At dinner, Mom always tossed Dad a bowl and made him crouch by the table to eat, like a dog. She said men who cheated didn’t deserve a seat at the table. Dad always looked at her with quiet remorse and lowered himself down without a word. Sometimes, watching him hunched on the floor in his sharp-tailored suit, scraping at his food, a flicker of something soft would cross Mom’s eyes. Then came Dad’s birthday. That day, Mom smiled, which was rare, and told me a secret: I was going to have a little sister. She bought a big cake and set it on the table, ready to share the good news with Dad, ready to let the past turn a page. But when Dad came home, he brought Mom’s best friend Rachel with him, along with a little boy who looked about three. The boy called out timidly, “Daddy.” Dad’s back was straight for once. He wasn’t avoiding her eyes the way he usually did. “Lucas is my son with Rachel. I’m bringing him home.” Mom’s face went white. The wine glass slipped from her hand and shattered on the floor. … Mom walked over quietly. Dad instinctively stepped in front of Rachel and the little boy. But Mom only reached up and placed the birthday hat on his head. She patted his shoulder. She said nothing. Then she took my hand. She was going to take me out of that house. I could feel how cold her palm was. I knew, in that moment, that whatever had tied her to this home was gone. “Claire—” Rachel chased after us and blocked the way. Her eyes were red, tears clinging to her cheeks. She looked more heartbroken than Mom did. “You… blame me, if you have to blame someone.” Her hands were shaking as she reached for Mom, who pulled away. I had seen Mom and Rachel at their closest, curled up together under one blanket watching a movie, both of their faces lit with the same bright laughter. Now there was an invisible wall between them. “Daniel didn’t cheat. He doesn’t love me. I begged him…” “I just wanted to help. I couldn’t stand watching the two of you drift apart because of a child…” She caught Mom’s hand, tears spilling down her face. “Rachel. We’ve known each other for twenty years.” Mom’s voice was quiet. “Put your hand on your heart and tell me. When you slid into bed with Daniel, when you got pregnant with his child, did you think of me? Even once?” Rachel’s mouth opened, closed. Tears ran into her lips. She didn’t answer. “You didn’t.” Mom said it flatly. I looked up at her. Her eyes held nothing but a still, frozen calm. “Claire, I did! I thought about you!” Rachel was crying harder now. “From now on, my child will be your child too. We can all live together. If you’re not happy, I…” She glanced back at Dad, biting her lip. “I can crouch and eat with Daniel, too.” Before Mom could speak, Dad exploded. “Enough!” He shoved Mom hard. She stumbled and slammed into the corner of the table. A quiet, pained sound escaped her lips. Dad planted himself in front of Rachel and glared at Mom. “You’ve humiliated me enough. Don’t you dare lay a finger on Rachel or Lucas.” Mom stood there, head bent, spine curved, unable to straighten up for a long time. I squeezed her hand, worried. Then, after a long silence, she gave a low, broken laugh. “Now you call it humiliation? Daniel, this is what you owe me.” Her head snapped up. The whites of her eyes were shot through with red as she stared him down. “Or have you forgotten?”
At those words, Dad froze. Rachel’s face crumpled with something like guilt. I knew exactly what Mom was talking about. I had been very small then, but I remembered. I had seen her, drenched in blood, with my own eyes. Mom was the only heir to the Whitfield Group. Not long after I was born, she went back to work. The company was in the middle of a major restructuring, and it couldn’t run without her at the helm as CEO. Grandmother waited until Mom wasn’t home, and had Dad quietly take me out to the old family estate in the countryside. I was terrified of this strange place. I cried and cried for Mom, but Grandmother ignored me, and didn’t give me any food. The sky grew completely dark. Then she brought out a large bowl. It was too heavy for me to lift. Inside was some milk, grayish, with tiny specks of dust floating on the surface. I was starving. I got down on my knees, stuck out my tongue, and lapped at the milk, clumsy, one lick at a time. Like a puppy. That was when Mom arrived. The moment she saw it, something in her broke. She rushed over, scooped me up, and turned to run. Grandmother stopped her. She turned back, shoved the front door shut, and let the bolt drop with a heavy thud. “You worthless thing. What’s the rush?” Mom didn’t answer. She just held me tighter and watched the old woman warily. “The Whitfields have a whole empire. What good is a girl?” Grandmother’s mouth curled downward with contempt. “A family needs more than one child. Fine, Daniel doesn’t have the stomach for it. It doesn’t matter…” She paused, and smiled. “He has an older brother.” Mom’s face drained of color. I could feel her heart racing, and I started to cry. Heavy footsteps came from behind us. A man shambled out of the back room. There was something wrong with him. Drool hung from the corner of his mouth, dripping down in slow beads. When he saw Mom, his eyes lit up. “Baby… Baby…” He lurched toward her. Mom scrambled to get out of the way, and while she was distracted, Grandmother snatched me from her arms. “Please, calm down. I have money. I can pay to have him treated. Just don’t touch Lily…” Mom’s voice, always so composed, was breaking with panic as she pleaded. “Treat him?” Grandmother laughed coldly. “He can’t be fixed. And I’ve stopped trying.” “Give him a child. That way I’ve done right by my firstborn.” She stepped back and tilted her head toward the door behind her. “Go with Marcus. Otherwise, you can forget about taking this girl anywhere.” Mom looked at the old woman, then at me. Her eyes were red. “Mother, I’ll go. Just don’t hurt Lily. She’s your granddaughter too.” The door closed. I didn’t dare cry. I didn’t dare move. I could only stare, frozen, at that dark doorway. It felt as though the door had swallowed my mother whole. I don’t know how long it was before Dad came. He broke down the door and carried Mom out, soaked in blood. Rachel picked me up. Her hands shook, and her eyes burned with hate.
After that, Mom was in the hospital for a long time. Every day I waited for her to come home. I missed her so much. But the mother who came back was not the one I had known. She was quiet now. Nothing interested her. She didn’t run the household. She didn’t ask about the company. Only when Dad was in the room did something ignite in her, and it was pure hatred. Rachel came often to sit with her, but nothing anyone did could make her smile again. Until my birthday. That was the happiest day I can remember. For one day, Mom seemed like her old self. She took me shopping for a beautiful princess dress. She made a little crown for me with her own hands. She invited Dad and Rachel over, and the four of us had a warm, quiet birthday at home. Mom’s smile was so soft. I thought maybe everything was going to be all right. But the next day, all of it shattered. I woke to the sound of voices in the living room. I peeked through the crack of the door. Dad was on his knees. Mom stood over him, clutching a shirt. “Daniel. Whose lipstick is on this collar?” Dad kept his head down and said nothing. Mom threw the shirt in his face. Her voice came out hoarse, like it wasn’t hers. “Have you been sleeping with someone else? How could you do this to me?” He still didn’t answer. But from that day on, Dad never sat at our table again. “Rachel. I lied to myself for years. I couldn’t let myself believe that the woman he was seeing was you.” “I would rather have been wrong than have to prove it.” Mom’s eyes glistened as she stared at Rachel. Rachel sank to the floor, shoulders trembling. Whatever guilt had lived in Dad’s eyes vanished. “Claire, that’s enough. Rachel is already suffering. What more do you want?” “When it comes down to it, wasn’t going in there your own choice?” “For you, I had my own mother sent to prison. I accepted that.” “But you’re not exactly clean either. What gives you the right to look down on us?” Mom’s head snapped up. The hatred in her eyes could have burned them alive. The room fell silent. Rachel slowly got to her feet. “Claire, stop pushing me. I don’t want to destroy what you two have. I’ll leave!” She grabbed the little boy and rushed out of the house like a gust of wind.
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