After a night of passion, my childhood friend thoughtfully prepared a morning-after pill for me. I held his wrist and pouted, “The pill is bitter. I don’t want to take it. If I get pregnant, let’s just get married.” Hearing this, Jack patted my head and chuckled, “Don’t be silly. Having a baby is much more bitter than taking a pill.” “Besides, I’m getting engaged on Sunday. Whose child would it be if you had one?” I froze on the spot. Jack kissed my forehead casually, coaxing me, “Be good, Aria. Pack up your things and take them with you later. We can’t play like this anymore.” “My wife wants me to be faithful.” Hearing this, I numbly threw my things into the trash can and then called my father. “I’ll marry him.” “To be honest, I’m used to having you around.” “How many years have we known each other? Since elementary school until now?” Even as Jack held me in his arms, I couldn’t stop the chills running through my body. Jack and I had known each other for sixteen years and had been sleeping together for eight. Five minutes ago, he was trembling, desperate to become one with me. I thought we were in love. Although we never said it out loud, I always believed we had an unspoken understanding. I had long considered us to be in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. But I never expected… was I just a friend with benefits? The morning-after pill stuck in my throat, too bitter to swallow. “Want to go another round?” Jack gently pushed me back onto the bed. The pink bedsheet was the one I had put on yesterday when Jack carried the mattress. At that time, he joked, “We’re like an old married couple.” Now, my heart was in shambles. “We’ve already taken the pill, might as well not waste it,” he said. “Let’s make this a perfect ending to our wild youth.” I instinctively pushed against Jack’s shoulder. “You just said… you’re getting engaged?” Jack grabbed my wrist excitedly, his attractive voice penetrating my ears. “I wanted to tell you earlier, but a certain little glutton was too eager to satisfy her hunger and shut me up~” “Rachel’s back. She said she still wants to marry me.” Rachel Zhou, the class beauty who confessed to Jack at our high school graduation ceremony and was rejected. The person Jack punished himself with three drinks for not wanting to mention. They’re getting engaged?! Jack, oblivious to my shock, enthusiastically shared with me. “I checked, and the earliest auspicious date is this Sunday!” “Rachel doesn’t have many old friends abroad, so you can help her fend off drinks at the engagement party and be her bridesmaid at the wedding.” As he spoke, he seemed to remember something and took out an invitation card from the bedside table. “Rachel said I should design the wedding invitation, but I don’t understand you girls’ tastes.” “Be a good girl, Aria, and give me some advice.” Twenty minutes ago, what he took out of that drawer was the morning-after pill that was now bitter in my throat. The white invitation card was low-key yet elegant, with Jack and Rachel’s initials intertwined like a pattern. It was clearly an expensive, carefully designed piece. Jack had long decided to marry Rachel, preparing for their wedding while entangled with me in bed. The immense anger made my whole body tremble. “Jack, you’re letting me look at your wedding invitation with another woman while I’m in your bed?” I tore the invitation into pieces in two swift moves. “You’re getting engaged, getting married, so what the hell am I?” “Aria Lin! Are you crazy?! Why did you tear up my invitation?!” Jack was busy picking up the pieces, not noticing my expression at all. Seeing me get out of bed to get dressed, he grabbed my arm. “What are you throwing a tantrum for?! Am I not supposed to get engaged or married? Do you expect me to play around with you forever?! I don’t even like you!” After shouting, he seemed to realize he had gone too far. He frowned at me, his voice dry: “I’ve always treated you as my best friend, close enough to share everything, my childhood sweetheart…” He said this, but his hand let go of me as if touching garbage. His expression returned to his usual nonchalance, tilting his head to look at me teasingly: “Or are you saying my charm is so great that you’ve unknowingly fallen head over heels for me?” “Aria, don’t scare me.” Jack pretended to be calm, but his panicked eyes betrayed him. That fearful look of being saddled with responsibility made me laugh bitterly, laughing until my eyes burned. This made him even more panicked, and he turned his back to me to get dressed. “Aria, we’ve been the best of friends since we were kids. You crying like this makes it seem like I’ve bullied you.” “We’re in an age of gender equality now. Don’t be so old-fashioned, it’s not interesting!” He finished dressing and turned to leave: “Rachel’s flight has arrived. I’m taking her to a hotel tonight.” “Pack up your things, especially all those cheap identical knick-knacks you bought. Take them all with you, don’t leave any for me.” The last thing he said to me before closing the door was: “We can’t play like this anymore. It’s not fair to Rachel.”
It wasn’t until the door had been slammed shut for a while that the frantic vibration of my phone brought me back to reality. In our old high school class group chat, Jack had dropped a bombshell: [The class president is back in the country. Party at the old spot tomorrow! Everyone must come! @all] The accompanying picture showed two happy faces close together, Jack kissing Rachel’s hand. Below were a flurry of curious comments, [Jack! Even if the class president hasn’t been back for years, you don’t need to be this enthusiastic!] [Did I wake up in a parallel universe?! Since when can you kiss the class president?!] Many people even tagged me. [Aria, come to the front row to watch, your childhood friend has strayed!] At our graduation party when we were eighteen, Rachel publicly confessed to Jack. The girl on one knee, full of hope, was only met with Jack’s scornful laugh. “Are you misunderstanding something, my dear class president?” “It’s not Chinese New Year yet, I haven’t prepared any red envelopes!” Seeing Rachel’s reddening eyes, Jack turned away and put his arm around my shoulder: “I have my little Aria here, that’s enough for a lifetime! We’re getting married after college! None of you are allowed to miss it! You all better bring wedding gifts!” Rachel stood up and slapped me hard across the face before running away in tears. Thinking back now, his reddened eyes at that time weren’t out of concern for me, but probably worry that Rachel’s hand might hurt. Just then, Jack sent another voice message: “I can’t kiss the class president, but I can kiss my fiancée.” “I’m getting engaged to Rachel.” Instantly, all the comments tagging me disappeared like the wind. Only a flood of congratulations remained. Someone else joked, [Looking at the background, a night of passion is worth a thousand gold (dog emoji)] Jack replied almost immediately, “Get lost! Don’t make such jokes!” His tone was serious, full of protection. I suddenly thought of myself. At a class reunion six months ago, a guy in our class asked about my performance in bed. I got angry and argued with him. But Jack said I was no fun, “We’re all classmates, don’t take jokes so seriously.” It turns out, he just didn’t care. As I smiled bitterly, Rachel posted in the group: [Getting legally married on Sunday, law-abiding citizens doing things by the book (sunglasses emoji)] Everyone quickly followed suit, offering congratulations. Rachel then actively tagged me, [Aria, I’m sorry. Eight years ago, Jack used you as a shield, which led to me slapping you. Now you’re being joked about because of us again.] [Jack said you volunteered to be my bridesmaid, thank you! See you tomorrow, old classmate!] I was still wondering what she meant by “shield” eight years ago when Jack’s messages came flooding in. [Aria! Why are you pretending not to see?] [Can we not bring up ancient history?] [Rachel just got back, and you’re already trying to put her in an awkward position?] [Reply quickly!] The messages came one after another, piercing my heart without giving me a chance to breathe. Finally, he dropped one last message, [If you don’t want to reply, forget it!] Then he tagged me in the group again, [Don’t party too hard, remember to take the morning-after pill (dog emoji)] Rachel quickly followed up with, [I guess all those years abroad were wasted, I’m not as open-minded as Aria (covering mouth laugh emoji)] I was about to reply when I realized I had been muted by the group admin, Jack. Overwhelmed with anger, I called Jack. After a few seconds of connecting, it was Rachel’s voice that came through. “Jack, when you rejected me back then, did you really think I couldn’t compare to Aria?” Jack’s familiar tone answered without hesitation, “Aria? I never even thought of her as a woman.” “At that time, my dad’s company was in trouble. I didn’t know if my family could recover, so I couldn’t bear to let you suffer with me. I had to find an excuse to make you give up, and I didn’t want to mess around with other girls.” “But now all that’s in the past. I can support both of us now.” “Rachel, I’m never letting you go for the rest of my life.” After a rustling sound of kissing, Jack said tenderly, “Let’s wait until we’re legally married. We have a lifetime together, there’s no rush.” “I don’t want to wrong you without making things clear.” I abruptly hung up the phone. At the graduation party, Jack had drunk too much. A few classmates carried him to a hotel. I was afraid to leave him alone, so I stayed to take care of him. In the small hotel room that cost $30 a night, Jack pulled me into his arms. The next day, seeing the bloodstain on the sheets, he slapped himself hard. “I’m sorry.” At the time, I thought that “I’m sorry” was for me. Now I realize it was probably for Rachel. Sorry for rejecting her. Sorry for sleeping with me. I wiped away the cold tears on my face and called a moving company. It only took a few hours to clear out the room I had spent years decorating. Watching the garbage truck drive away, I left the spare key in the shoe cabinet. My parents divorced when I was young, and I was tossed back and forth like a soccer ball. If there’s any advantage to that, it’s probably that I can quickly accept all heartbreaking things. No matter how much my heart hurts, I can force myself to act like nothing’s wrong. Closing the door, I called my dad. “I’ll agree to marry that disabled person you mentioned.” “Consider it repaying the debt I owe you.”
Back when Jack’s family was in decline, I secretly begged my estranged father to help them out. At that time, I promised I would definitely repay this debt. Three months ago, my dad’s company faced a crisis and urgently needed a large sum of money to keep operating. “Either you get that Jack to pay back the money! Or you obediently go through with this business arrangement marriage to get the money!” “If the Zhang family in Beijing wasn’t desperate because of his disability, how could they look at a good-for-nothing like you! Throwing yourself at men! I’ve told you before, all men are ungrateful dogs!” Several times when my dad called asking for money, Jack was right beside me. I thought he couldn’t hear. Now I know, he was just pretending. Just then, a new post popped up on SnapChat. It was a photo Jack took of Rachel’s silhouette against a sky full of fireworks, looking exceptionally happy. [If I can’t pluck the stars for you, I’ll give you a starry sky. Welcome home, my princess.] There was a comment below with many likes: [A masterpiece of love by the fireworks master! Spending millions to make a beauty smile, Jack is so generous!] I suddenly remembered the month after Jack and I first slept together, on my 18th birthday, he bought me a sparkler. In the dim light, the boy’s face was full of sincerity, “Aria, when we get through these hard times, I promise I’ll show you the most beautiful fireworks in the world!” At that time, I didn’t know there was a little baby in my belly, nor did I know that after the hard times would come even harder times. In the hospital room, Jack looked at my pale face after the surgery, “I’m sorry, Aria. From now on, I’ll buy the most expensive contraceptives. I’ll never let you suffer again!” I should have woken up then. It’s all my fault. The memories scattered in the cold wind. I put my frozen red hands back in my pockets with my phone. The last message on my phone was from my dad. [You better behave yourself! The Zhang family is coming to pick you up tomorrow.] Dragging my suitcase, I plunged into the dark night. One last cry, and after dawn, Jack and I would have nothing more to do with each other. After a night of tossing and turning, I finally found a hotel to settle in. Just as I was falling into a light sleep, I was jolted awake by my phone ringing. Jack’s angry voice made my heart ache, “Where are you?” “Just because Rachel asserted her position in the group chat yesterday, you’re being this petty?” “Everyone’s coming to welcome Rachel back at the class reunion! Why do you have to be different from everyone else?” “Do we need to send a sedan chair to invite you?” “Just because you’re not coming, Rachel has been worried that you’re still holding a grudge about that slap!” “Come over quickly and explain clearly! Don’t let Rachel feel uneasy!” The once gentle voice was now full of impatience. I used to think I was the exception to Jack’s bad temper, but now that the real exception had returned, I realized I was just a self-deluded joke. But I don’t want to be a joke anymore. “Why should I go? What does it matter to me whether Rachel feels at ease or not?” “And who are you to order me around?” “Jack, in what capacity are you calling me? Do we have any relationship?” This was the first time I had ever snapped at Jack. My temper isn’t particularly mild, it’s just that in the past, I had covered my sharp edges with love. Jack was stunned for two seconds, then lowered his voice, “Aria, are you jealous now? What’s the point?” “I told you we were just playing around, you have no right to be jealous!” “Besides, Rachel and I are serious. No matter how much you make a fuss, it’s useless.” “Aria! I’m begging you! Can you not cause trouble for me?!” I hung up the phone directly and started to get ready. The Zhang family was coming to pick me up today. My mom always taught me when I was little that if I agreed to be a bargaining chip, I should be a bargaining chip worth having. I was planning to go downstairs to wait for the Zhang family, but unexpectedly, I ran into Jack, Rachel, and a group of old classmates in the hotel lobby. Rachel grabbed my arm, smiling, “I was wondering why Jack suddenly wanted to change the location, turns out Aria was waiting here!” “I knew Aria wouldn’t refuse Jack. Not replying to messages was just to make a surprise appearance and get extra attention from old friends, right?” After eight years apart, Rachel’s gaze on me still felt like a hook, scrutinizing, “Disappearing for a night was to get all dressed up, huh? People might think you’re really trying to compete with me for today’s leading role!” Rachel’s nails dug into my wrist as she forcefully pulled me into her arms, as if for a long-awaited reunion hug, but whispered in my ear, “Looks like yesterday didn’t make you back off. You couldn’t hold onto Jack for eight years, now you’re just making a fool of yourself by being clingy.” With that, Rachel suddenly pushed me hard, making me fall heavily to the ground.
The high heels I was wearing twisted my ankle badly, with a slight cracking sound that instantly covered me in cold sweat. Three years ago, Jack had a high fever in the middle of the night, right when there was a power outage in our neighborhood. I carried Jack, who was two heads taller than me, down eight floors, and missed a step, twisting my ankle. The doctor said I must never injure that ankle again, or I might end up with a permanent disability. The pain now was even worse than that year. As I fell, my phone flew to the side, now flashing on and off. My voice trembled with pain, “Jack, call an ambulance for me.” The Zhang family’s son I was supposed to marry was missing a leg, and I didn’t want to end up disabled too. I pleaded with Jack. He rushed towards me urgently, but just as he got close, Rachel hugged him around the waist. Rachel’s eyes were red as if she had suffered a great injustice and shock. “I… I didn’t!” She looked at Jack with teary eyes. “Jack, I didn’t!” “I really didn’t push Aria! I don’t know why she pulled me down with her!” As she spoke, large tears fell from her eyes, crying pitifully, “I did slap Aria before, but this time I really didn’t.” “How can I prove myself? How can I make you believe me!” “Jack, I’m so stupid, please tell me, how can I prove it?” The old classmates watching behind whispered among themselves, “Putting on a show of framing someone as soon as they meet?” “On the way here, Rachel was saying she was worried Aria might still hold a grudge about that slap from before, afraid of something like this.” “Guess she was right!” “Even if they’re childhood friends, it doesn’t matter! Jack has a girlfriend now! Who does she think she is to be so possessive!” Jack held Rachel tightly in his arms, “You don’t need to prove anything, I’ll always believe you unconditionally.” Then he frowned and gave me a cold look as I lay there unable to move due to my twisted ankle. “Aria, stop acting! Aren’t you ashamed?!” “I didn’t…” The slightest movement brought another wave of dull pain. Jack laughed coldly, interrupting me. “I thought I knew you well enough.” “But Rachel’s right, men can never imagine how cruel women can be to each other.” “Just because Rachel slapped you once eight years ago, you’re sure everyone will believe it’s her hurting you again.” “Not answering calls, playing disappearing acts, showing up all dressed up, and now using such a low trick. Aria, doing this only makes me feel disgusted with you.” I could only grit my teeth and explain, “It’s not like that, I’m here waiting for my fiancé…” Rachel cried even more heart-wrenchingly, and in her emotional state, she even made to kneel down to me, “Aria! I admit it!” “If you say I did it, then let’s say I pushed you! I’ll kneel down and apologize, okay!” “I’m begging you! Please don’t try to steal my Jack.” “I care about everything else, but I only want Jack. Please, give him to me!” I understood there was no hope in relying on them, so I could only painfully crawl towards my phone. Just as my fingertips touched the phone, Jack forcefully stepped on the screen. “Acting so real, you’ve lost all sense of shame, you should be nominated for an Oscar!” “Want your phone? Apologize to Rachel first.” I futilely pushed at Jack’s ankle, “I’m really not acting! You forgot my foot was injured before?” “I’m not lying either! I really am waiting for my fiancé!” “I never thought about competing with Rachel for you!” But these words only made Jack angrier, his eyes filled with a disgust I had never seen before. “You can even say you have a fiancé!” “You just have to bring up how you were injured for me in front of Rachel, don’t you? You just have to air everything between us for everyone to know, right!” “Fine! Aria, you asked for this!” Jack crushed my phone under his foot, ignoring my pain as he grabbed my collar to face everyone, “Rather than let you spread lies, I might as well tell the truth myself!” “Yes, I did sleep with Aria for eight years!” “But I never said I would marry her! From the beginning to the end, Rachel was the only one in my heart!” “I rejected Rachel back then because I was afraid she would suffer with me! That’s why I had Aria act out a play with me! Aria was the one who took it seriously and deluded herself!” Amidst the shocked gasps of the onlookers, Jack grabbed my clothes and slapped me hard across the face. “Now I’m the one slapping you, so hate me if you want!”
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