The gaming god made me fall for him, then ran away. I thought he ran because he thought I was trash at the game, so I forced myself to go from a useless noob to an all-around god. I always thought I was the kind of person who got motivated for love. I never expected that he was with me because I looked like the first love he could never have, the one torn away from him by a rich family. I could not take even a second of that, so I was going to pack up and run. I was in an online relationship. He was a war god on the rankings. After I confessed that I was a guy, he suddenly vanished from the entire internet. But at the National Rising Star Championship, I watched him hold the trophy and give his acceptance speech with bright, unstoppable confidence. The strongest jungler, Ethan Hale. That short but intense love filled my mind, and I watched the video of him receiving his award on my screen as I swore to myself. So what if he was a gaming god? I could do it too. I practiced all kinds of things every day and got beaten down over and over, until I finally went from a useless noob to an all-around player. I became the hot prospect every major team fought over. I joined Team XYG because I wanted to crush him hard and step on him! I wanted to make him wipe his tears and regret it! I still looked forward to meeting him, so when I first joined Team XYG, I specifically got my hair styled into seductive red waves. The manager brought me to the training villa and introduced me to the members. I stared at him in shock. He had one arm half around my shoulders, acting like we were buddies, and the corners of his mouth lifted to show his teeth. He was smiling like he did not have a care in the world! “Captain Hale, not bad. You finally recruited a pretty all-around girl into the team.” No way, did he not recognize me?
“Ethan, are your eyes broken?” One sentence from Ethan Hale controlled the entire room for thirty seconds. No one said a word. The manager coughed lightly and said, “Ethan, this is the all-around fill-in guy who has been really popular online lately, Logan Reed!” The hand on my shoulder quickly pulled away. Ethan touched his head and smiled. “My mistake. Nice hair texture.” “Ethan Hale, I don’t like people touching me.” I pulled away coldly. I tilted my head up slightly, expressionless. Inside, I was screaming that damn Ethan Hale had not recognized me! That fake bastard! After a simple introduction and handover, I stayed at the training villa. Team XYG’s support had retired due to injury, and since I could fill every role, I joined the team smoothly. “Fight for Team XYG, and I hope more people will come to know you.” At the welcome meeting, the manager bumped fists with us and spoke earnestly. Out of the corner of my eye, I secretly looked at Ethan. Ever since he found out I was a guy, his attitude instantly turned cold. Thinking about how intimate his touch had been when he thought I was a girl, my heart went cold in an instant. Then why did he make me fall for him and date me? The more I thought about it, the more wronged I felt. Wait, did he disappear from the internet because he liked girls?! Thinking of all the effort I had put in day and night, it turned out I was the clown!
The next day, the newcomer had to livestream for the team. Everything was rushed, and the team manager had not arranged a proper spot for me. “I’ll just find any chair and sit.” I casually pulled over a chair and sat beside the top laner. “Sit over here with me. There’s more space.” Ethan took the initiative to pull the chair out, and the two-person desk was spacious. I did not expect… that he would let me sit beside him. During those few short steps over, my heart almost jumped out of my chest. Ethan Hale, I forgive you for not recognizing me. “Ace, pinch me. Am I seeing things? Didn’t Ethan always use a single desk and never let anyone touch his stuff?” “Are you trying to kill me? Why did you pinch so hard? I don’t understand Ethan’s move either.” “You know Ethan is easy to get along with usually, but he is actually pretty serious about his personal belongings.” Listening to the chatter around me, my heart felt sweeter than honey as I sat in the chair. My ex, honestly, you are way too in love with me. “Logan, tie your hair up so it doesn’t affect your play. Girls online really seem to like your type,” the team manager suggested. I casually tied my red waves into a ponytail. Then I tucked my hair behind my ears. Team XYG had quite a lot of fans, and as soon as the livestream started, people flooded into the room like crazy. In just two minutes, the number of online viewers reached forty thousand. “Whoa, so handsome, so handsome!” “Hubby!! I want to have your babies!!” I smiled and waved at the fans. “Hi, everyone! I’m Team XYG’s support. Nice to meet you!” Once the popularity was high enough, the team manager also took out the question cards prepared in advance. “Welcome, Logan. We’re very curious why you joined a team to play professionally.” A classic question. Thinking back to the day he vanished from the entire internet, anger piled up in my chest. “It was because my ex dumped me for being bad at the game, so I worked hard to go pro and prove myself to him.” The whole screen filled with comments calling me lovesick. Looking at the fans’ crazy comments, I quickly tried to salvage it. “I’m joking, just livening up the mood. I’m super strong in real life, so how could I get dumped?” The team manager muted three people who started calling me a hopeless romantic. He shifted the topic to the other team members, and only then did he control the situation. Luckily, Ethan had gone out with a cigarette between his fingers and did not see it. I could not exactly talk trash about the person involved while he was wandering right in front of me…
“Play two friendly matches with random matchmaking.” We entered the game interface and confirmed the start. After selecting heroes and loading in, I saw a familiar ID on the other side. It was Ethan. “What do I do? I want both my husbands to win!!” “Looks like Logan is done for. I haven’t watched Ethan stream in ages!” “Don’t cry if Ethan crushes you. Come into my arms.” Crushed by him? They were really underestimating me a little.
I had studied his match videos many times and had long since become familiar with his playstyle. In less than ten minutes, I pushed towers all the way and smiled humbly while looking at the perfect victory on the screen. Sorry, I am a gaming god now too! I secretly pressed down the corner of my mouth that wanted to rise and put my hands on my hips in my heart with wild joy. My ex is only this good?! Watching the barrage fill with mockery and doubt toward him made me feel even better. On the surface, I still had to maintain team harmony. “Thank you, Ethan, for giving me my first win and letting me show everyone my skills.” The floating spaceship gift in the comments rose into the sky, and brilliant fireworks exploded across the screen. He sent that to me… did he still love me? While my thoughts ran wild, I saw his message appear in the public chat. “Duo with me.” The game invitation popped up right after. We could duo again. I was instantly thrown back into our ambiguous days. Who would understand? My ex had taken the initiative to invite me to play, and I had to hold back the urge to grin too wildly.
I hung above his head and healed him like crazy, while he killed like crazy, and we shoved down three towers in eight minutes. I looked at the message he sent. “Stay close to me.” “Don’t smile so hard, you look too in love.” “I now suspect Logan likes Ethan.” The comments flew everywhere, and fast-handed netizens had already finished making reaction memes. The meme of my lovestruck face had already started spreading. Team XYG chat. “We’re set. We will definitely win the Korean tournament,” the team manager wrote. The top laner, Zane, spammed the group with my lovestruck meme and wrote, “Look at Ethan’s unbeatable charm!” “By the way, Logan, are you really playing professionally for your ex? Don’t be a hopeless romantic. If you’re going to fall for someone, it has to be Ethan,” mid laner K teased. The truth was always said out loud as a joke. Ethan went straight for the face and admitted, “I’m the ex.” In less than a minute, only the two of us were left in the six-person group chat.
I had just shut down my computer when the door was locked from the inside. The four of them surrounded me and forced a confession. “Did you two really date?” “Are you the simp or the first love?” Simp? First love? Their eyes were full of curiosity and probing. I was just about to spill our entire dating diary and the fact that he had made me fall for men. Then there was a knock on the door. “Are you all that free?” Ethan stood at the doorway. The three cowards left, and he stood at the door. I opened my mouth and really wanted to ask him why he had vanished from the internet. The words choked in my throat and stopped there. “Don’t you owe me an explanation?” I looked at the man pressing his lips together coldly. I could not see through his heart. As long as he… explained to me and told me clearly why he left without a word, or if something had stopped him… “This hair color is pretty seductive. You haven’t changed.” Ethan looked me over. I stood there nervously. No, wait, I was clearly supposed to judge him… but it had turned into me waiting for his explanation. “That’s it?” I frowned and waited for him to ask to get back together. “Your skills have improved a lot. Your hair would go well with a dress.” After Ethan said that, he left behind a “get some rest early” and walked away. I watched his back disappear down the hallway. A dress?! I went back to my room distractedly and kept turning those words over in my head. Did he really like women?! I had rehearsed the scene of our reunion in my mind so many times… But I had never imagined he would be cold.
Because our relationship had been exposed, we went straight into zero contact. Everyone focused on training for the upcoming matches, and he always stayed in his room without coming out. My plan to chase my ex finally made a little progress again. At noon, he ordered food for us. K quickly opened the food, and his eyes lit up. “Ethan, there’s a chicken drumstick today!” One hand quickly took the meal away and placed it in front of me. “Were you starved in a past life? This is for Logan.” K wailed, “Ethan, I haven’t eaten a chicken drumstick in ages.” Seeing that K was craving it, I gave him the drumstick. “Eat it. You’re practically drooling.” Ethan frowned as he looked at a certain someone’s sharp collarbones. “Team XYG doesn’t have a habit of starving people. Eat more.” As the gossip spectator, Zane clicked his tongue. “Tsk, tsk. I think old flames are burning again. Tsk, tsk.” The chicken drumstick returned to my bowl. My chase-my-man diary had progress again, and this meal tasted so sweet! “Captain Hale definitely likes women. If I were a girl, I would absolutely win him over!” Bang. Then came the sound of coughing. Tomorrow afternoon, Team XYG had a friendly match against Team Dragon God. Zane and K both cheered me on and told me to target mid lane tomorrow. K quietly looked back, and Zane quickly locked the door, both looking as if facing a great enemy. “The first love Captain Hale likes is someone from Dragon God.” That one sentence froze me for a full minute, and my mind went foggy. Was I the simp? Or was I the clown? “But we’re all rooting for you. Smash Dragon God and steal Captain Hale back home as your trophy wife!” I wanted to go home… so it turned out all of this had been my own willing delusion… The grievance that had built up for so long burst at the slightest touch. Tears fell without even telling me first.
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