On the first day of freshman orientation, I happily arrived with some local specialties, eager to share them with my new roommates. However, I never expected that right after introducing myself, the three roommates would suddenly push me out the door, adamantly refusing to share a room with me. They even took the issue straight to our resident advisor. The RA had no choice but to quickly arrange a new room for me. But as soon as I reached the doorway of my new room, before I could even push my luggage inside, I faced fierce resistance from these new roommates as well. They wouldn’t even let me through the door, claiming they would rather drop out of college than live in the same room as me. I was utterly baffled, thinking someone must have said something bad about me. But I had never offended anyone, and after scouring our class SnapChat group, the university forums, and confession pages, I couldn’t find any gossip about me. When I asked other classmates, they would chat with me normally at first, but as soon as they heard I might become their roommate, their expressions would instantly change. Yet no one would tell me why.
“Professor, we absolutely refuse to be his roommate.” “Yeah, if you force us to room with him, I’ll drop out.” “Well…” Seeing his attempts to persuade the students were futile, the RA gave me a helpless look. “I’m sorry everyone, but could you please tell me why?” I asked tentatively. “I promise I’m very easy to get along with. I lived in dorms in high school too and was never any trouble.” I carefully grabbed one of the students, hoping he would explain. But he just glanced at me and shook off my hand. “There’s no reason. We just absolutely refuse to be your roommate.” I slumped against the doorway, looking at my still-unpacked luggage, feeling utterly defeated. I had always been an introverted and quiet person. Though I didn’t have many friends, I had never made enemies either. I couldn’t understand why in this new city, at this new school, facing complete strangers – everyone was so resistant and unwilling to be my roommate. “I’m sorry, River. We really can’t find any students willing to room with you right now,” the RA said gently. “The school doesn’t have any single rooms available. Why don’t you stay at a hotel for now, and I’ll keep trying to arrange something else.” “Don’t worry, the other students probably just have some misunderstanding about you. Once they get to know you better, I’m sure it will all work out.” The RA patted me on the back reassuringly. Right, maybe someone had spread rumors about me? The RA’s words gave me an idea. I immediately went to check our class SnapChat group, the university forums, and confession pages again. But even after scrolling through every message, I couldn’t find a single word about me. Plus, I was the only student from my high school who got into this university. There shouldn’t be anyone who knew me well enough to spread rumors. As I was utterly perplexed, someone called out to me in the classroom. “River, what a coincidence! I didn’t know we were in the same class.” I looked up to see Zack, the first person I had met at this school. I only knew him because he had nearly fainted from low blood sugar on move-in day. I had given him a drink and some snacks, which helped him recover. We were both busy moving in that day, so we just quickly exchanged contact info before parting ways. I had no idea we’d end up as classmates. “Zack, does your room have any empty beds? Could I possibly be your roommate?” I asked hopefully, clinging to him like a lifeline.
I had just helped him recently, so he should know what kind of person I am. Even if someone had spread rumors, he probably wouldn’t believe them. As it happened, the RA and I had checked almost every room, except for the very last one. I had given up hope by then and didn’t bother checking. Who would have thought Zack was in that final room? I waited expectantly for Zack to nod. But to my surprise, as soon as he heard I wanted to be his roommate, his expression changed completely. “No way. Our room is already full,” he said coldly. “They definitely won’t agree to room with you.” Zack’s friendly smile vanished, replaced by a wary look. “Zack, why? Why won’t you room with me?” I asked desperately. “You know I’m not a bad person!” I grabbed Zack’s arm, no longer hoping to be his roommate. I just wanted to know the reason – I could change if I knew what was wrong. But he yanked his arm away forcefully. “There’s no reason. We just don’t want to room with you.” Feeling helpless, I could only turn to the internet for advice. Why wouldn’t a single classmate accept me as a roommate? Helpful netizens quickly offered many possible explanations. “Maybe someone said you have a contagious disease?” I stared at this comment, suddenly enlightened. Recently, many schools had announced they would be admitting some HIV-positive students. To prevent discrimination, they wouldn’t disclose who these students were. Could it be that someone had spread a rumor implying I had a contagious disease? I immediately made an appointment for a full medical checkup at the hospital. I got tested for every possible infectious disease. After anxiously waiting a few days, the test results finally came back. They showed I was negative for everything – I had no infectious diseases at all. Excitedly, I projected the results onto a big screen. To prevent anyone from suspecting I had photoshopped them, I even logged into the hospital system on the spot to show my electronic medical records again. I thought this would clear up the misunderstanding and someone would finally accept me as a roommate. But to my dismay, after asking every classmate, still not a single person was willing to room with me. “Maybe they think you have mental health issues?” someone suggested when I posted about my situation online again. Once more, I went to the hospital and underwent a psychological evaluation. The results showed my mental health was perfectly normal, with no issues whatsoever. Again, I displayed the results to my classmates. I even got several of my childhood friends to record video testimonials, affirming that I was truly a good person with no problems. Yet despite all this, still no one was willing to be my roommate. At the mere suggestion of me moving in, they would react with vehement refusal, saying they’d rather drop out. At this point, even the internet commenters couldn’t come up with any more explanations. Some even started to suspect I was hiding part of the story. The comment section went from actively trying to help solve the mystery to various taunts and mockery. “This has to be clickbait. OP must be selling something.” “Why only tell the parts that make you look good? How could everyone dislike you for no reason? You must be leaving something out.” “I’ll painlessly gain $100,000 the next time I see a post like this.” My inbox was also flooded with insults. Feeling utterly defeated, I deleted the post.
News of my situation quickly spread to other classes in the department. Not knowing the full story, some speculated I must have done something unforgivable, while others said I had some terrifying disease. Every time I walked through the department building, I felt like people were pointing and whispering about me. By this point, I had been staying at a hotel for over two weeks. The expensive hotel fees were draining my finances. With no other choice, I could only ask my parents for more living expenses. But watching a video of my parents crouched by a construction site eating plain steamed buns, I couldn’t bring myself to ask for money. After I was born, my parents decided not to have any more children, fearing I would face unfair treatment otherwise. Though we weren’t well-off, my parents always gave me the very best they could. Even though their education level was limited and they couldn’t help me with many things anymore, they still constantly encouraged and supported me. “River, are you getting used to living in the dorms? How’s it going with your roommates?” my mom asked on a video call. “I know you’re not very talkative, but try to get along well with your classmates.” “Making more friends will help you be happier.” “River, have you been eating properly? You look like you’ve lost weight after just a few weeks of school.” Hearing my mom’s concerned words and thinking of everything I had been through recently, I nearly burst into tears. I quickly ended the call. Even though I hadn’t asked for money, my mom still transferred some over, telling me to buy some good food. I knew I had to move into a dorm as soon as possible. I had given up hope of rooming in my own department, so I begged the RA to help me find an empty bed in another department’s dorm. Finally, after the RA’s tireless efforts, he managed to find me a spot. “This is a room for seniors in another department,” he explained. “They’re all out doing internships, so the room has been empty. There happens to be one spare bed available.” “We’ve talked to the RAs for both departments, and they’ve all agreed to let you move in.” Hearing this news, I wept with joy. Someone was finally willing to accept me. I wouldn’t have to stay in that expensive hotel anymore. In high spirits, I packed up my belongings and gave the room a thorough cleaning inside and out. I thought that if the senior roommates ever came back, I could at least leave them with a good impression. But I didn’t expect that day to come so soon. Before I could even enjoy two peaceful days of campus life, I learned that one of the senior roommates on an internship was coming back. The night before the senior was due to return, I tossed and turned anxiously, unable to sleep. The next day, I was a nervous wreck. I was terrified that as soon as the senior saw me, he would demand to have me kicked out again. But fortunately, all my worries were unfounded. The senior was very friendly, even sharing his snacks with me. Seeing how clean I had kept the room, he couldn’t stop praising me, saying he had lucked out with such an amazing junior roommate. I was overjoyed, feeling for the first time the warmth of friendship from a classmate on this campus. Things continued smoothly with my senior roommate. I felt like everything was finally back on track. Until that day when I had just finished class and was heading back with some takeout and watermelon. I had plans to play video games with my senior roommate that evening. But as soon as I reached our door, I found a crowd of people gathered outside. There was my senior roommate, the RAs from both departments, and two guys I didn’t recognize. From their tone, I gathered they must be the other two seniors who also lived in this room – my other two roommates. “No way. He has to move out,” one of them was saying firmly.
“We’re seniors now. Why should we have to room with a freshman?” “We can pay for that empty bed, or arrange for someone else to live there.” “Anyone but River.” I was stunned to see my senior roommate, who had been so friendly just that morning, now insisting on throwing me out. I was so shocked I couldn’t even keep hold of the watermelon in my hand. It fell to the ground and split open, red juice spreading across the floor like my seemingly bleeding heart. “But we were getting along so well just a few days ago,” I said desperately to my senior roommate. “Why do you suddenly want me to leave?” “Why does no one want to room with me? What did I do wrong?” I completely broke down, grabbing my roommate’s arm and practically begging him for an explanation. I was on the verge of kneeling down to plead with him. But no matter what I said, he just coldly demanded that I pack up and move out immediately. He threatened that if I refused to leave, he would make such a fuss that the entire dorm building wouldn’t be able to sleep. Even when the RA threatened to withhold his diploma, it didn’t sway him one bit. To avoid disturbing the other students, I had no choice but to silently pack my things and move out. The RA told me he truly couldn’t find any room willing to accept me anymore. He had already applied to the school to refund my dorm fees and suggested I find off-campus housing to rent. At this point, I had completely given up hope. With no other options, I found a part-time job at a bubble tea shop to cover rent. Fortunately, I quickly found a suitable apartment. With the refunded dorm fees to tide me over, I didn’t need to ask my parents for money. One day while working my shift at the bubble tea shop, I unexpectedly ran into Zack coming to buy a drink. We hadn’t spoken since that time I had begged him to be my roommate. But seeing me working as a cashier, he surprisingly came over to chat. “River, I still need to thank you, no matter what,” he said. “If it weren’t for you, I might have really fainted on campus that first day.” “Anyone who passed by probably would have helped. No need to thank me specifically,” I replied coldly, handing him his drink. The experiences of the past few weeks had left me utterly exhausted. I no longer wanted to engage with anyone from school more than necessary. “River, I…” Zack trailed off, his expression suddenly looking very guilty. It was a far cry from his arrogant refusal before. Seeing I wasn’t responding, he lingered by the shop entrance for a long time, seemingly wanting to say something but unable to get the words out. He finally left when other staff started urging him to move along. “What’s his deal? Does he owe you money or something? Why was he looking at you like that?” a coworker asked curiously after Zack left. I just shook my head. I was also confused why, ever since I had moved out and given up on living in the dorms, many classmates seemed to have become much friendlier towards me. They no longer avoided me in the hallways. Many even started inviting me to join their groups for class projects. Especially Zack. He seemed to constantly be looking for opportunities to repair our relationship, but would always stop short of actually saying anything when he got near me. I had no idea why things had changed. But since I couldn’t figure it out, I decided not to dwell on it. Living independently for four years would be fine. Once I graduated, I could leave all this unpleasantness behind. But just when I had come to terms with everything, it turned out someone else hadn’t.
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