s personal titanium spork—the one I bought him when he got into the honors program—to taste if the food was hot. He had kept that spork for three years. He never let anyone else touch it. Except me. Until now. I didn’t take the bread. I turned toward the single tent. “No thanks. I brought my own food.” Dustin froze, his hand suspended in the air. He hadn’t expected me to refuse. Before he could say anything, Bess yelled from the tent, “Dusty! Help! I think I dumped too much salt in here!” He immediately turned, muttering under his breath but rushing to her side. “You’re so clumsy.” “Get out of the way, let me do it.” He expertly stirred the meal while Bess watched him, her eyes bright. “You’re a lifesaver, Dusty. If the cafeteria food at college sucks, I’m relying on you.” Dustin smiled, a soft, indulgent look on his face. “Like I’d ever let you starve.” I pitched my tent alone, sat inside, and pulled out a pack of dry crackers. I chewed slowly while studying the trail map for the rest of our hike. This trip was supposed to be our graduation trip. Just the two of us. But on the morning we left, Bess showed up at the trailhead, begging to come. I wanted to say no. We only packed supplies for two. She had nothing. But before I could speak, Dustin was already handing her his sun hat and trekking poles. Now, we were stretching two people’s worth of food for three. I had hinted a dozen times that Bess should head back, but Dustin always dismissed it, calling me petty and jealous of my own best friend. Suddenly, Bess zipped open my tent flap, dragging me outside. “Hannah! What are you doing in here all by yourself? The guide started the campfire. Let’s go!” When we walked out, I saw only one open spot next to Dustin—the camp stool where Bess had been sitting. Bess snapped her fingers. “Oh! Hannah, you sit there. I’ll go squeeze in next to the guide.” Dustin and I grew up together. Wherever he went, I was there. He always saved me a seat. But ever since Bess transferred to our school junior year, that seat had slowly drifted away. Dustin seemed to notice my look. He quickly asked a guy next to him to slide over. I said quietly, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll sit here.” I sat down next to a quiet girl I hadn’t talked to much. The camp game started: Truth or Dare. In the first round, the spinning water bottle pointed at Dustin. The guide smirks, looking between me and Dustin. “Alright, Dustin. When and where was your first kiss?” “Oh my god, starting strong!” someone laughed. Dustin’s eyes darted to me, but it’s Bess whose face turned bright red. “Wait, isn’t it Truth or Dare?” she stammers. “Shouldn’t he choose first?” The guide laughed. “Dustin never lies. Truth is way more fun.” Dustin’s face was flushed red. After a long pause, he closed his eyes. “Just now. In the tent.” The crowd erupted into hoots and hollers, their eyes bouncing between me and him. Bess shoved his shoulder, looking flustered. “Dustin, are you insane? Why would you say that out loud?” She turned to me quickly. “Hannah, don’t get the wrong idea! It was pitch black in there, we were setting up the sleeping pads, and we just bumped into each other. You know me—I only like pretty boys, Dustin is totally not my type!” The laughter died down. The atmosphere turned icy. Across the crackling fire, I caught the briefest flash of devastation in Dustin’s eyes. The guide whispered, “Wait, aren’t you guys dating? You aren’t in the same tent?” Everyone went quiet. Dustin was typing furiously on his phone. My phone buzzes: “Hannah, it was an accident. I’ll explain later. Just play along so it’s not awkward for everyone.” I locked my screen, looked up, and smiled. “I prefer having my own room.” Dustin let out a visible sigh of relief. The guide quickly cracked another joke to break the tension. Third round, the bottle pointed to Bess. She chose Dare. A guy suggested, “I heard there are wolves in these woods. Go out to the edge of the tree line and howl.” Before he even finished, Dustin threw his arm protectively in front of Bess. “No way. She’s terrified of wild animals. I’ll take the penalty for her.” He dropped to the dirt and started doing thirty push-ups. My body began to tremble. The girl sitting next to me noticed. She reached out and squeezed my hand. “Your hands are freezing. Are you okay? Why didn’t your boyfriend take the penalty for you earlier?” I bit my lip and shook my head. In the previous round, the bottle had pointed at me. I chose Dare. My dare was to go into the dark woods and collect ten dry branches. Dustin knew I was terrified of the dark. But he didn’t step in. While I was stumbling through the dark, crying silently as I gathered wood, he was busy washing wild berries for Bess. He hadn’t even noticed it was my turn. When the game ended and I returned to my tent, I realized my period had started. The hot water in my thermos was gone. My lower abdomen cramped painfully. I called Dustin. “Dustin, do you have any hot water? My period started.” There was a lot of noise on his end. Finally, his voice came through. “Hannah, just hold on a bit. Bess’s complaining that she needs hot water to wash her hair. I’ll boil some for you after I’m done helping her.” “Ow! Dustin, be gentle! You almost burned my scalp!” Bess’s voice squealed in the background. “If you keep squirming, I’m going to stop,” Dustin replied. “Fine, fine. But scratch a little higher… right there, it’s so itchy.” “Hey, you touched my ear! You know that’s my sensitive spot!” The call didn’t disconnect immediately, and their playful bickering echoed in my ear. A tear slipped down my cheek, hot and bitter. I couldn’t tell if it was from the physical pain or the ache in my chest. I waited until midnight, but Dustin’s promised hot water never arrived. I found some painkillers in my pack, swallowed them dry, and finally drifted off. The next morning, Bess burst into my tent. She saw the stain on my sleeping pad. “Oh, Hannah, did you get your period?” She immediately ran outside, shouting at the top of her lungs, “Dustin! Hannah got her period! Did you bring any pads?” Dustin finally remembered my call from last night. He walked over, looking thoroughly guilty, and crouched outside my tent. “I’m so sorry, Hannah. I was so exhausted last night, I just passed out.” My gaze fell on his collar. There was a single strand of pink, wavy hair clinging to the fabric. Bess’s hair. I was the one who went with her to dye it the day after graduation. My hands clenched into fists. The disappointment inside me hardens. Bess kept nagging. “Dustin, I’m talking to you! Go get her a pad!” Dustin looks even more sheepish. “I… I forgot it was that time of the month. I didn’t pack any.” Bess gasps. “How could you forget? You always remember when my period is! How did you forget Hannah’s?” My stomach twisted in another wave of pain. I remembered two weeks ago when Bess got her period. Dustin dragged me to the store, buying ten different brands of pads and tampons to stuff into her locker until it was practically overflowing. “Bess always borrows your stuff,” he had reasoned back then. “This way, she won’t have to take yours.” The next day was my birthday. He replaced the vinyl record he had promised me with a cheap, melted popsicle from the convenience store. “Sorry, Hannah,” he had whispered. “Buying all those supplies for Bess wiped out my allowance for the week. I’ll make it up to you when I save some cash, okay?” I had been hurt, but I couldn’t bear to make him feel bad. I put on a smile and let it go, just like he expected. After all, to them, I was always the soft, forgiving one. But Dustin used to keep my cycle saved in his calendar. He used to brew ginger tea for me before I even had to ask. When I was in pain, his eyes would well up with tears before mine did. When did I slip down his priority list, falling miles behind Bess? Realizing she misspoke, Bess quickly slaps her own mouth. “Hannah, don’t be mad. Dustin only looks out for me because of you. I’ll kick his butt for forgetting your stuff!” She reaches out to swat him, but Dustin grabs her wrist. “Stop messing around. Is your hand still blistered from the water yesterday?” He turned back to her. “I made breakfast. Go eat. I need to talk to Hannah.” Bess pouts, looking back at us three times before finally walking away. Once she’s gone, Dustin sighed. “Hannah, you’ve been upset this whole trip. Is it because Bess and I are going to Emory, leaving you here at State?” I said nothing. He continued his defense. “We talked about this. With your GPA, staying local is the best move. Besides, my mom loves you. Didn’t we agree we’d get married after college? If you stay here, you can visit her, help take care of her, and build a good relationship. It avoids any future mother-in-law drama. I’m thinking about our future.” He sounded so reasonable, so self-righteous. I wanted to laugh. He came from a single-parent home, and his mother had been bedridden for years. Every time I visited his house, I brought bags of groceries and expensive supplements. When he was busy studying, I was the one bathing his mother and changing her sheets. So that’s why he wanted me to stay behind. To be a built-in nurse. I interrupted his speech. “Did you make me breakfast?” Dustin choked on his words, stammering, “I… I thought you brought your own supplies, so I didn’t… and Bess didn’t bring anything, so I had to…” I closed my eyes, swallowing the bitter taste in my throat. “I sent you the updated trail map and itinerary,” I said coldly. “Give it to the guide to double-check.” Seeing how pale my lips were from the pain, Dustin quickly nodded. “Okay, Hannah. Wait for me, I’ll go boil some water for your stomach.” He ran off. But he didn’t return until camp was fully packed and we were ready to move. “Sorry,” he said, handing me a lukewarm thermos. “Emory sent over some pre-enrollment placement materials, and Bess was begging me to explain the math section to her. It took a few minutes.” I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it.” Maybe my cold tone bruised his ego. Usually, I’m the one who coos over him and softens first. Dustin scoffed, throwing the thermos at me. “Hannah, can you stop throwing tantrums for once in your life?” The heavy metal thermos hit my forearm, and I let out a sharp gasp of pain. I watched him walk away, catching up with Bess. They laughed and shoved each other as they walked down the trail. The boy I’ve loved for years, and my best friend. Left behind. Again. This time, I don’t flood Dustin’s phone with texts asking why he didn’t wait for me. I don’t complain to Bess about how thoughtless he’s being. I simply unpin both of their contacts from the top of my messages. When we’re about two-thirds through the hike, I notice something is wrong. I walk up to Dustin. “Why aren’t we on the path I mapped out?” Because we’re friends with the guide, Dustin and I volunteered to help manage the group. My job was navigation. But we’ve been walking for three hours since the last camp, and the terrain is completely wrong. We’re off-course. If we don’t stick to the trail, we’ll miss the designated supply station, and everyone will run out of water. Bess, oblivious to the danger, smiled. “Oh, I heard there’s a gorgeous wild lavender field near here, and I really wanted to see it. I asked Dustin to take a little detour.” I frowned. “No. Absolutely not.” Dustin stepped in front of Bess. “Hannah, high school is over. Can you stop being such a control freak? Bess just wanted to see the flowers. There’s nothing wrong with that.” Bess looked down, her voice trembling. “Hannah, I’m sorry, I didn’t know—” I looked straight at Dustin. “Explain it to the guide yourself.” I walked back to sit with the quiet girl from earlier. Two hours later, there was no lavender field. We were deeply lost. With supplies running low, tempers flared. “Who the hell wanted to see lavender anyway?” “Exactly! We’re out of water and we’re looking at flowers? Are you kidding me?” “Guide, I can’t go any further. I need to stop.” As hikers began collapsing onto the dirt, the guide had no choice but to call for an emergency rest stop. Then, the sky opened up. A sudden, violent mountain downpour. The ground began to shake, mud and rocks sliding down the steep slope above us. A landslide. “Run!” I screamed. “Landslide! Get to high ground!” A massive wave of yellow mud and debris crashed down the slope, fracturing our group. I looked wildly for Dustin and Bess. Suddenly, a hard shoulder slammed into me, throwing me to the muddy ground. It was Dustin. Without a single glance back, he scooped Bess into his arms and sprinted toward the safe ridge. I screamed his name, my voice cracking through the rain. He paused for a fraction of a second. But he didn’t turn back. The torrential rain blinded me. A massive boulder loose from the ridge was hurtling directly toward me. There was no time to move. I looked at his retreating figure, blurrier by the second, and closed my eyes… When I woke up, the first thing I saw was the blinding white of a hospital ceiling. Dustin was sitting by my bedside. The first words out of his mouth made my chest feel hollow. “Hannah, this has turned into a massive mess. The local news is here.” “Bess’s family doesn’t have the kind of connections yours does. You need to take the blame for the navigation error.” “Bess is traumatized. I bought two tickets to Thailand so we can go clear our heads. Just be a good girl, okay? Wait for me to get back.” Before I could answer, he opened the door and let the press in. “The person responsible for the hike has regained consciousness. You can go in.” Flashbulbs popped, and a wave of aggressive questions buried me. But as Dustin walked out, I whispered, “Dustin, we’re done. It’s over.” He didn’t even pause. He shielded Bess with his arm and hurried down the corridor. The next day, my mother, who lived out of state, saw the news. She immediately arranged for a private medical transport to pick me up. When the door to my room opened, I gasped. “What are you doing here?”
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