Trash For A Trash Marriage

1 I told my husband to take the trash out on his way, but our bag was still sitting right by our front door. Instead, I watched him effortlessly pick up the leaking bag in front of our neighbor’s apartment. He offered his usual smooth explanation. “It was on the way. Besides, she’s your best friend’s sister.” My neighbor was Stella, my best friend’s older sister. She was also a single mother. Every single time my husband stepped in to help her, he pulled out the exact same line: “She’s your best friend’s sister.” Even Harper, my best friend, would back him up, telling me I was making a mountain out of a molehill. Yet he only ever noticed Stella’s needs. Mine were completely invisible to him. Even when I practically screamed for help, he was deaf to it. For ten long years, I asked him countless times to take out the trash. He never did it once. Yet for ten solid years, he carried Stella’s trash down the hall every single day without fail. I stood there, staring at the kitchen waste that had begun to rot in the summer heat. It smelled just like our ten year marriage. I tied up the foul bag and threw it away myself. Next on my list was this rotten marriage. … That night, I brought up divorce to Derek. I had mentally prepared for every possible reaction from him, but what actually happened caught me completely off guard. Without a word, he rushed straight to the living room closet to grab his toolbox. “Babe, whatever it is, let’s talk later,” he blurted out, heading for the front door. “Stella’s overhead light is flickering. I need to go fix it.” Toolbox in hand, he didn’t even pause. “After all, she’s your best friend’s sister.” I watched his back as he hurried away, a sharp, stabbing pain blooming in my chest. A light bulb at Stella’s place was a crisis of monumental proportions to him. My request for a divorce did not even register. I clenched my fists so hard my nails dug into my palms. “Don’t go!” Derek frowned, looking back at me with a flash of annoyance, as if I were delaying something vital. “Stop throwing a fit, babe.” “Stella is a single mother raising a kid alone. Her lights are out. What do you expect her to do?” There it was again. That exact sentence. Whether it was moving furniture, picking up packages, or even peeling fruit for Stella, Derek was always first in line. He catered to her every tiny inconvenience with terrifying devotion. And every time, he would recite: “What do you expect a single mother to do?” Yet when it came to our own home, he was blind to everything. Faucets, light fixtures, clogged drains, I fixed every single one of them myself. He would make vague promises to handle them, but he never moved a finger. Even my best friend, Harper, used that same excuse to lecture me. “Come on, my sister has it so hard raising a boy on her own. Just let your husband help them out a bit.” “Can you stop overreacting for once?” Was I really overreacting? I watched Derek sprint across the hall toward Stella’s open door with an urgency he had never once shown for me. When I accidentally sliced my finger while chopping vegetables, he didn’t even turn his head from the TV. “Slap a Band-Aid on it.” When a heavy box fell off the top closet shelf and bruised my shoulder, he merely glanced up. “You okay?” Yet here he was, tearing out of the house just to fix a single light bulb, terrified that a single second might be wasted. I sat on the living room sofa for two full hours. When Derek finally walked back inside, I didn’t hesitate. “I want a divorce.” He poured himself a glass of water, took a slow drink, and only then seemed to process what I had said. His expression turned into one of pure bewilderment. “What are you talking about?” “I go fix one light bulb and you want to split up?” I looked down at the faint scar on my knee, left behind the last time I climbed a ladder to fix a light myself. “It’s about the trash, too.” “You never carried out a single bag for me, but you take hers out every day.” Derek let out a short, incredulous laugh. “Do you even hear yourself right now?” “We’re in our thirties, Hazel. We’re not insecure twenty-year-olds anymore.” “Are you seriously getting jealous over something this pathetic?” Before I could reply, the front door clicked open. Stella stood in the entryway, looking pale and terrified, clutching her cardigan to her chest. “Derek, are you guys fighting because of me?” She immediately turned toward me, her voice trembling with desperate apology. “Hazel, please don’t be mad at Derek.” “It’s all my fault. I’m just so useless at handling house stuff, so I always end up bothering him.” “If you’re going to blame anyone, blame me.” Tears trickled down her cheeks right on cue. I stared at our front door in utter shock. Stella knew the keycode to my home. She had punched it in with effortless familiarity. How did she get it? Even my best friend didn’t know our door code. The answer was sitting right in front of me. Derek was already at her side, gently wiping away her tears, his eyes filled with tender concern. Because of Stella’s tears, Harper rushed over in the middle of the night. The three of them sat together on my living room sofa, with Stella sandwiched right in the middle. Derek and Harper took turns telling jokes, doing everything they could to make her smile again. I sat on a single dining chair nearby like an absolute outsider, watching the spectacle unfold. A bitter realization washed over me. It had always been like this. Whenever the four of us were together, this was the dynamic. If I needed to go shopping, the trip would somehow end with Derek and Harper picking out clothes and home goods for Stella. If we went to the movies and couldn’t get four seats in a row, the lone seat in the back was always mine. The three of them would sit together. One would feed Stella popcorn, while the other handed her a drink. When the movie ended, they would walk out chatting and laughing about the plot, completely forgetting that I was trailing behind them. Every single time, I was the one running to catch up. I was the one forcing myself into a group that didn’t want me. Not anymore. Finally, Stella let out a soft giggle, put at ease by their frantic efforts. Derek and Harper simultaneously let out a long sigh of relief. Then Harper turned to me, her expression instantly souring. “I think you owe my sister an apology, Hazel.” Even Derek chimed in, his tone scolding. “Babe, you really scared Stella tonight.” “She’s fragile. She can’t handle seeing people fight.” “Just apologize to her.” I sat there, utterly speechless. I was in my own house, having a private argument with my own husband. What on earth did I do wrong? It was Stella who had unlocked my front door and barged into my home uninvited. Seeing my silence, Harper’s face darkened further. “Don’t make this so ugly, Hazel.” “We’ve been best friends for twenty years. Can’t you even apologize to my sister for my sake?” Right. Because Stella was my best friend’s sister, I had apologized to her dozens of times over the years. When she saw our wedding photos on the living room wall and burst into tears, Harper demanded I apologize for reminding Stella of her failed marriage. I not only apologized, I packed away every single wedding photo in the house. When she saw me buying baby clothes for my own pregnancy, she cried again. Harper accused me of showing off that my baby would have a father, while Stella’s son didn’t. I apologized again. And back then, Harper even had the nerve to suggest: “Maybe you shouldn’t have this baby. Otherwise, every time my sister sees your child with a dad, she’s going to cry for her own kid.” Even Derek had lapsed into a thoughtful silence when Harper said that, as if he genuinely thought it was a reasonable point. Back then, I naively thought Stella was just pitiable, so everyone felt protective of her. Now I finally understood the truth. They didn’t care about pity. They cared about Stella, and they completely erased me. I placed my hand over my lower abdomen, feeling the faint, gentle flutter inside. My resolve hardened into steel. I was divorcing Derek. I would not bring my child into a world where these people could walk all over them. My child would not be sacrificed just because Stella’s son didn’t have a father. I slowly uncurled my fists, revealing deep, red crescent marks etched into my palms. “I want a divorce,” I repeated, my voice quiet and unwavering. Harper’s face changed instantly. Without another word, she and Derek escorted Stella back across the hall. When Harper returned to my living room a few minutes later, her expression was furious. “What is wrong with you, Hazel?” “Just because Derek took out her trash and fixed a light bulb, you’re demanding a divorce? And you had to say all that right in front of my sister?” Derek sighed heavily from the doorway. “You really crossed the line this time.” “Throwing a tantrum in our own home and terrifying an innocent person.” I looked at the two people standing before me. One was my husband of ten years. The other was my best friend since childhood. A cold, mocking laugh escaped my lips. It was all so utterly pointless. I didn’t waste another word on them. I turned and walked straight into the bedroom, locking the door behind me. If Derek refused to sign the papers, I would simply hire a lawyer. Late that night, Derek slipped into bed and wrapped his arms around me from behind, letting out a long, weary sigh. “Alright, babe, stop being mad.” “I’ll take out our trash from now on, okay? Just stop throwing around the word divorce.” Was he actually trying to fix things? Just as I opened my mouth to speak, he continued softly against my ear. “By the way, babe… I’m thinking about becoming Toby’s godfather.” “That five-year-old kid has no father around. It’s just devastating to watch.” “Don’t overthink it, okay? It’s just… you have no idea how happy he gets every time he sees me…” Toby was Stella’s son. I ripped myself out of his grip, staring at him in complete horror. “What did you just say?” “You want to be his godfather? What about our baby?” What about the child growing inside me right now? Derek had never once gently rubbed my belly. He had never spoken a single word to my bump. I had assumed he was just nervous about becoming a father for the first time. Now I realized the truth. His heart and mind were entirely consumed by Stella. Even Stella’s son mattered more to him than his own blood. Looking at his guilty silence, my heart plummeted into a dark, bottomless pit. Ten years of marriage, rendered an absolute joke. We slept on opposite edges of the mattress that night, neither of us uttering another word. The next afternoon, Harper came over to the apartment carrying a bakery box. She offered a sweet, apologetic smile. “Don’t be mad anymore, Hazel. I was just stressed yesterday.” “Today is your birthday! Let’s go out for a nice lunch to celebrate!” She pulled me out the door and led me to a restaurant nearby. Derek was already seated at a table, having ordered a full spread of my favorite dishes. They sat on either side of me, wishing me a happy birthday. Until Stella walked into the dining room. I knew then that my birthday celebration was officially over. The moment she sat down, she announced excitedly, “I have amazing news, everyone!” “I’m pregnant!” With tears of joy in her eyes, she pulled out a medical confirmation sheet. Before the paper even hit the table, Derek and Harper had both abandoned their seats to crowd around her. “Congratulations, sis!” “We have to celebrate this!” “Oh, look, we even have a cake right here!” Harper picked up my birthday cake and placed it directly in front of her sister. Derek lit the candles and smiled warmly at Stella. “Quick, make a wish! Wish for a healthy, happy baby!” Stella closed her eyes, holding her hands together in prayer. When she blew out the candles, Derek and Harper clapped enthusiastically. I sat alone in the corner of the booth, watching them share their joy. I was used to it. For the past ten years, I had never once gotten to blow out my own candles or eat my own birthday cake. Every single year on my birthday, Stella would magically show up with some marvelous piece of news to share. A flower she planted had finally bloomed. A boutique she liked had opened a new branch. She had managed to buy a limited-edition coat online. No matter how trivial her news was, they would hijack my day to celebrate her. My birthday cake inevitably became her celebration cake. Except this year, her grand news wasn’t some minor detail. “Who’s the father?” I asked, my voice cutting through their laughter. Everyone turned to look at me, as if they had only just realized another human being was sitting at the table. Stella pulled a playful face. “It’s a secret!” I didn’t push further. I stood up and walked to the restroom. When I stepped back into the dining area, the booth was completely empty. All that remained was a table of leftover food and the unpaid bill. A bitter smile touched my lips. This was my birthday, exactly like every year before it. After settling the bill, I walked out of the restaurant to look for them. As I turned the corner down the hallway near the private rooms, I caught the sound of Derek’s voice. “Stella, why didn’t you tell me about the pregnancy earlier?” Stella replied softly, “I only found out today.” “What are we going to do, Derek? What about Hazel?” My mind went completely blank. What did she mean, what about Hazel? What on earth did her pregnancy have to do with me? Then Derek spoke again, his tone resolute. “Don’t be scared, Stella. I’ll lay it all out for Hazel.” “I’ll tell her the baby is mine, and that I’m going to take full responsibility.” A loud bang resonated in my ears, and my world spun on its axis. So Derek’s constant care and devotion toward Stella hadn’t been driven by sympathy at all. They were having an affair. What shook me to my core, however, was Harper’s response. “It’s fine, sis. Don’t back down now.” “I’ve watched you and Derek all these years. If you ask me, the one who isn’t loved is the real intruder.” Those words detonated right in my ears. My blood ran cold, freezing in my veins. The same Harper who had once fiercely warned Derek that he would be dead meat if he ever cheated on me was now declaring that the unloved wife was the real homewrecker. No wonder no one at the table had asked who the father was. They knew all along. I was the only fool kept completely in the dark, allowing them to mock me for years. My husband of ten years and my best friend of twenty years had joined hands to destroy me. Despite the scorching summer heat outside, I shook violently from a chilling cold. I couldn’t even remember how I dragged my trembling body back home. When I stepped through the door, Derek was busy in the kitchen. “Stella is pregnant now, so we need to step up and take extra care of her from here on out.” Ten minutes later, he placed a freshly sliced plate of fruit into a container, preparing to walk it across the hall. I grabbed his arm, tears finally spilling over. “I’m pregnant too.” Why was I never treated with this level of tenderness? Why had neither of them ever cared for me like this? Derek shoved my arm away with an impatient scowl. “Stop throwing fits, Hazel!” “It’s just a plate of fruit. Do you really have to compete with Stella over everything?” With that, he turned and walked out the door. Before Stella became our neighbor, Derek had been attentive and sweet to me. Now, every ounce of his care and affection belonged exclusively to Stella. What was the point of holding onto a marriage like this? I grabbed the divorce papers from my bag and walked across the hall to Stella’s apartment. Her five-year-old son, Toby, opened the door. Neither Stella nor Derek was in the living room. Only the bedroom door at the end of the hall was tightly shut. A wave of intense nausea hit my stomach. Before I could move, Toby suddenly sprinted forward and shoved me hard. “You bad woman! Who allowed you into my house to steal my daddy!” The sudden push threw me off balance. My heel caught on a hard plastic toy ball on the floor. I tumbled backward, crashing violently onto the floor. A sharp, unbearable agony exploded in my lower abdomen. Through the blinding pain, I watched the bedroom door remain firmly closed. When I opened my eyes again, I was lying in a sterile hospital bed. My baby was gone. An hour later, the three of them walked into my hospital room together. Before any of them could speak, I handed the signed divorce papers directly to Derek. “Sign it.” “I’m setting you both free.” Just moments ago, I had received a formal job offer from a major firm in New York. My flight was already booked.

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