Undying Love

I’m known as Jack Wilson’s number one doormat. Jack, the most popular guy in school and a notorious playboy, only keeps me around because I look somewhat like his dream girl, Emma Frost. He chased after Emma for two years, but she always looked down on him and eventually went abroad. Now, Jack uses every opportunity to humiliate me, his substitute. It’s his way of getting revenge on Emma, taking out his frustrations on me. Despite this treatment, I still take care of him and comply with his every whim. He once asked me, “Why are you so good to me? What are you after?” I couldn’t help but laugh. What could I possibly want from him? “I want your heart, of course!” I replied. “My heart? Now that’s asking for too much!” he scoffed. What Jack doesn’t know is that I’m after his actual heart – his physical organ – not his affection for me. I pushed open the door to the bar’s private room, carrying a birthday cake. All eyes turned to me as the noise inside suddenly died down. Jack, with his arm around a girl in a mini skirt, spoke impatiently, “What took you so long to buy a cake? Everyone’s been waiting to celebrate Chloe’s birthday.” I set the cake down on the table and smoothed my wind-tousled hair. “There was some traffic,” I explained. My response was met with a round of mockery from the others. “Jack, man, you’ve got her so well-trained!” “I need to learn your secrets, bro!” Ever since I transferred to Southern University in my junior year to be close to Jack, his friends have called me his doormat. They say I changed schools just for him. They’re right about that part… They also say Jack only agreed to be with me because I look somewhat like Emma Frost. Emma was his dream girl, the one he chased for two years without success before she went abroad. Jack opened the cake box and lit the candles. He pulled Chloe close and told her to make a wish. “I wish Jack would take me to see the ocean,” Chloe said dreamily. Someone teased, “Saying it out loud means it won’t come true!” Chloe turned to Jack with her big, beautiful eyes. “Jack, do you think my wish will come true?” Jack kissed her cheek and glanced at me from the corner of his eye. “Of course it will. We’ll go this Saturday.” He added with a mischievous grin, “We’ll camp on the beach overnight. I’ll bring a tent to set up on the sand.” Chloe shyly kissed Jack in return. Jack then turned to me, sitting in the corner. “Sophia, make sure you buy a tent before Saturday.” “Okay,” I replied. “And get a thick, soft mat too. Chloe’s delicate skin won’t be able to handle lying directly on the ground.” “Alright,” I agreed. The group erupted in laughter. “Now that’s a dedicated doormat! She’ll agree to anything!” “Jack, you’ve got some serious skills!” Chloe nestled into Jack’s arms, embarrassed. I stared at the spot over Jack’s heart. He shouldn’t let Chloe lean there. That’s mine… A sharp pain shot through my chest. I closed my eyes, fighting back tears. The reason I stay by Jack’s side is because I like being close to his chest, listening to his strong heartbeat. It’s a soothing remedy for my pain, a comfort during sleepless nights of agony. After they finished singing, the group decided to go for hot pot. I followed behind Jack. When I saw Chloe pour Jack a glass of beer, I quickly took it away. “The doctor said you can’t drink alcohol.” Jack looked up at me, sitting across from him. “If I can’t drink it, then you drink it!” The others chimed in, “Yeah, Jack said so. Drink up!” I didn’t want to drink, but seeing Jack’s displeased expression, I picked up the glass and downed it in one go. I never upset him, not even the slightest bit. The doctor had said his emotions shouldn’t fluctuate too much. Seeing him reach for the spicy broth, I reminded him, “You also can’t eat spicy or stimulating food.” Someone teased, “Jack, she’s already acting like a nagging wife before you’re even married!” Jack raised an eyebrow. “Who said I was going to eat it? Our Chloe loves spicy food.” He picked up a slice of lamb and fed it to Chloe. The group laughed again. “Jack likes hot and sexy girls like Chloe. Much better than the plain and boring type!” The speaker glanced at me as he said this. “Jack’s got great taste, that’s for sure!” …

On Saturday, Zoe and I waited outside the boys’ dormitory with two tents, ready for Jack. Zoe is my roommate and my best friend at Southern University. When I first met her, I felt drawn to her. There was something familiar about her, as if we’d met before. Jack came out of the dorm building with his arm around a petite figure whose face was hidden by a baseball cap. As they got closer, I realized it was a girl. She was even wearing Jack’s baseball jacket. Seeing them, Zoe got angry on my behalf. She confronted Jack, “Who is she? You’re supposed to be taking Sophia to the beach, and now you’re bringing another girl? And she’s so shameless, going into the boys’ dorm!” I regretted not telling Zoe earlier that Jack was bringing Chloe. But this wasn’t even Chloe. The girl glanced at Zoe and snuggled closer to Jack. In a coy voice, she said, “Jack, she’s so mean. I’m scared.” Jack patted her head and snapped back at Zoe, “If Sophia doesn’t mind, why should you care? You’re not even involved. Aren’t you just tagging along uninvited?” I stepped in front of Zoe. “I insisted that Zoe come. You can treat me however you want, but don’t talk to Zoe like that!” Seeing that I was genuinely upset, Jack’s tone softened slightly. “She started it. But fine, I’ll be the bigger person and let it go.” Zoe tried to argue further, but I quickly pulled her away. “Come on, Zoe, let’s go. Just think of it as accompanying me to the beach. Don’t let this ruin your mood.” As we walked away, Zoe said, “I can’t stand to see you treated like this! What’s so great about that two-timing jerk that you have to put up with this?” I replied softly, “He may not be good, but his heart is good…” “Huh?” Zoe looked confused, but I didn’t explain further. Southern University isn’t far from the beach, so we took a taxi. By early evening, the beach was crowded with campers, mostly college students out for fun. I had just finished setting up the two tents when I overheard two girls talking nearby. “Did you hear about that incredibly handsome guy from your school who got into a car accident recently?” “Yeah, he was a genius too, top of his class in every subject!” “Such a tragedy… What was his name again?” “Ethan Sky…” When I heard that name, my blood ran cold. My heart felt like it was being torn apart, and I couldn’t breathe. I watched the sun slowly disappear below the horizon, leaving behind a darkening sky. Just like my world without him – pitch black. I had lost him forever.

I crouched down, hugging my knees, as tears soaked the sand beneath me. I remembered another evening like this when he had built a sandcastle on the beach. He had been so secretive, not letting me see it until it was finished. He had covered my eyes with his hands and led me to the castle. With a dramatic flair, he had announced, “Ta-da! Miss Thompson, behold your future home! One day, I’ll buy a house just like this castle and bring my princess home…” But later, the sea washed away the castle, and he left me too… Zoe returned with firewood and was startled to see me in such a state. She quickly hugged me. “Sophia, what’s wrong? Did those two jerks upset you?” “I’m going to give them a piece of my mind!” she declared, ready to confront Jack and his new girl, who were making out in the distance. I held her back. “No, Zoe, it’s not because of them. I’m not feeling well. Can we go back to school?” We got into a taxi back to campus. Zoe sat with me in the back seat. Knowing I didn’t want to talk about it, she just held me close, gently rubbing my back. It reminded me of how Ethan used to comfort me whenever I was sad… I felt the warmth from her, and surprisingly, the pain in my heart began to ease. Back at our dorm, Zoe gave me her large panda plushie to sleep with, saying it would help me sleep. She meant well, so I couldn’t refuse. I lay in bed, hugging the panda and staring at the ceiling. I thought it would be another sleepless night, like so many before when I longed for Ethan. But somehow, I eventually fell into a deep sleep.

That night, I had a long dream. I dreamed of the sweet memories from when we first met. When I was in kindergarten, new neighbors moved in next door. They had a son a year younger than me. From the day they arrived, I had a little shadow with a runny nose following me around. Every day when I went to kindergarten, he wanted to come too, but the teachers wouldn’t let him in. So he begged his mom to let him go to kindergarten as well. I remember when I first started kindergarten, I cried my heart out every day, missing my mom terribly. But Ethan, from the day he started, never cried. He just happily followed me around. Because he was younger, the teachers gave him special treatment. Whenever he said he wanted to find his “big sister,” they would let him sit next to me. Even though he was in the toddler class, he learned everything we did in the junior class, and he learned it faster than me. He even helped me with the crafts the teacher assigned, so I could finish them. During games, while others paired up one-on-one, we were always a team of two against one… This went on, with him skipping grades to be with me in kindergarten. When I graduated and was about to start elementary school, he still had one more year of kindergarten left. Every day when he went to kindergarten then, he cried his heart out, worrying his mom to no end. His classmates in the senior kindergarten class teased him: “How come you’re still not used to it after three years? We stopped crying in our first year!” Ethan, sniffling, replied, “I got used to having my sister with me for three years in kindergarten. Now I’m all alone, that’s why I’m sad.” Finally, Ethan started elementary school, but this time the teachers wouldn’t let him sit with me in the second-grade classroom. So every break, he’d run to my classroom, bringing me snacks, stickers that little girls liked, and all sorts of little trinkets. He spent all his pocket money on me. My classmates all thought he was my real brother and called him the “sister-doting maniac.” Later, when I started middle school, Ethan’s family had to move away due to his father’s job transfer.

The night before they left, Ethan knocked on my window with a bamboo pole from his family’s small balcony. Our balconies were right next to each other, close enough that we could talk from them. Our families got along well too. My dad would grill kebabs on the balcony and pass some to Ethan. Ethan’s dad would brew tea on a small stove on their balcony and offer a cup to my dad. After Ethan called me out, he handed me a letter. His ears were red as he said, “Wait until I’m gone tomorrow to open it.” I asked why I had to wait until he left to read it. He stammered for a while but couldn’t give me an answer. Seeing he wasn’t saying anything, I thought the conversation was over. I was about to go back inside to continue reading my romance novel. I had just gotten to the part where the heroine runs away pregnant, and I was curious if the clueless hero would be able to find her. As I turned to leave, Ethan called out loudly, “Sophia, wait for me. I’ll definitely come back for you.” I replied, “Okay, don’t come empty-handed.” It was meant as a joke, but he took it seriously. When we met again, he really didn’t come empty-handed. That was on the first day of our freshman year in college. The young man stood under a phoenix tree, holding a large box in both hands. He wore a clean white shirt and jeans. The sunlight filtering through the leaves cast a glow on him. When he saw me approach, his smile was brighter than the sunshine. When Ethan’s family left, I was actually very sad, but I didn’t show it. I didn’t want to make the atmosphere too gloomy, and it wasn’t like we’d never see each other again. I didn’t go down to see them off, but instead watched from the balcony as their car drove further and further away. It felt like a piece of my heart was missing… Ah, I would never again taste Ethan’s mom’s sweet and sour pork ribs, meatballs, fish, or pork loin… Ethan’s mom had tried to teach my mom, but with my mom’s cooking skills, she nearly burned down the kitchen. I went back to my room and opened Ethan’s letter. After reading it, I was angry! I had thought of him as a little brother, but he didn’t see me as a sister. He even wrote about wanting to rightfully call my mom “Mom” in the future! At that time, I was obsessed with romance novels. I imagined men who could sweep me off my feet and pin me against a wall, saying, “Woman, you can’t escape me.” When I thought of Ethan, who was even younger than me, I wondered if his skinny arms could even lift me. In novels, the men were always older, experienced guys falling for younger women. I was still waiting for my mature man to come along. Back then, I never would have imagined that this scrawny boy, who dreamed of calling my mom “Mom,” would one day sacrifice his life to protect me. His departure left me with a pain that cut to the bone. I hated that truck driver who had fallen asleep at the wheel! In my mind, I was back to that day…

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