For a moment, everyone in the room held their breath and turned to look at me. I smiled faintly. After a brief pause, I broke the silence. “Go on, don’t ruin the game’s atmosphere.” * On Lily’s birthday, the private room was filled with college classmates. I sat on the sofa, dressed in a crisp suit. My girlfriend, Lily, was singing a love song with her close male friend. “Jack, when are you going to marry our Lily?” her friend teased from the side. I was about to speak when I witnessed a scene I’ll never forget. My girlfriend and her best guy friend were locked in a tight embrace. “Kiss, kiss!” the college classmates cheered in unison. Their attention had been drawn to another event – Lily and Ryan’s game. Lily had lost, and the loser had to kiss the other person. This rule was, of course, suggested by Ryan. Ryan was Lily’s ex-boyfriend and her longtime crush. He had suddenly reappeared in recent years as her “best guy friend,” clearly with ulterior motives. “This… doesn’t seem right,” Lily feigned reluctance, but her eyes were full of anticipation as she looked at Ryan. Ryan returned her gaze with equal intensity. Their eyes met, filled with affection. “Come on, guys, don’t you see her boyfriend is here?” Ryan looked at me with a victorious smile. Everyone in the room held their breath and turned to look at me. With a smile on my face, I broke the silence: “Go on, don’t ruin the game’s atmosphere.” “Look at Jack, he’s so cool about it. That’s the kind of boyfriend you should have!” Lily’s friends, eager to stir up drama, cheered again. I couldn’t be bothered to watch them and drank alone. “He said he doesn’t mind, let’s continue,” Ryan said smugly. Lily, however, was somewhat shocked, unable to believe I had said those words. Then she became a bit angry, glaring at me: “Jack, I’ll deal with you when we get home!” Eventually, the two of them kissed passionately. “Wow!” The people around immediately began to cheer. My mind was in chaos, recalling everything that had happened in the past. The nervousness when I first confessed to her, the joy when she accepted me, the caution I took in our relationship. Her smile, her tears. They never truly belonged to me. What’s borrowed must eventually be returned. It’s just a pity about my two years of devotion. I sighed deeply, my eyes full of disappointment. I knew this was a moment Lily had been waiting for a long time. Lily, you must be very happy right now. The feeling of getting what you’ve always wanted must be nice. Just like when I successfully pursued you. Unfortunately, it’s all over now. A woman who doesn’t love me isn’t worth keeping. From that moment on, I made a decision in my heart. To take back all my love. “Jack, what’s wrong with you today!” my girlfriend pretended to be angry after the party. Indeed, she was still such a good actress. She had clearly crossed a line, yet she was pushing the responsibility onto me. In fact, she didn’t care about me now, even if she might have in the past. I had known this for a long time, I just didn’t want to believe it. During college, Lily was charming, lively, and cheerful. Her smile was enough to make anyone fall for her. She excelled in arts and literature, was the president of the dance club, had a perfect figure, and consistently ranked at the top of her class. Such a girl could be said to be flawless. She was proud, beautiful, talented, and pure. Suitors lined up for her, and I was one of them. From the first time I saw her in freshman year, I fell deeply in love with her at first sight. To make her notice me, I studied hard to improve my grades. I learned calligraphy and dance just to have common topics with her. I constantly kept track of Lily’s news, trying to impress her time and time again. I never stopped sending her bubble tea, snacks, and fruits. I gave her countless designer bags and necklaces. All I hoped for was for her to look at me once. But she returned all the gifts. Of course, how could the universally acknowledged campus goddess change her mind for a few gifts? She was so proud, and that’s exactly what I loved about her. But she didn’t even see me. At that time, she was confident and radiant, only interested in one person. That person was Ryan, the universally acknowledged campus heartthrob. During college, Ryan was handsome, academically outstanding, and represented the school in many competitions. He could sing and dance, and played the guitar well. Whenever he appeared at school events, he would inevitably draw screams from countless girls. He even had his own fan club called “The Wind Chasers.” With so many admirers, Ryan could be considered a campus celebrity. No wonder Lily was infatuated with him. One was the campus heartthrob, the other was the acknowledged talented beauty, they were indeed a perfect match. Lily persistently pursued her crush, and when Ryan broke up with his girlfriend, Lily seized the opportunity and made her move. Finally, on the first Valentine’s Day of sophomore year. Ryan accepted Lily’s confession. This golden couple, famous throughout the school, officially started dating. And I, holding a bouquet of flowers ready to confess to Lily, could only stand aside, heartbroken. Becoming a complete bystander. The news of campus heartthrob Ryan dating dance club beauty Lily quickly spread to every corner of the campus, becoming a beautiful story of college life. Unfortunately, good times didn’t last long. Although Ryan was good-looking, he was extremely flirtatious. He flirted around, and Lily soon found out. On her birthday, Lily cried her eyes out. She took the cake to the rooftop, where she happened to meet me studying for exams. I showed her great care and concern. Every day I was busy taking care of her, bringing her tea and water. Finally, I won the goddess’s approval. Lily became my girlfriend. At first, she was indifferent to me and wouldn’t allow me any intimate gestures; I didn’t force it, thinking at the time that being goddess Lily’s boyfriend was already very satisfying. I treated her like a treasure, loving her dearly. I cared for her meticulously, took her traveling to cheer her up, went out for meals and shopping. No matter how busy work was, I would always keep her informed. I came home on time every day to cook, treating her like a princess. Slowly, she started to accept me. She asked about my joys and sorrows, smiled at me, and even started to care about my preferences. I believe that during that time, she did love me. But love that comes from begging is ultimately hard to last. Nourished by love, I became even more motivated. I worked hard and strived to improve my performance. I wanted to buy our own marital home through my efforts, truly giving her a warm home. I even imagined countless times having a child with her in the future. A family of three, three meals a day, four seasons a year. Living happily together. Everything seemed so beautiful then. I felt like I was in a dream, but finally, one day, I woke up. Her prince charming had returned. Ryan mysteriously appeared in our city, in Lily’s life. On the street, they exchanged a glance. With just that one look, I knew Lily’s heart no longer belonged to me. But I still couldn’t let her go, couldn’t let go of these years of being together day and night. I could only deceive myself, maintaining this relationship that existed in name only by pretending to be deaf and blind. Gradually, she started coming home late and leaving early, exchanging flirtatious messages with Ryan, showing annoyance at my care, and dressing up meticulously. Looking at Lily in the mirror, I knew I had lost. We had been together for two years, and to please her, I had given her countless expensive pieces of jewelry, clothes, and bags. But she had never seriously dressed up for me, telling me we were family and didn’t need to care too much about appearances. Now I realize, she probably thought I wasn’t worthy. A woman dresses up for the one she loves, and I was clearly not that person. The only one she cared about was Ryan. I struggled on, unwilling to give up, telling myself she was just wavering, that if I was good enough, she would surely change her mind. Until that birthday party when she kissed Ryan. I knew then that it was time to wake up from my dream. That night when we got home, I ignored Lily. I walked straight to the living room and slept on the couch. “Bang!” A loud door slam echoed through the house. Lily was clearly angry. She didn’t understand why her number one admirer suddenly stopped admiring her. In fact, it was simply because I no longer loved her. Love is just like that. When I loved you, you were the flowers, the sea, the wind, the clouds, all the beauty in the world. When I no longer love you, you’re just you, with no relation to me. I slept soundly that night, free from the troubles of love, my mind suddenly became much clearer. It was the most peaceful sleep I’d had in a long time, not having to worry about Lily being unhappy, not having to endure her bad temper, not having to fear Ryan taking her away. I only needed to consider whether I was happy. The next morning when I woke up, Lily had prepared breakfast. At the table, she kept staring at me. I ate silently. The food she made was still terrible. Just because she said doing housework would age her quickly, I had taken on almost all the household chores over the years. She only focused on enjoying life and staying beautiful. Back then, I thought life was good and peaceful. Now thinking about it, it just seems ridiculous. “Jack, don’t you have anything to say to me?” Lily interrupted my thoughts. She couldn’t hold back anymore. She was the goddess, and in her view, the fact that she personally cooked for me was already a great favor. I should naturally be overjoyed and obediently follow her lead. Answer her question, and then beg for forgiveness. I knew she wanted to ask why I didn’t care yesterday. But none of it mattered anymore. I didn’t want to waste words. “The food is a bit salty.”
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