Six years after we broke up, I found myself in his emergency room. “I’m pregnant. The baby is yours.” His face went ashen. “Pregnant with a six-year-old? What are you even talking about?” The atmosphere instantly became unbearably awkward. “So, you’re not going to acknowledge it?” “You think I’d just step up and be a stand-in dad?” he shot back. I fell silent for a few seconds. “Fine. Then I’ll find a father for him myself.” Nine months later. He clutched the chief surgeon’s arm, his voice rough with desperation. “Please, man, I’m begging you. Make the incision as neat as possible. She’s obsessed with how things look.” I went for a pre-marital health check with my blind date. Turns out, I was pregnant. The wedding was off. Mrs. Gable, the matchmaker, stormed over to my place and reamed my mom out. “You told me your girl was a good, wholesome catch! A good, wholesome catch who’s two months pregnant?!” “You’ve completely ruined my reputation!” “Don’t ever call me again! Bad luck!” … My mom got an earful, then I got an earful from my mom. “Who’s the father?” “…” I just clammed up. “Skylar Hayes, you’re twenty-eight, not eight! Are you still messing around out there? Do you have any common sense?” “Are you trying to kill me, your mother, with stress?” “Whatever.” I turned and went upstairs, locking the door behind me.
I lay on my bed, racking my brain. My period had definitely been three weeks late. And lately, I’d been feeling a bit off my food. My cycle was usually all over the place, impossible to track, mostly thanks to my late nights. I just thought this time was the same. It never crossed my mind that I was pregnant. And the father? None other than my ex-boyfriend from six years ago. Two months back, I went to a class reunion. He showed up really late and was completely wasted. I was the one who took him home. When we got to his place, I practically had to carry him inside. When I left, I stumbled out, practically crawling. The taxi driver must’ve thought something was seriously wrong with me. He kept glancing at me in the rearview mirror, not daring to say a word. … After a few days of thinking at home, I still went to Liam’s hospital. I waited in line, paid the fees, got the tests done, and finally, report in hand, headed to his department. “Consultations are over for the morning. Come back this afternoon.” I’d barely stepped in when he dismissed me without even looking up. He must’ve sensed I hadn’t left, because he suddenly looked up and saw me. His gaze snapped, his pupils shrinking. He looked utterly shocked, like someone seeing a long-lost friend. What an act. How could he have mistaken me for someone else at the reunion? “Skylar?” He parted his lips. Before he could finish, I neatly placed the report in front of him. “I’m pregnant. The baby is yours,” I stated, getting straight to the point. He glanced down at the report, his face grave. I could almost feel his fear. “What baby is six years overdue?” His long fingers tapped the report. “Did you lose your memory? We broke up six years ago.” His words slammed me into silence, my face burning with humiliation. “You’re not going to acknowledge it?” I asked through gritted teeth. He looked up at me, his expression unreadable. “Skylar, if you regret something, you should act like it. What… you think I’d be foolish enough to fall for that?” He didn’t look at the report again, burying his head in a patient file, clearly done with me. “You—!” I almost blurted out a string of curses. I never imagined he wouldn’t just deny it, but accuse me of regretting our breakup! A jerk like him? Skylar Hayes would never regret a thing in her life. Even if… I did regret it, I absolutely couldn’t let him see it! I forced myself to calm down for a few seconds, trying to figure out what to say. “Don’t you think the baby’s eyes look exactly like yours?” He still lowered his head for a quick glance at the report, then sighed. Right? He finally admitted it? “It’s a ten-week ultrasound scan. Tell me, where exactly are its eyes?” In that instant, I realized my mistake. Forget it. You can’t wake up someone who doesn’t want to be a father. “Fine. Then I’ll find a father for him myself.” I tossed out the words and turned, walking out of his office.
Liam was a year older than me, the brilliant, untouchable legend of the medical school. He was incredibly hard to get. I practically worshipped the ground he walked on for four whole years, and finally, just a few months before graduation, I managed to win him over. Everyone said Liam only got with me because I was so ridiculously dramatic and wouldn’t leave him alone. “Otherwise, why would the esteemed A-list genius fall for someone like Skylar Hayes, who’s both chubby and plain, from the History department?” “Her stomach? When she ate, she looked five months pregnant.” They didn’t know that to chase Liam, I’d lost thirty pounds, dropping from 120 to 90. I deleted all my food delivery apps, munched on apples in the mornings, and cucumbers at night. I ate like that for months. I was so starved, I swear I could have eaten a housefly. I did get skinny, but my period became severely irregular, and my sleep was completely messed up. All of it, just for Liam to give me an extra glance. One day, I was running on the track, trailing behind him, and he turned around to look at me. He stared for a long, long time. My entire face flushed crimson. He liked me. He just had to. I nervously walked over, rehearsing my opening line— “Are you Skylar’s sister?” His words hit me like a bucket of ice water, drenching me from head to toe. I was furious, but also found it strangely funny. “I… guess so.” He fell silent for a moment, then handed me a bottle of water. “Then go tell her to stop bothering me.” I took the water he offered. It was the first time I’d been so close to him. His eyelashes were so long, his nose so sharp. And his voice, so gentle when he spoke. But his words were so cold. “Alright.” I swallowed my hurt. After that, we often bumped into each other on the track. After our tenth encounter, he asked for my SnapChat. That was the first time I felt like losing those thirty pounds was totally worth it! Because, my entire life, no one had ever asked for my SnapChat, except for people handing out flyers on the street. I asked him to a movie. He didn’t refuse. I suggested we date. He didn’t refuse. Even when I broke up with him, he didn’t refuse. It was me, actually, who cried for a day and a night straight in my dorm. My roommate asked, “Is a breakup really that sad?” I sobbed, “It’s alright.” “It’s like seeing an old friend off. You just have to cry a little.”
He was like a still, lifeless pond. So calm it terrified me. I only heard that afterward, his friends never dared to mention my name in front of him. He’d flip out if they did. I get it. A big shot like him, brought low by something so trivial? He must’ve been furious. But to say he hated me? I probably wasn’t even worth his hatred. After graduation, I moved back to my hometown city for work. My salary was $4500 a month, and my mom arranged ten blind dates for me a year. I’d gone on over a hundred, big and small, and I was completely numb to it all. Which is why this time, when Mrs. Gable introduced us, we settled on the wedding plans less than a month after meeting. He was a thirty-year-old elementary school teacher from a small town, stable job, parents lived in the countryside, and he had a younger brother in high school. “A guy with his conditions isn’t easy to find. How much could his brother’s high school and college cost anyway?” “You’re twenty-eight, if you don’t get married soon, you’ll only be looking at divorced guys.” “And these divorced guys with kids, if they knew you had a sister like that at home, they’d probably be even harder to snag.” … My mom sat at the table, nodding meekly, her voice low. “Make sure you ask them clearly, they don’t mind our family, right?” “Tell them not to worry, Skylar’s sister won’t be a burden. We’re still young, we can still work…” Every time I saw my mom like that, it just annoyed me. I felt like a bargain-bin item, clearly priced and ready to be sold off. My mom fawningly saw Mrs. Gable out, stuffing a big red envelope into her hand as she left. Everything was ready. Then, that thing happened to me. My mom was so mad she didn’t speak to me for days. But anger aside, within a few days, she showed up in the city with a cardboard box of eggs. Her coat was wrapped around the box, and inside were bags of rice. My mom’s hair was a mess, but not a single egg was broken. “Did you go to the hospital for a check-up?” My mom carefully placed the eggs in the fridge, then turned to ask me. “Check-up for what?” I fiddled with my phone. “No.” “To see what the baby looks like, of course! You, this child, why are you so careless?” My mom started pulling me towards the door. “What’s there to see?” I pulled away. “You really don’t plan on keeping it?” My mom looked at me worriedly. The atmosphere grew awkward. I fell silent. It wasn’t that I didn’t want it; it was that *he* didn’t want it. “You’re not getting any younger. If you don’t keep this one, what if it’s hard to have another later?” “You’ve been going on blind dates anyway. Find that boy, and your dad and I can meet him. If he’s decent, just go ahead and get married.” Get married? She was really dreaming big, dreaming beautiful. “Just leave it alone. I’ll go to the hospital for the procedure in a couple of days.” I brushed my mom off. My mom heard my resolute tone and wanted to persuade me again. “Don’t be impulsive. That’s a life,” my mom insisted as I closed the door. “Is that how you had Lily back then?” I blurted out. “…” My mom instantly clammed up. Her eyes looked deeply hurt. Lily was my younger sister. And my mom’s absolute Achilles’ heel. She was ten years old this year, couldn’t speak, and had epilepsy. After I’d driven her away like that, my chest felt tight. Every time I said those things, I felt like I was retaliating, but then quickly regretted it. I picked up my phone, booked an appointment, and headed to the hospital. On the way, I even seriously considered my mom’s words, “What if you just get married?” I wondered, if I married Liam, would I be willing? How could I not be willing? That was once my dream. Passing the emergency department on the first floor, I instantly spotted Liam. A group of nurses and doctors were frantically working on a newly arrived patient. He was in his white coat, having just inserted a breathing tube, and even his profile view made my breath catch. So I thought, even if I could go back in time, I still wouldn’t have been able to push him away that night at the reunion. The moment I saw him, he saw me too. He only gave me a hurried glance for a second before looking away, continuing the resuscitation. He was so busy. I didn’t dare to disturb him, so I just sat on a chair outside, waiting. I’d made up my mind. Even if he rejected me again, I had to get answers. Why had he acted so passionately towards me at the reunion that night, only to deny it afterward? Even if he didn’t acknowledge it, he should at least come with me for the procedure… I didn’t have the money. In the ten minutes I waited for him, I thought of so many possibilities. Each one, I planned out my escape route. But everything crumbled when I opened my Ins, and saw his latest post… “Liam Miller: Six pounds, six ounces. Mother and son are doing well.” My heart lurched violently, as if all the strength had been drained from me. He was married, and he had a child. Born today. No wonder he didn’t acknowledge what happened that night. No wonder he didn’t want the baby.
I found it somewhat laughable. That night, he was drunk, his eyes red, and he asked me, “Are you Skylar Hayes?” I hesitated. “Yes.” But he deflated, looking at me. “No, you’re not.” “Then tell me, what do you want with her?” I asked, smiling. “To collect a debt.” A debt? My smile froze. “What kind of debt?” “An emotional one.” He looked pale and helpless, then added coldly, “No one messes with Liam Miller and gets away with it.” Hearing him talk about an emotional debt, I suddenly lost myself. The next second, he kissed me. I didn’t push him away. Of course, losing control later was partly due to my own indulgence. In the heat of the moment, I thought maybe, just maybe, he still loved me. I don’t know how I ended up in the gynecology department. The whole process was a blur. I just heard the doctor say that my HCG levels were low, my uterine lining was thin, and there was a high risk of miscarriage. The doctor wanted to prescribe me shots to sustain the pregnancy, but I refused. Thinking of Liam’s Ins post, what was there to sustain anymore…? I took a car and went home, crestfallen. My phone suddenly rang. It was an unknown number. “Where are you?” It was Liam. He hadn’t called in six years, but I still recognized his voice immediately. Aloof, cool. “In the car,” I adjusted my breathing, trying to calm down. “You were looking for me just now? What for?” His tone was still arrogant. I paused for a second. “Uh, it’s nothing now.” He was silent on the other end for a while. “Still not giving up? We have no future.” “…Alright, then. I’m hanging up.” I moved to end the call abruptly. But he wouldn’t let me. “I heard from your doctor. Your condition isn’t great. You should still come back for those shots. I’ll talk to the doctor for you. As acquaintances, that’s all I can do.” *Slam!* I hung up the phone. Jerk! Who needed his help? But he sent another text message, furiously asking, “Skylar, why have you become so rude now?” I was livid with indignation. “What do you consider polite? Instead of lecturing me, you should go home and change more diapers!” “?” He sent a single question mark. I couldn’t be bothered to reply. Did he think I was still the Skylar he could manipulate from back then? Back then, if he posted something, I’d meticulously analyze it for ages; When chatting with him, I never dared let his reply be the last; I racked my brain for topics, only for his replies to always be: “Sleeping.” “Going to shower.” “Talk later.” “…” Back home, I lay on my bed, pulled out our old photos, cut them all to shreds, and flushed his face down the toilet. You bastard, go to hell! But tears still streamed down my face, despite myself.
The next morning, I woke up and went back to work. The company transferred me to the marketing department. “Marketing involves visiting stores. It’s tiring, but if you do well, you can earn over ten thousand a month,” the marketing manager told me, painting a rosy picture. The truth was, a colleague in marketing had gone on maternity leave, and they needed a replacement. In their eyes, an older, unmarried woman like me, who didn’t even have a boyfriend, was the ideal candidate for this kind of job. Otherwise, anyone else might turn out to be a ‘mine’ waiting to explode. “Are there any subsidies?” In the adult world, I didn’t believe in rosy pictures; I only cared about money. “Daily transportation and living allowance of $80. If you perform well, your phone bill will be reimbursed too.” “Deal.” $80 a day, $2400 a month. Sending this extra $2400 back to my mom might slow down the rate at which her gray hairs appeared. So, I went from a regular office worker to a small sales manager, constantly rushing between major supermarkets, clocking in, checking merchandise, compiling sales figures… Every day I came home, I was too exhausted to speak. While using the restroom, I noticed a tiny bit of blood. I remembered the doctor’s words and sighed inwardly. The baby was probably gone. But I was sadder than I expected. I didn’t sleep a wink that night. After another weekend, I went to the hospital to book an appointment for a check-up. This time, it was a female doctor named Dr. Avery Stone, quite pretty. “You know Liam Miller? Why didn’t you say so?” Dr. Stone’s sudden warmth made me a bit uncomfortable. “Sort of.” “So, did he have a girlfriend back in school? What type was she?” I froze. Her questions were a bit beyond the patient-doctor relationship. I think I understood: she was interested in Liam. But Liam already had a child; didn’t she know? Could Liam be lying to his colleagues, pretending to be single? What a jerk. “His college girlfriend was very ordinary,” I answered truthfully. “Do you have a picture? I want to see.” She was really persistent. I looked directly at her, letting her look at me for two seconds. Why look at a picture? The person herself is right in front of you. She seemed to forget I was there for a check-up. The thought of Liam, with a family, still pretending to be single at the reunion, and now portraying himself as single at the hospital, made me furious. “Is he married?” I subtly reminded her. “Married?” She was clearly shocked. “I haven’t heard anything about that.” This… “Why would you say that?” Her expression was a bit unnatural. She seemed to think I was lying, and I felt a headache coming on. “Maybe his Ins account was hacked?” I had no choice but to show her the post. She looked at the post, her face paling in shock. “Dr. Miller has a child?” Just as she finished— “Step outside for a moment.” A cold voice sounded behind me. I jumped. Liam?! Oh no, he’ll be furious that I exposed his secret. “Liam, what are you doing here…?” Dr. Stone stood up, a little flustered. I turned around and saw him in his white coat. He looked as dashing as ever, but his face was incredibly dark. “Hurry up, I don’t have time…” He sounded annoyed. I thought about it. Why should I be scared of him? He was the one in the wrong. So I bravely followed him out. He led me to his office. After we entered, he locked the door. My hand went to my arm, a little nervous. “Just talk. Why are you locking the door?” I looked at the lock, feeling a bad premonition. “Don’t want to be disturbed,” he tossed out, then sat down in his office chair. Huh! Still so arrogant, exactly like six years ago. “So, say it.” In that enclosed room, I actually didn’t dare to look at him. “Are you going around telling everyone I have a child?” He lifted his eyes, squinting at me. It made me break out in a cold sweat. “Not ‘everywhere’… I just stated the facts. Besides, Dr. Stone is a really nice person, you shouldn’t lie to people.” He didn’t say a word, his gaze sweeping over my stomach. Why was he looking at my stomach? I quickly pulled my shirt down further. “Heh…” He let out a cold laugh. “Are you really clinging to me? What, your blind date didn’t meet your standards?” Me: ? When did I cling to him? The baby I was talking about wasn’t this baby. Was he crazy? “Don’t flatter yourself,” I said, exasperated. “Skylar, I know you too well. Do you look any different now than you did when you were chasing me back then?” He looked at me, amused. I admit, his words stung. “And?” “Impossible. Your little tricks only worked on the old me. Do you really think, after six years, I’d still fall for them?” He scoffed. “I heard you’re getting married soon. Don’t bother me anymore. Do you want me to give you a wedding gift?” Married? He thought I was looking for a wedding gift? He really got to me. “You actually think you’re as handsome as you were back then? You’re old now, you’ve got wrinkles! Do you really think I’d be interested in a used, old man like you?” I rattled it off in one breath. His smile froze, his face turning even darker. “Skylar, reverse psychology won’t work on me,” he said, getting up and calmly taking off his white coat. “We broke up. Even if we hadn’t, I wouldn’t spoil you rotten.” The atmosphere instantly turned to an impasse. I laughed. When had he ever spoiled me? What a big softie act. “Liam, you’ve got guts.” I smiled, walking towards the door. At the doorway, I remembered something, turned back around. “You’ve got guts, don’t you get drunk and hold onto me, crying and calling my name. That would make me misunderstand you still can’t forget me.” “And your ‘seed’,” I pointed at my stomach. “It’s gone.” He stood there, as if he’d taken a heavy blow. Seeing him upset made me feel incredibly good. After closing the door, I went back to the gynecology department.
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