Once again, I was beaten bloody by my unpredictable wife, Gwen. As I lay there, on the verge of being beaten to death, my adopted daughter didn’t shield me as she usually did. Instead, she sat nearby, casually counting money with a smirk on her face. It was the money I had saved for a house, penny by penny, from sweeping streets and collecting garbage. “Mom, don’t kill him yet,” she said. “While it’s still dark, let’s dump him on the road. If this cripple gets run over by a car, we might be able to scam some money.” The mother and daughter dragged me by my crippled right leg and threw me onto the road. As I lay dying, I desperately tried to crawl away. But my father, George, and my brother, William, came and dragged me back to the middle of the road. Through my blurry vision, I saw my adopted daughter hugging my father and brother, unable to contain her laughter. “Dad, once the cripple is dead, we can finally acknowledge our true relationship!” I widened my eyes in disbelief. Could it be that the abandoned child I had raised with such difficulty was actually the illegitimate daughter of one of them? Before I could understand the truth, a speeding truck ran me over. When I opened my eyes again, I had returned to the day I found my adopted daughter.
“Waa! Waa!” The familiar cry of an infant felt like a blunt knife scraping against my nerves. I coldly looked towards the bundle in the corner. In my previous life, I had picked up this ungrateful child because I felt sorry for her. To buy her formula, I walked 10 miles to the city. Because she wanted pizza, I worked through a three-day fever with my body shaking from chills. When she had diarrhea, I carried her through flood waters to the hospital. I slipped and broke my right leg, leaving me with a lifelong limp, but I had no regrets. I raised her with countless drops of blood and sweat. In the end, she pushed me into hell with her own hands. I stared at the bundle in the corner of the alley, my nails digging deep into my palms, almost drawing blood. Resisting the urge to strangle the little ingrate, I quickly ran back home with my backpack. I took a bite of the hard bread. Even though it scratched my throat, it tasted sweeter than honey. In this life, I hadn’t yet been hit by Gwen with a beer bottle, losing three teeth. I wouldn’t speak with a lisp or spill food while eating porridge. My elbow hadn’t been shattered, causing my hand to shake uncontrollably when holding things. My right leg was fine too. I wouldn’t have to crawl like a dog, dragging a crippled leg to pick up fallen bread from the ground. “Creak!” The door to the west room opened, and William came out rubbing his eyes. Seeing me eating, his eyes immediately widened. His voice rose, “Brother! How come you’ve come back empty-handed!” I slowly and deliberately spread a generous amount of lard on the bread. Life in the countryside was hard. I never dared to eat such good things as lard, saving it all for William and our father, George. All because of our grandfather’s instructions. He said that my father and brother had always been weak, and as the eldest grandson, I should take care of them more. So I worked like a tireless ox. In the countryside, I rushed to do all the dirty and tiring work for George and William. Under the scorching sun, I went to dry grain and weed for William. At night, I forced my aching back to carry manure for George. My hands were always covered in blisters. I was grateful if I could sleep four or five hours a day. I was always afraid they might catch a cold or get sick from the wind and rain. But in return, I was schemed against for a lifetime. I tilted my head back and took a big bite of the lard-covered bread. The rich oily fragrance slid down my dry throat. “I just went out to weed, of course I came back empty-handed,” I said, glancing at him inconspicuously and sneering. “What, did you expect me to bring back something dirty and unsavory? I can’t do that kind of profiteering!” William frowned angrily, rushed out, pulling back the curtain. There was a “clang” from the yard. William had kicked over the vegetable washing basin, shouting for dad.
George and William whispered for a while. Then they hurriedly left the house. Not long after, they started shouting dramatically in the yard. “Oh my! Whose child is this?” My father held the bundle with a pitying look. “Oh, poor baby! How could you be abandoned here?” He heard my footsteps and immediately turned to look at me. His eyes were so “kind” and “righteous” that he looked like a saint incarnate. “Lucas, come quick and see how pitiful this child is. We can’t just stand by and do nothing!” George rushed over in three quick steps and tried to shove the bundle into my arms, muttering, “Hurry and take the child to the village clinic.” “I don’t know how long this child has been abandoned. I see hoof prints on its body. Quick, go check if there’s anything wrong.” I glanced down. The bastard child born of an affair. Its face was purple-red, its cries weak, as if it might die at any moment. I desperately suppressed the cold laughter in my heart. In my previous life, George had persuaded me with this “saintly” face. He earnestly persuaded me to give up my chance to return to the city. To be stuck in this backwater village for a lifetime. For this bastard child, born of either him or William with some loose woman. My whole life was ruined! I suddenly stepped back, avoiding his hand, and spoke calmly. “Dad, my bones ache all over. I don’t want to go out.” George’s face immediately changed. “Lucas! How can you be so heartless?” he said, gritting his teeth and suppressing his anger, as if I were some unfilial son. “This child will die if no one takes care of it! Can you bear that?” “How have I taught you all this time? You must have a conscience in everything you do.” “Good deeds will be rewarded, and turning a blind eye to someone in need will have consequences!” William quickly joined in, pretending to persuade me. “Brother, don’t you always say you’re tired? Just bear with it for a bit. Saving a life is better than building a seven-story pagoda…” Ha! So he knew I was exhausted every day from working for him? I looked at George and William’s hypocritical, self-righteous faces and suddenly laughed. “Brother, you’re so kind. Why don’t you take the child to the clinic yourself?” “The money is in the drawer. You can’t just stand by and do nothing.” “I’m aching all over from working for you. If I faint while carrying the child and accidentally drop it, now that would really be a sin!” The cries of the little bastard in the bundle were growing weaker. My father and brother glared at me. They looked like they wanted to devour me alive. My father’s face turned iron-gray, his fingers tightly pinching the bundle. As if he wanted to strangle the child inside. William panicked too, like a chicken with its throat squeezed. “Brother! What are you saying! Dad’s old, and I’ve always been weak. How could we handle the back and forth?” I clenched my fists and leaned against the doorframe, sneering. “We’re all born of the same parents. So I’m the only one with thick skin and a cheap life, is that it?” “All the dirty and tiring work has always fallen to me.” “You two get to be kind-hearted living Buddhas, while I’m destined to be a beast of burden?” George trembled with anger. All traces of kindness and civility had vanished. He looked like he wanted to tear me apart. “Lucas Young! You ungrateful wretch!” “Do you think you can start complaining now that you might get to return to the city?” “If you don’t take care of this child today, I’ll go around the village shouting, let everyone know you turned a blind eye to someone in need!” I stared at him and spoke slowly and deliberately. “Do whatever you want.” This life, no one will use “conscience” to pressure me again!
In my previous life, I listened to their devilish words. I took that little bastard to the clinic. Right after, I was pointed at and gossiped about. They spread rumors that I, a young man, was suddenly carrying a child for no reason. It was almost certain that the child was mine, born of an affair with some woman. George and William spread rumors about me everywhere. It was just when they were selecting young people to return to the city. A young person’s moral conduct was an especially important selection criterion. Because of these baseless rumors, my chance to return to the city was revoked. This time, I absolutely won’t have anything to do with that little bastard! Unexpectedly, though I didn’t look for trouble, trouble found me. Just as I was packing to return to the city, the yard gate was suddenly kicked open from outside. Gwen stood at the door holding the blood-covered little bastard, cursing loudly. “Lucas Young! You shameless scoundrel!” “You sweet-talked me into bed and got me pregnant!” “Now you want to go back to the city, so you abandoned your son, not caring if he lives or dies. How can you be so vicious!” My blood instantly froze. In my previous life, it was this crazy woman who made me live worse than death for twenty years! I walked out of the house. Half the village had already gathered at the door. Gwen, who had beaten me for half my life, stood guarding the door, cursing loudly. Back then, because I adopted that bastard, my reputation was ruined and I couldn’t return to the city. George decided to have me marry Gwen, a widow in the village who was over ten years older than me. I didn’t want to. George acted like the family patriarch. He said with my reputation as a scoundrel, I couldn’t marry a girl from a decent family anymore. Marrying Gwen would at least give the child a mother, so he wouldn’t be bullied as a single parent child. He tol a singled me not to only think of myself, but to the child’s welfare. Later he simply sent the bride price to Gwen on his own. He forced me to marry Gwen. Although Gwen was older, she treated the child I had adopted very well, like a real mother! As time passed, I resigned myself to my fate. I planned to settle down, raise the child, and live my life with Gwen. Just because I helped a young widow whose husband had died young carry two bags of grain while she was pregnant with her late husband’s child, I was beaten. Gwen dragged me to the yard, grabbed my hair and smashed my head against the millstone. In front of the neighbors, she cursed and spat at me. “Lucas Young, you’re really shameless! I didn’t look down on you for being a scoundrel when I married into your family!” “You ungrateful bastard! You dare to steal women from me! Is that little slut pregnant with your child?” Faced with Gwen’s hysterical behavior… I desperately tried to explain that I just saw someone in need and wanted to help, as we’re all neighbors. But she didn’t believe me at all. She insisted I couldn’t change my scoundrel ways, that I was seducing young wives! She even picked up a stick and beat my right leg, crippling me for life. Not a single relative or neighbor was willing to help. They despised me even more for being no good. I had been unfaithful before marriage, having an illegitimate child with some loose woman. After marriage, I still wasn’t an upright person. They all felt that a dirty scoundrel like me who fooled around deserved to be beaten. At the time, George and William were watching from the side. Neither of them came to pull Gwen away. At the time, I thought they were just scared by the crazed Gwen. I was even afraid my blood would splatter on them. Now that I think about it, it’s really laughable. Every time George and William came to see me, Gwen would find an excuse to beat me viciously. Whenever I really couldn’t take it anymore and wanted to divorce Gwen, George and William would always persuade me: “For the sake of how good she is to the child, just endure it. It’ll get better with time. The child can’t be without a mother!” I believed these words, swallowed my tears and pain, gritted my teeth, and continued living with Gwen. As my adopted daughter grew up, she looked more and more like Gwen, but I didn’t think much of it. I just thought that after being raised for so long, it was natural for a child to resemble their adoptive parents. I thought it was because the child was close to her parents.
Gwen’s ability to turn black into white… Made me suffer for a lifetime. I didn’t expect that in this life, she would directly throw mud at me. The villagers watching couldn’t help but point at me and criticize. Their spit nearly drowned me. “Even a tiger doesn’t eat its cubs. This man’s heart is really vicious!” “The child was crying and almost dying at the clinic, yet he still has the nerve to pack his bags!” “Ptui! Scoundrel! You deserve to be condemned!” “I just heard at the clinic that this child’s ears were trampled deaf by either sheep or donkey hooves. Who knows if his brain was damaged too!” “To have such a father, what terrible luck!” The accusations from all sides made my head buzz. Memories of a lifetime of being unable to hold my head high, always inferior to others, flooded back. I tasted blood in my throat. The words “scoundrel” and “scum” kept drilling into my brain. George rushed over and slapped me hard across the face. He still smelled of the clean soap I had risked my life to buy for him, working in the mountains breaking rocks and pulling carts like a donkey. He pointed at my face and cursed righteously. “How could I have given birth to such a shameless son!” Blood dripped from my split lip onto the snow. My face stung and burned. George leaned back, as if he had suffered a great injustice. “It’s all my fault as a father for not teaching you well. How could you do such a despicable thing!” “Our Young family has been upright for generations. Now we can’t even face our ancestors underground!” The uncles and aunts tried to persuade him. “You can’t control grown children! How can you watch over him all the time!” “When a boy grows up, if he wants to fool around, how can you as a father stop him? You can’t tie him to your waist.” William quickly chimed in, adding fuel to the fire. “Brother, even if you really want to return to the city, you can’t mistreat the child like this!” “I’ve always told you to be upright and responsible, but you just wouldn’t listen…” The corner of a brand new dress shirt peeked out from under his coat. It was the shirt I had exchanged thirty work points for, just so I could return to the city looking presentable. He had stolen it and was wearing it himself. But never mind, I stole something of his too! William deliberately lifted the blanket, exposing the child’s festering ears. The crowd instantly exploded. Several strong men looked like they wanted to beat me with sticks. Someone spat in my face. I immediately dropped to the ground and started rolling around. Like a mad dog, I bit anyone who tried to pull me away. “Gwen! You say I had an affair with you! What proof do you have?” Gwen snorted coldly and pulled out a pair of men’s underwear from her labor reform cloth bag. “You scoundrel! Do you dare say these aren’t yours!” “And you have a birthmark on your left buttock!” The crowd’s curses became even more vicious. The village chief was so angry he stamped his feet. “You’ve completely ruined our village’s reputation! You still want to return to the city? Keep dreaming!” “We’d rather give the spot to William than to scum like you!” The smiles on William and George’s faces were barely concealed. I got up from the ground, wiped the blood from my face. I tore open the pocket of my clothes and took something out, holding it up. “What a coincidence, I have some evidence too.”
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