
The first day of freshman year, a charity case showed up in our dorm room. She was schlepping a battered duffel bag that looked like it had been through a war, and her eyes were glued to the durian on my desk. Just then, I saw the comments pop into my vision, translucent and glowing: ăOMG, poor baby. She grew up in some backwoods town in Appalachia, she has no idea what a durian even is.ă A wave of pity washed over me, a familiar, stupid ache. I immediately offered her a piece. Later, more comments flooded my vision: ăLook at her clothes, they’re literally falling apart. I bet she got them from a dumpster. If only someone would give her a new outfit.ă ăSheâs staring at her roommatesâ skincare products. Sheâs so envious but she’d never say anything. She’s terrified they’ll think she’s pathetic.ă My sympathy went into overdrive. I didn’t just give her my barely-used designer clothes and La Mer products. I loaded her student dining card with ten grand and told her to go nuts. I never imagined that on graduation day, Maya would stand on stage and accuse me of being her personal tormentor. âShe forced me to eat her leftovers, to wear her dirty, blood-stained underwear! I worked two jobs to save up money for my meal plan, and she stole my card to buy thousand-dollar steaks for herself!â âI endured that for four years! Is it a crime to be poor?! Do I deserve to be humiliated just because I don’t have money?!â Overnight, Maya became a viral sensation, a symbol of resilience. I, on the other hand, was doxxed and canceled. It ended when an unhinged internet “crusader” posed as a maintenance guy, got into my apartment, and hacked me to death. When I opened my eyes again, I was back. Back on the first day of freshman year. 1 It was September. The air in the dorm still hung thick with the last, sticky breath of summer. I stood in the middle of Room 403. The familiar, sterile smell of old linoleum and cheap paint. I dug my nails into my palm. The sharp sting of pain was a welcome confirmation: this wasn’t a dream. I was really back. Back to four years ago. The day the nightmare began. *Creeeakâ* The dorm room door swung open. I let out a slow, shaky breath and turned around. A girl was dragging a ridiculously overstuffed, beat-up duffel bag, shuffling into the room like she was trying to make herself invisible. Same faded, ill-fitting clothes. Same downcast eyes that refused to meet anyone’s gaze. Maya. She dropped her bag with a soft thud and timidly looked up. Her eyes, however, were like spotlights, darting around the room, taking everything in. They swept over our other two roommates, already unpacking, and then landed on my side of the room. To be more specific, they landed on the spiky, pungent behemoth on my desk: a premium Musang King durian. Her nose twitched, almost imperceptibly. Her eyes, wide with a kind of raw curiosity, were locked on it. And right on cue, the familiar, semi-transparent text flickered into existence in front of my face: ăMy heart breaks for her. Grew up dirt poor in the mountains, probably never even seen a fruit like that.ă ăLook how curious she is, but she’s too scared to ask. I’m crying. đđă ăCan’t the rich roommate just offer her a piece? Our girl would be so grateful.ă A tide of hatred and disgust rose in my throat, so powerful it almost choked me. In my last life, it was these comments, dripping with fake sympathy and self-righteousness, that turned me into a complete idiot. They made me nurture a venomous snake that repaid my kindness by sinking its fangs into me, leading to my brutal murder. *”She didn’t just force me to eat her scraps and wear her disgusting, used clothes! She made me use her expired, dollar-store skincare, trying to ruin my face so sheâd feel better about herself!”* *”And worse, the second I deposited my hard-earned paycheck onto my dining card, sheâd take it and blow it on a hundred-dollar steak! That was my food money for two months!”* *”I lived like that for four years! Just because I’m poor, does that mean I deserve to be someone’s plaything? I was trying so hard, so damn hard just to survive!”* *”I’m sorry… I just can’t take it anymore… I don’t think I can go on…”* Her tear-streaked performance at graduation. The looks of disgust and contempt from the crowd. The frantic, weeping phone calls from my parents after our number was leaked. The dull thud of the blade hitting my bone… The memories exploded in my head. 2 âHey there.â My own voice sounded eerily calm. Maya jumped like a startled deer, her head snapping down as she nervously twisted the hem of her worn-out t-shirt. âI-Iâm sorry, I just⌠Iâve never seen one of those beforeâŚâ I smiled, tapping the durian with a manicured nail. âYou know what this is?â âIs it⌠a durian?â she whispered, her gaze still glued to it. She swallowed, a perfectly timed, delicate motion. âIâve only seen them on TV. It smells⌠interesting.â ăShe really hasn’t! Come on, give her a taste!ă ăSheâs so precious and shy. My heart canât take it.ă ăThe roommate seems nice enough. C’mon, share a little, please! đă The comments scrolled past. I methodically found a seam and pried the durian open. The golden, creamy flesh was revealed, its potent, sweet-and-funky aroma flooding the room. I picked up the plumpest, most perfect pod. But I didnât hand it to Maya. Instead, right in front of her, I slowly brought it to my own lips and took a huge bite. The flesh was like a rich, sweet custard. Absolutely divine. âYep, itâs a durian. A tropical fruit,â I said, my voice bright. âA bit on the pricey side, though. This one was almost a hundred bucks.â I hummed in satisfaction, took another bite, and flashed Maya my most brilliant smile. âItâs really good. I guess I have my parents to thank. They worked their butts off so I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want, without having to stare at other peopleâs food and drool.â Silence. The hopeful look on Maya’s face froze, replaced by a flash of humiliation and resentment so quick I would have missed it if I wasn’t looking for it. I ignored it, picking up the rest of the durian and walking over to my other two roommates, who had paused their unpacking to watch the awkward scene unfold. âJess, Lauren, you guys have to try some of this. Thereâs no way I can finish it all myself.â I smiled and offered them each a piece. They were both from comfortable, upper-middle-class families, but not “drop-a-hundred-bucks-on-a-fruit” rich. âWow, thanks, Ava!â Jess, the more outgoing of the two, took a piece and nibbled it. Her eyes widened. âWhoa, thatâs amazing! Itâs so sweet!â âYeah, it really is,â Lauren added quietly, blushing a little. âIâve never had the fancy kind before. Thank you.â After Iâd shared with them, there was one small piece left on the husk. ăShe wants some too… Everyone else got a piece, she’s feeling so left out.ă ăShe’s never had it before. Just a tiny bite is all she wants. She’ll remember your kindness forever.ă ăThe rich roommate is so nice, I’m sure she’ll give the last piece to Maya, right?ă 3 The comments popped up right on schedule, cheering Maya on from their invisible sidelines. I saw her out of the corner of my eye. Sheâd taken a tiny step forward. The hurt expression was gone, replaced with one of pure, hopeful anticipation. Her hands were clasped in front of her, like a good little girl waiting for candy. A cold smirk played on my lips. This was the exact innocent, harmless act that lured me into her trap last time. I actually believed my kindness could heal a wounded, insecure soul. What a joke. I picked up the last piece of durian. Mayaâs eyes lit up. But just as she was about to instinctively reach for it, I flicked my wrist and popped it into my own mouth. âOh!â I gasped lightly, as if Iâd just remembered something. I gave Maya a deeply apologetic smile. âIâm so sorry, I just remembered. You know, some people are really allergic to durian? Like, anaphylactic shock, canât-breathe kind of allergic. Since youâve never had it before, itâs probably not safe. It would be terrible if something happened on the first day. Better to be safe than sorry.â I chewed thoughtfully, my eyes crinkling in enjoyment. âMmm, so good. Yeah, for your own safety, I wonât share this time. Maybe next time. For sure.â The color drained from Mayaâs face. She stared at me, her eyes wide with disbelief. Her lower lip began to tremble as her eyes filled with tears, but she fought to hold them back. This was clearly not in her script. âItâs⌠itâs okay,â she choked out, looking down at the floor. âI⌠I donât deserve to eat something so expensive anyway⌠Thanks for looking out for me.â She looked like the saddest, most pitiful creature on earth. ăWhat? Why would she do that? Maya just wanted one bite.ă ăThis is so cruel. Making her watch everyone else eatâŚă ăMaybe the roommate really was just worried about an allergy⌠I hope soâŚă âBy the way, Iâm Ava,â I said, briskly changing the subject. âYou must be our new roommate, Maya, right? Your bed is over there, the one by the door. You should get unpacked. Let us know if you need anything.â I pointed to the worst bed in the roomâthe one right by the noisy hallway, furthest from the A/C unit. Maya followed my finger, her lips pressing into a thin line. She shuffled over to her duffel bag and started dragging it across the floor. Jess and Lauren exchanged a look and started to get up, but I shot them a sharp glance and a tiny shake of my head. They hesitated, then sat back down. Seeing that no one was offering to help, Maya had to haul the heavy bag to her bed all by herself. 4 Just then, the zipper on her bag, which hadnât been closed properly, gave way, and a few items of clothing spilled out onto the floor. They were all old, faded, and frayed at the edges. âOh!â she cried, scrambling to pick them up. The comments went into a frenzy. ăOMG, LOOK AT HER CLOTHES! The cuffs are torn! Theyâre full of holes!ă ăMy heart is shattered. Her face is so red, she must be so embarrassed. It’s not her fault she’s poor.ă ăThatâs probably all she owns. Three outfits she pulled out of a charity bin. I wish someone would buy our girl a new shirt.ă Last time, it was this little “accidental” spill that had me packing up a huge bag of my own nearly-new designer clothes for her the very next day. Those same clothes she later claimed I forced her to wear, including “dirty, blood-stained underwear.” This time, I just watched, my expression blank. Maya stuffed the clothes back in her bag, her cheeks and the rims of her eyes a blotchy red. âS-sorry, I didnât pack very wellâŚâ âItâs fine,â I said coolly. âItâs move-in day, things are chaotic. But just so you know, the dorm rooms are pretty small, so try to keep your personal stuff contained in your own space, okay? We don’t want to clutter up the common areas.â Mayaâs body went rigid for a split second. She mumbled a quiet âOkay,â and went back to unpacking her few meager possessions. A moment later, she pulled out a generic, unlabeled bottle of lotion. She glanced at the collection of glossy bottles and jars on my vanityâthe La Mer, the Drunk Elephant, the Augustinus Baderâand heaved a perfectly calibrated sigh of longing and despair. Naturally, the live feed started up again. ăSheâs secretly looking at her roommateâs skincare. You can see the envy and sadness in her eyes. Iâm dead.ă ăShe’s probably never used anything but soap and water on her face. This is heartbreaking.ă ăAnd sheâd never dare ask for any. Sheâs too afraid of being judged for being a country bumpkin.ă I felt nothing. In fact, a dark humor bubbled up inside me. The very La Mer cream Iâd given her in our last life became “expired, no-name poison” in her sob story. Letâs see how you spin this now, Maya. I picked up my toner, ostentatiously patting it on my face. âHey Jess,â I said loudly. âWanna hit the mall this weekend? Iâm running low on a few things.â Jess, caught off guard, replied, âOh, yeah, sure! I need to grab some stuff too.â Mayaâs movements slowed to a crawl. She was listening intently, the disappointment on her face becoming more and more pronounced. I paid her no attention. After she finished unpacking, she just sat on the edge of her bed, looking lost and out of place. When dinner time rolled around, Jess and Lauren asked, âHey, you guys wanna go to the dining hall?â Maya was silent for a few seconds before pulling a small, worn cloth pouch from her pocket. She carefully unfolded it, revealing a few crumpled dollar bills. She counted them, then said in a voice as quiet as a mouse, âI, uh, brought my own food. You guys go ahead.â She reached into her duffel bag and pulled out an old metal tin. Inside was a dry piece of bread and what looked like a few pickles. ăIâm actually crying! Thatâs all sheâs eating?!ă ăShe’s so used to hardship. Grew up never having enough to eat, probably went a whole year without meat. This is just normal for her.ă ăIf only the rich roommate had a heart and would just take her to dinner. Our girl would repay her a thousand times over!ă 5 Here we go again. The same damn script. Last time, this was the scene that broke me. This, and the relentless stream of pity-party comments. I was so overwhelmed with guilt that I immediately took her dining card, loaded it with ten grand, and told her it was ours to share. And my reward? She accused me of stealing her “hard-earned part-time job money” to buy myself “hundred-dollar steaks.” The truth was, to save her the embarrassment, I gave her the card to use as her own. I mostly ordered takeout anyway. On the rare occasion I ate at the dining hall, I paid with cash. Those hundred-dollar steaks? She ordered every single one of them herself. âOkay, then. Weâll head out,â I said, my face a mask of indifference. âI heard the West End dining hall has a pretty decent grill. Iâm thinking of trying their New York strip tonight.â Mayaâs head shot up, her eyes flashing with a familiar, greedy light. She was waiting, expecting me to say, âWhy donât you come with us?â I didnât. I just grabbed my wallet and walked out of the room with Jess and Lauren. As the door clicked shut behind me, I could have sworn I heard the sound of a choked sob from inside. Walking down the hall, Lauren finally broke the silence. âAva⌠you seem a little⌠cold to Maya.â Jess nodded in agreement, looking at me with curiosity. I stopped and looked at them both, taking a deep breath. âJess, Lauren,â I said, my voice low but firm, carrying a weight they couldnât possibly understand. âListen to me, and remember this. No matter how pathetic Maya seems, no matter what sob story she tells you, do not give her anything valuable. Especially not cash. If you feel like you absolutely have to help her, make sure you have a record of it. A receipt. A text message. Something.â âWhy?â they asked in unison, completely baffled. âBecause some people are not poor in pocket, theyâre poor in spirit. And helping the wrong person isnât just a mistake. It can get you killed.â I glanced back at the closed door of Room 403, my eyes like chips of ice. Your show is just getting started, Maya. And so is my revenge. This time, without my bottomless bank account to fund your “resilient poor girl” narrative, letâs see how long you can keep the act up. You don’t just owe me an apology. You owe me a life.
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