When I transferred to this school, Parker had already dated every pretty girl here. He joked with his buddies, “I’d rather date a dog than Zoe.” I am Zoe. But a month later, his best friend cornered me and confessed his feelings. Seeing the marks on my body, Parker suddenly went crazy: “Who gave you permission to touch her?” “Um… could you please give this to Parker?” I took the light pink love letter. This was the eleventh one this month. Everyone knew I was Parker’s childhood friend, and they also knew he would like anyone but me. So they felt safe asking me to deliver love letters. But as usual, when Parker received it, he would raise an eyebrow, thinking about who the girl was, and then sneer: “My standards are not that low.” He threw the letter back into my arms: “I can’t accept someone on your level.” His buddies all laughed. And Parker’s eyes were filled with mockery when he looked at me. Why? Because the first love letter Parker tore up was mine.
Parker and I were childhood sweethearts. Our parents were close friends, so they naturally assumed we got along well too. At first, we did. Until a certain… accident. It was a game of Truth or Dare. Parker got dared, and someone asked if he dared to kiss me. At that time, we were naive but extremely competitive. He asked me, “Do you mind?” But before I could react, he kissed me. “Tch, it’s nothing special.” From that moment on, I was no longer the untouchable flower or the top student in everyone’s eyes. Instead, I became one of Parker’s possessions.
Parker’s grades were not good. Because of this, his parents hoped I could study with him. But on the day we agreed to go to the library together, I stood alone at the bus stop waiting for him for nearly an hour, only to see his SnapChat story about winning ten games in a row at an internet cafe. I took a taxi to that shady internet cafe. Inside, it was smoky, and there was even a girl sitting on Parker’s lap. They were cheering for him. He suddenly turned his head and met my gaze. Returning a malicious smile.
“Zoe, are you fucking insane!” Parker got scolded by his parents and had all his pocket money taken away. He couldn’t go to the internet cafe anymore because I told on him. “You shouldn’t go to places like that,” I said word by word. At that time, hiding my feelings for him, I stubbornly and self-righteously tried to be good to him. But what I got in return was his increasing disgust. Parker grabbed my chin: “What right do you have to control me?” “You really think you’re my girlfriend just because of one kiss? What a joke!”
Parker had a very handsome face. Coupled with his rebellious personality, he quickly attracted a lot of attention at school. Many girls wanted to win him over. He welcomed them all, flirtatious and heartless. Just playing basketball casually, his excellent skills would make the whole court cheer. But Parker was merciless, throwing the basketball hard and without hesitation at me. “Sorry.” He said carelessly, watching me hug my arm in pain, and apologized lightly: “You won’t hold a grudge against me, right? My little childhood sweetheart.” So, everyone knew he hated me.
I gradually accepted this fact. I carefully put away the love letter I had once written for Parker, stroke by stroke, with a girl’s heart, and stopped paying attention to his affairs. But in front of our parents, we still needed to pretend to have a good relationship. “Parker’s grades have improved recently, it must be thanks to little Zoe. I’ve cut some fruit, you two eat.” Parker’s mother smiled. Parker seemed to be in a good mood too. He just gave me a warning look discreetly. Of course, his improved grades were not my credit. It was because he had recently started dating the school beauty with excellent grades. They often “tutored” after school. If only I hadn’t caught them kissing in an empty classroom that day.
I had originally removed Parker from my world. But we were in the same school, seeing each other all the time. As the top student in our grade for years, I had just won the outstanding student award for the city and needed to give a speech on stage the next day. So I stayed behind after school a day early to rehearse with the teacher. I passed by that empty classroom. The sounds inside were faint and ambiguous. I just turned my head slightly and caught Parker’s eye through the gap in the curtains. He was pressing a girl against the desk. But in the moment he looked up, he caught me. At that time, I knew he had marked me down in his heart again.
The school beauty, Parker’s girlfriend, was consistently second in our grade and also my classmate. But after dating Parker, her grades began to visibly decline. This quickly caught the attention of the teachers. They called me over: “Has she been acting strange lately? Or is she in contact with any bad influences?” I just shook my head: “I don’t know.” But the truth couldn’t be hidden for long. Somehow, the fact that I was questioned spread. Parker and the school beauty’s affair was exposed, his parents found out, and his father, who had a violent temper, took him home and beat him. That day, no one was at my house. Parker barged into my room forcefully. “I underestimated you.” He pushed me, and I lost my balance, hitting the desk. The drawer fell out, along with its contents. Parker’s hand holding my wrist froze. Because we both saw the light pink love letter on the ground. It had my name and Parker’s on it. And he was all too familiar with my handwriting.
“Oh, so it was jealousy?” Parker had a look of sudden realization. He tore up that love letter, then grabbed me. I struggled: “I didn’t tell on you.” He raised an eyebrow: “Now there’s something more important than that.” Parker took the scissors from the desk and cut off a lock of my hair: “Zoe, I’d rather date a dog than you.”
Parker used that lock of my hair to make amends with the school beauty. But this couldn’t change his father’s decision to transfer him to another school. On the day Parker left, the school beauty cried for a long time. I thought they would be together forever. But it didn’t take long for the school beauty to receive photos of Parker being intimate with other girls. And my lock of hair, along with the missing part of my sideburns, were all forgotten. The school beauty’s grades later plummeted. She begged me to help her arrange a meeting with Parker, just once, she wanted to see him. I couldn’t refuse successfully. But I didn’t expect that on the day I went, Parker was drunk in a bar. He recognized me and forcefully kept me there. “Zoe, isn’t this what you wanted to see the most?” He smiled in a frightening way. So the next day, what the school beauty received were photos of Parker forcefully kissing me against the private room door.
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