As my husband lay dying, he grabbed our son’s hand and whispered, “It’s time to bring your real mother back. Take care of her.” But I was right there in the room. My son nodded tearfully. “She’s had a rough life hiding all these years, Dad. I should.” Then my husband looked at me and said, “Thirty years of being called ‘Mom’ by my kid should be more than enough to make you feel appreciated.” I stood frozen, realizing for the first time that my adopted son was actually the child of my husband and our neighbor, conceived before our marriage. Furious, I left the hospital. I was struck by a truck on the way home and died instantly. But when I opened my eyes again, I found myself on the day everyone first urged me to adopt that child. 01 At a family dinner with Jim Holden’s relatives, my mother-in-law, Mary Holden, again pressured us about adopting a child. “Grace has been married for three years, and with her miscarriage and health issues, having a baby now could be risky for both her and the child,” she said. “If it doesn’t work out, why not consider adoption?” I sat there stunned, my hand pinching Jim’s thigh under the table. He winced and yelled, “Mom’s talking to you, Grace! Why are you pinching me?” Seeing his face twisted in pain confirmed it: I’d come back to life, and here I was, facing this family all over again. Just like in my last life, everyone was hinting that I’d failed them by not having a baby. Back then, Jim had pretended to support me, but he’d put the blame squarely on me too. “Grace and I are meant to be together. I love her unconditionally, child or no child,” he’d said at the table then, adding, “I don’t want her to take any risks.” “Stop worrying, Mom.” But after that, he and his mother would work together, guilt-tripping me as the “bad one.” She would nag that a woman’s worth came from having kids, while Jim comforted me about our “love and quiet life together,” assuring me he preferred it this way. Eventually, I couldn’t take his pleas and gave in to the idea of adoption. The very next day, Mary brought Liam over herself. “This boy is already five, and I’ve met him at the foster home. He’s quiet and obedient, no trouble at all,” she’d said. “You two work a lot; if he were one of those rowdy kids, you’d never manage!” All the paperwork was in order, and I welcomed Liam home with a smile. Every evening when I came home from work, he’d hand me a glass of water, saying, “Here, Mommy, drink.” His voice was so gentle it melted my heart. Jim would smile proudly, saying we were blessed. While I cooked, Liam would help pick vegetables, already acting eager to please. I figured he’d endured a lot in foster care, so I poured my affection into him. Whenever I could, I’d buy him new clothes or hold him when he woke up scared. But my parents were furious. “You can have your own kids, Grace! Why adopt someone else’s?” my dad scolded. “What if his birth mom shows up and tears your whole life apart?” I was stubborn. I believed Jim and I were soulmates, and I believed love could replace blood ties. I refused my parents’ advice and even cut them off when they continued to argue. Once Liam came along, Jim became softer with me, giving in to every request. “For Liam’s sake, could you ask around and help me get a permanent position at the transit department? Then I could support the family better,” he said. So, I passed on a promotion so Jim could get a foot in the door. When he got the news, he picked me up and twirled me around. “I’ll never forget what you’ve done for me, honey. I’ll take care of you and Liam, always.” I even used my connections to move Liam’s foster records to the city so he could attend the best elementary school. With a steady job, Jim rose from an hourly laborer to a railway attendant, doubling his income. Now he was always traveling, and every time school was out, he’d take Liam on study trips around the country while I stayed home handling the rest. Over the years, I became worn out. I thought my life would calm down once Liam was grown, but instead, I got the news that Jim was on his deathbed. Surrounded by family and friends, he urged Liam with his dying breath: “It’s time to bring your mom back, Liam. Take care of her.” I was right there, but it was as if no one saw me. My son, the one I’d raised, nodded with tears in his eyes. “I know, Dad. She’s suffered enough.” Only then did I realize I’d been the only one in the dark all these years. Jim had a son before our marriage, and that boy was Liam. His birth mother had lived just a floor above us, and Jim had been taking them on family trips all this time. Blinded by rage, I slapped Jim hard. Then I stumbled out of the hospital, too numb to notice the truck that would kill me moments later. But I opened my eyes and found myself back on that day again, with everyone pressuring me to adopt a child. This time, I laughed bitterly. “If I can have kids of my own, why would I adopt?” 02 I’d done everything for Jim, even gone on a hunger strike to marry him, believing I couldn’t live without him. Seeing me cold and detached now rattled him. “Mom’s just looking out for us,” he said, his face red. “What kind of wife are you, acting like this?” “A kid would make our family happier.” “Wasn’t it you who said you didn’t want me overworked and wanted a quiet life?” I interrupted. “If you’re lonely, why don’t we just get a dog?” Mary’s face went white. She shot Jim a look. Jim snapped, “How can you compare a dog to a kid?” “Dogs at least show loyalty, Jim. But adopt a kid, and you’re as likely to end up with an ingrate,” I said, flinging my fork down. “You’re still a temp worker, barely making enough to cover your parents, let alone a child. Get real.” Jim lost his temper but finally reached an agreement with me: he would wait to adopt until his job paid more than mine. I didn’t want to see this family ever again, but I couldn’t leave just yet without losing half of what I owned. I clenched my teeth and waited. Mary gave us both a forced smile, saying, “No need to argue over a kid. We’ll revisit it later.” The two of them left the apartment, but I trailed after them quietly, only to see them head upstairs to 203. They took out a key and let themselves in. Back home, I realized Mary had known all along about Jim’s affair and had helped hide it from me, waiting to snatch as much as she could. I let go of my habit of cleaning up after them, remembering I wasn’t their maid anymore. Instead, I threw out my old clothes and cheap cosmetics, determined to cut the last remnants of my past. When Jim returned, he looked at me in shock. “Why toss perfectly good stuff? Wasteful. I could help you save, you know.” Without even looking up, I replied, “I’m letting go of all the useless junk.” 03 Jim couldn’t handle my cold responses anymore. He muttered curses under his breath, stomping around the apartment. “Wasteful woman, acting high and mighty just because she makes a bit of money! Now she won’t even clean up the house!” Listening to him complain, I wondered how I ever believed he cared about me. I ignored him, pretended to take out the trash, and made my way down to a street corner with old flyers taped on the poles. I examined them closely until I found one that read, “Green Meadows Apartments, Unit 204 for rent.” “Hi, is this Unit 204 available for rent?” I asked when someone picked up. “Yes, that’s me! I’m glad you called!” a cheerful voice replied. We arranged to meet at a nearby diner. There, a middle-aged woman named Aunt Lucy showed up, her arms slightly plump, her smile warm. “Just call me Aunt Lucy. You’re the one looking to rent, right? I ask for the first three months’ rent upfront. It’s thirty dollars a month.” After signing the lease with her, I pocketed the keys to Unit 204. Then I hired an electrician to come by and drill a small hole in the living room wall that adjoined Unit 203. Through this gap, I installed a tiny device that would let me hear everything going on next door. Now, I wouldn’t have to set foot inside to hear every word that passed between Jim and his lover. That eavesdropping soon revealed everything I needed to know. Jim’s mistress Rachel had been living just above us for years. She was so familiar to me, yet I couldn’t place her face at first. But my heart broke all over again, realizing she’d been so close the entire time. With my plan in place, I told Jim I’d have to stay at my work dorm for a while due to an urgent project. I packed a small suitcase and moved out, hiding in a spot under a big tree, where I had a direct view of Rachel’s apartment window. A short while later, I saw Rachel hurrying back with a little boy in tow—young Liam, barely five years old at the time. The light flickered on in their apartment above, and I crept up to my new unit to listen. “Daddy, I missed you so much!” Liam’s small voice was so clear it was as if they were speaking in my living room. Jim’s voice answered. “Come here, little guy. Let me see if you’ve grown taller. Look how your mom takes such good care of you! Remember what Daddy told you?” “I remember,” Liam replied, his voice brimming with pride. “I’ll always remember how good my mom is to me, and one day, I’ll bring her home with me. Daddy, where are we going next?” “We’re not going anywhere far, kiddo,” Jim replied, laughing. “One day, you’ll live with Daddy and your other mom, but you’ll be close to your mom, too.” Rachel’s voice broke in, sounding tense. “Jim, you think adopting Liam will work? What if she finds out?” Jim’s voice turned harsh. “As long as Mom covers for us and we keep Liam in line, there won’t be any problems. Grace is always busy. She’ll barely notice when Liam’s around. I get the best of both worlds—I don’t have to take care of my mother or our son, but we’ll still be together as a family.” Rachel giggled, her voice suddenly coquettish. “I knew you always had me in your heart, Jim. By the way, the skincare products you bought last time are all gone. Can you see if you can get more? My skin feels so rough.” “You still look better than her, no matter what.” The sound of their laughter filled the room, and I could hear Liam’s childish giggle at the end. “Daddy and Mommy, kissing! So embarrassing!” I thought of all the times I’d gone without to make sure Jim and his mom had what they needed. I remembered all the cheap skincare I’d bought for myself, the work clothes I’d worn until they were frayed. All that money I’d saved had gone to support their little secret life. Sitting there listening, I felt a strange calm as I pressed “record” on the tape player. Once, I’d returned home from a work trip to see a strange woman playing with Liam in the park near our house. Jim waved it off, saying it was just the neighbor who found our son adorable. But now, I understood. They were a family, laughing and playing together like I was the outsider. 04 I tried to avoid bringing Liam home, thinking Jim would let it go. But I underestimated his persistence. He started spreading rumors to pressure me into adopting, knowing it was my biggest vulnerability. One night after work, I went to the cafeteria to grab dinner. But when I sat down, a few people got up and moved away, looking at me like I had some contagious disease. They whispered behind their hands, but I caught a few words. I grabbed my friend Jenny’s arm as she passed by. “Jenny, what’s going on? Why is everyone looking at me like that?” Jenny avoided my gaze, looking horrified. “Grace, don’t touch me! Your mother-in-law said you have some…infection that’s the reason you can’t have kids.” She lowered her voice. “People are saying…maybe it’s because of…you know, things you might have done when you were younger.” I was shaking with fury, but I knew I had to stay calm. Any sign of weakness would just give them more ammunition. That was exactly what Jim and Mary were hoping for. Just then, Jim showed up and started shouting down the gossipers, then turned to comfort me. “Grace, don’t listen to their nonsense. You know Mom means well. She’s just worried we won’t have anyone to take care of us when we’re old.” In front of the gathering crowd, I patted Jim on the shoulder, my voice loud and clear. “Who says we don’t have kids? Our daughter’s been living with your mom, and she’s six now. She’ll be moving in with us soon!” I smiled sweetly, “Honey, aren’t you thrilled?” I’d always taken Jim at his word, but now I was ready to make my own moves. If he wanted me to adopt so badly, I’d do it—but I’d bring in a child with my own blood.
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