My Sicilian crime boss boyfriend, Dante Volkov, and I had been together for ten years. I shielded him from blades ninety-nine times. On the hundredth time, he was finally moved. He decided to go straight and immigrate to the US to marry me. But on the day we were supposed to leave, he suddenly tore up the immigration papers. He wanted to stay with that woman who always timidly clung to his side, Willow. One of his men cautiously asked: “What about Sera?” “Didn’t you two agree to go to the US and start fresh, under new identities, after you went straight?” It was as if he’d just remembered, he slowly flicked ash from his cigarette, saying casually: “So what? Her life belongs to me.” “Without me, she would have been torn apart by rivals long ago. She’ll come around once she knows I’ve changed my mind. She’ll have no choice but to stay.” My nails dug deep into my palms, barely stopping myself from crying. That night, I destroyed all the secret codes and signals related to him, as if I had never known him. I didn’t stop my plans to immigrate. He didn’t know. I had walked through a decade of blood and chaos with him, But going straight, going overseas, was the only path I had chosen for myself to survive. He used to be my whole world, but now, I didn’t want him anymore.
One of his men saw me to the car, asking my destination several times, but I didn’t hear him. I remembered earlier, how I had excitedly gone to Dante, lunchbox in hand, ready to tell him our flight was booked. Instead, I overheard his conversation with Leo, his subordinate. “Are you really not going to the US, boss? What about Sera?” Dante glanced at him lazily. “Go subtly hint at it.” “What if Sera ignores me?” The tip of his cigarette glowed on and off; he flicked the ash impatiently. “A woman who constantly worries about my safety, who even personally makes me something as simple as porridge – how could she bear to miss your hint?” “A woman like Sera, I just have to beckon, and she’ll come running.” As he spoke, he couldn’t help but chuckle. Leo joked: “Boss, you’re amazing. You can even train a woman like Sera to be like a puppy. You should teach me your dating skills.” Dante crossed his long legs, his impatience growing. “A woman like Sera is too much drama. If you date someone like that, you’ll have hell to pay.” I looked at the two blisters on my hand from the scorching rice cooker and couldn’t help but laugh out loud. He rubbed the old-fashioned lighter in his hand, his expression somewhat strained. “Leo, Willow’s condition requires very specific care, resources for which aren’t easily found in the US. If I leave, she’ll be all alone. I can’t bear to abandon her.” In that instant, I felt like I’d fallen into an ice cavern. I turned off my phone, the flight information still on the screen, and walked away. It took me a while to find my voice again. “Take me home.” Volkov Enterprises’ towering headquarters sped past the car window, but my heart felt like it was still back there. In my mind, I made countless excuses for him: it was just a trick to fool his men, to keep our travel plans secret and avoid rivals. I locked myself in my room for four days straight. I blocked all of his men’s contacts, pretending nothing had happened. He hadn’t come home either. Until today, when Dante suddenly asked me to meet him at the cigar lounge where we first met. I thought, I had shielded him from the indiscriminate blades a hundred times; if he would just be honest, I would forgive him. After following him through life-and-death situations for ten years, I wasn’t ready to let go. The cigar lounge was filled with the scent of various tobaccos. When I realized something was wrong, a man in a black coat had been staring at me for a long time, the cold gleam of a blade flickering from his sleeve. It was only thanks to my hundred experiences with injury and a strong survival instinct that I managed to escape alive. When I staggered back to Dante’s office door, clutching my bleeding right arm, I saw my crime boss boyfriend sitting behind his desk, allowing Willow to playfully mess with him. He was smiling gently as she pulled at his meticulously tailored black suit. His long, well-defined fingers lovingly stroked Willow’s hair. Outside, blades flashed and blood stained the streets, but inside, it was peaceful and tender. The girl’s face was flushed with an unnatural color. “Dante, I’m scared. You gave up going to the US for me. Is it really worth it?” “If Sera finds out, will she hate me?” she whimpered, her voice shaky with worry. Unable to take it anymore, I twisted the doorknob, intending to storm in and confront him. Dante’s voice, nonchalant yet chillingly cruel, was colder than snow: “Sera? She’s just an accountant for my family. What difference does it make where she goes? She’ll still be crunching numbers.” “Willow, your health isn’t good. The US doesn’t have the specific resources for your treatment. How could I bear to leave you here alone?” I froze, my heart feeling as if a dagger had been plunged straight through it, a cold wind sweeping through my limbs, making me tremble with pain. Watching Dante bring the cigarette to Willow’s lips, a wave of nausea suddenly rose in my stomach.
I first met Dante at that cigar lounge. I’d once asked him for a cigarette. He flicked his expensive lighter, the flame dancing between his fingers. He gave me a nonchalant glance, pulled one from his pocket, and handed it to me. I held it, smiling as I leaned toward his fingers. “Lend me a light.” Watching the smoke curl from my lips, he chuckled, then took the cigarette from my mouth, took a drag himself. Through the haze of smoke, he asked, “What’s your name?” At the time, I was just a young accountant. I had no idea what price this impulsive attraction would demand, nor did I know that question would lead to a hundred scars on my body. Later, he considered sharing a cigarette to be a form of foreplay. When we were lost in those intimate moments, he’d hold me on his lap, kissing me deeply, nicotine acting as the perfect aphrodisiac. But that was actually my first time smoking. I hated tobacco, but because it was him, I was willing to endure it. Willow’s delicate cough pulled me back to reality. She was choking, her face flushed, coughing so hard she couldn’t stand straight. “Willow, how can you be my woman if you can’t even handle a little smoke?” Dante’s eyes were full of tenderness and amusement, completely devoid of any coldness or anger. What was this? What I saw as unique and irreplaceable, Dante offered casually to anyone. What I painstakingly strove for and couldn’t attain, Willow received effortlessly. Watching Willow’s playful, pouting antics, I suddenly felt that this never-equal relationship could finally end. On my way home, I received a call from the airline. “Mr. Volkov’s flight information hasn’t been confirmed yet. Ms. Sera, do you plan to board alone?” I didn’t hesitate. “Yes.” Dante and his men all believed that I had been with him through thick and thin for ten years, loved him for ten years, and could never leave him. But they didn’t know that going straight and moving to the US wasn’t just about starting over with him. I had two other, non-negotiable reasons to go. Since he had already made his choice, embarking on a different path from me, why should I insist on walking with him? That night, a strong pair of arms pulled me into a hard, warm embrace. “Sera, I had a document to sign this evening. You… you didn’t wait too long, did you?” Seeing I didn’t speak, he sighed, lifting his hand to trace my lips. “Baby, I knew you wouldn’t have the patience to wait for me.” “The first time I saw you, I knew you weren’t the easy-going type, you were impulsive.” He leaned closer, his unique scent filling my nostrils. I couldn’t take it anymore and pushed him away. “Were you there? How do you know I didn’t wait?” I turned on the light, revealing the still-bleeding scar on my arm. “Dante, this is the 101st scar I’ve gotten because of you.” He glanced at it, the tenderness in his eyes fading as he explained, exasperated: “I received intel, and I was actually planning to come find you, but Willow arrived. I couldn’t let them know about Willow’s existence; her body is weak, she couldn’t handle an assassination attempt.” “So I *could* handle it, is that what you’re saying?” That man today was clearly well-prepared. Your movements were leaked, and to protect the pure happiness of the girl you loved, I was the one who paid the price. “Do you have any idea, if Leo hadn’t arrived today, I would have lost an arm there!” He froze, clearly not expecting me to lash out at him. His voice turned cold. “Sera, that’s enough.” “You’ve already shielded me from a hundred assassination attempts, and you’re perfectly fine, aren’t you?” His shamelessness left me speechless.
Dante once said that Willow was like a pristine jasmine in the mountains, different from people like us who live by the blade. As the Volkov family’s accountant, I knew too many things that couldn’t be discussed openly. Constantly by Dante’s side, dangers were countless, and injuries were commonplace. I shielded Dante from blades, and gradually, I shielded Willow from blades too. My scars healed, only to be replaced by new ones. The longest scar stretched from my waist to my shoulder. Dante was finally moved by me and promised to get engaged. “As a Sicilian crime boss, I am absolutely loyal to my family and my woman. Willow isn’t a threat to you. Why are you being so dramatic?” “Dante, do we even *have* a family?” He frowned in annoyance. “Sera, isn’t our engagement party next month? What are you playing at?” He seemed to have forgotten that the prerequisite for our engagement was him going straight and moving to the US with me. “Me playing? Dante, you must have forgotten…” The phone rang abruptly, a sweet female voice coming from the receiver. “Big Brother Dante, I can’t sleep.” Dante slowly lifted his eyes to look at me, then gently coaxed her. I scoffed and got out of bed. But he hung up the phone and grabbed my arm. “Where are you going?” I shook his hand off. “Can you even keep track?” His face darkened further, his cold eyes sweeping over me. “Don’t forget the family gathering tomorrow night.” The sprawling Volkov family’s annual gathering. In previous years, I had always been by his side. Unwilling to stay with him, I turned and went into the guest room, locking the door. At the greedy, power-hungry event, Dante was an hour late. Leaving me alone to face the predatory Volkov family elders. After following Dante for ten years, no matter how outstanding my abilities, I was never truly accepted by them. Instead, because I held so many of Volkov Enterprises’ secret ledgers, I was viewed with deep suspicion. Under the spotlight, Dante held Willow’s hand. Her white dress was blindingly bright. Among a sea of somber black, Willow was the only clear, bright jasmine. Looking at my own dull black evening gown, I remembered Dante’s words. “Sera, don’t wear white anymore.” Only later did I understand: white made blood visible, and only black, which disguised wounds, would make him feel safe letting me shield him from blades. Willow saw me, first freezing slightly, then nervously hiding behind Dante. “Sister Sera, please don’t misunderstand. Big Brother Dante just felt sorry that I haven’t seen much of the world, so he brought me. I didn’t mean to be an eyesore.” I couldn’t help but scoff softly. “If you know you’re an eyesore, then stay out of my sight.” Willow immediately cowered behind Dante, tears welling in her eyes. “Big Brother Dante, I knew Sister Sera would mind. Maybe I should just leave?” She said she would leave, but her legs made no move. Dante gave me a cold glance, his brows furrowed with impatience. “My family is not yours to control.” He sat down with Willow in front of all the elders, completely disregarding my situation. Numerous suspicious and malicious gazes turned to me. My heart grew cold, and I stood up with my bag to leave. As I passed Willow, she suddenly “slipped,” and a cup of scalding hot water crashed to the floor. In an instant, shards of glass mixed with hot water splashed onto my ankle. Willow frantically crouched down, anxiously reaching out to touch my ankle. “Sister Sera, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” Sharp pain shot through me. “Get lost.” I lifted my foot, intending to walk away, but before I could even touch her, she shrieked and fell to the floor. Dante immediately grabbed my wrist, his voice burning with anger. “Sera! Haven’t you caused enough trouble?!” Trouble? I looked at him, deeply disappointed. This act was so clumsy; I couldn’t believe he, who constantly navigated the murky waters of both legal and illegal worlds, couldn’t see through it. “Apologize or kneel, choose one.” I was incredulous. I forcefully yanked my arm away. “What if I choose neither?” Before Dante could speak, an elder behind him immediately chimed in, “Sera, you’ve been with Dante for so many years, don’t you understand the rules? When you’re wrong, you apologize.” “Are we supposed to beg you?” I looked at Dante, foolishly still hoping he would say a few words in my defense. I had been with him for ten years, risked my life dozens of times, yet I couldn’t earn a single good word from him within his family. Willow had only been here for a year, and with a few drops of her tears, I was being criticized and insulted by everyone. Why?
I turned and strode out of the banquet. My heart felt like it was being fiercely squeezed, a sharp pain radiating through me. I shamefully recalled the first time Dante had publicly rebuked me for Willow. Dante’s office had a resting room specifically for me, filled with our personal belongings. One afternoon, I went to rest and found him fresh out of the shower, toweling his damp hair. And Willow emerged from the bedroom, wearing my sexy silk negligee. That negligee was Dante’s favorite. Anger surged through me, and I lashed out at her. Dante watched me with a faint smile, not offering a single explanation, shielding Willow behind him. “Sister Sera, I spilled coffee on my clothes, and Big Brother Dante brought me here to change. Nothing happened between us…” I slapped Willow, then looked at Dante. “Aren’t you going to explain?” His expression turned cold. He looked at Willow, who was crying and running out, then roughly grabbed my arm and dragged me out. He made me apologize to Willow in front of everyone. Because of this, the authority I had painstakingly built up within the family was completely ruined, turning me into a joke among his men. Afterward, when he finally explained, it was just a light, dismissive remark: “Willow is sensitive. If you don’t apologize, how will she be able to stay by my side?” “And nothing really happened between us.” I dared not dig deeper into whether nothing had happened or if nothing *had time* to happen. I was too deeply immersed in the illusion of tenderness he could create. Now, looking back, perhaps it was just my own stubborn refusal to give up. Unwilling to admit my failure; my career and love life all became a joke because of Willow. When I got home, before I could even turn on the light, I saw the glowing tip of a cigarette in the darkness on the sofa. I frowned, my first act was to open a window for ventilation. I used to find him incredibly captivating when he smoked; now, the scent made me sick. I tried to ignore him. But he pulled me into his arms, and I clumsily landed on his lap, forced to face him. “Sera, can you stop making a scene about Willow in public? She’s just a clumsy young woman, not a threat to you.” I looked at him flatly. “No, I can’t.” He stared at me, his face darker. “My men manage all aspects of the family’s operations, legal and illegal. Your endless drama just makes me feel exhausted, you know that?” I said seriously, “If you’re tired, then let’s end it.” I had loved him genuinely; even now, confronting him defiantly, I still found his features handsome and sharp, just as they were when I first met him. And my love for him was genuinely gone. Once enough disappointment accumulated, my heart no longer stirred for him. After a long pause, he avoided my gaze, pulled out his lighter, and fretfully rubbed it back and forth. “Sera, let’s both calm down.” I got up and walked into the bedroom, hearing the click of his lighter and the igniting of tobacco behind me. Dante said, “What Leo, my man, told you, think about it carefully. Don’t… wander off aimlessly these days.” I scoffed internally. He thought I’d understood his hint, that I’d seen he tore up the papers and would inevitably compromise and stay, just as I had countless times before. Leo had hinted, but did I *have* to understand? That day, I had managed to hack into the family’s network and discovered a chilling piece of information—a hit order from the Volkov family elders against me. They believed I might betray them at any moment and wanted to eliminate me quickly. Dante had suppressed this hit order, which meant he clearly knew that if I stayed, I would be facing hell. Yet, he still tore up the papers. For Willow, he disregarded my safety. Perhaps this relationship was never worth it. No matter how unwilling I was to let go, it was time to move on completely. After packing my bags, the suitcase was light. I only took simple clothes and documents, leaving everything else behind. This included all the limited-edition bags and jewelry Dante had given me over the years, which I had no intention of taking. Just as I was about to head to the airport, I realized I was missing one crucial item.
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