In our Antarctic research team, there was this running joke – the ‘Perpetually Single’ hall of fame. My name was etched onto it year after year. That was because for eight years of marriage, my wife never once shared a bed with me, and yet, I stubbornly refused to divorce her. She hated me, called me a coward and a monster, claiming I’d selfishly ruined her beloved childhood sweetheart’s life. I hated her blindness, her utter inability to see. I swore I’d entangle myself with her for life, ensuring that even in death, her tombstone would only bear my name. But then the glacier collapsed. She pushed me away, buried alive by the ice and snow. “Asher, if there’s a next life,” she gasped, her voice barely a whisper, “please… I’m begging you… don’t ever love me again.” By the time they rescued her, she had already suffocated. Not long after, I died during a new expedition. When I opened my eyes again, I chose to voluntarily give up the engagement. “This research mission? I’ll go.” “Wasn’t your engagement to Valentina something you fought tooth and nail for? Are you really willing to give it up and go to Antarctica in Damian’s place?” My mother, Dean Eleanor Thorne, scrutinized me with an icy stare. Everyone at the institute knew that Damian and I were brothers only in name – no blood, and certainly no affection. To abandon Valentina and suffer for Damian beneath the Antarctic ice? Impossible! “Seven more days, and you’ll finally be Valentina’s husband. And now you want to give up?” I parted my tightly pressed lips, cutting off my mother’s probing questions. “Haven’t you always said that because I was born three minutes before Damian, an older brother should always give way to his younger brother?” Ever since I returned to the Thorne family, my mother’s biggest worry wasn’t about my suffering while I was adrift, but whether Damian would be upset by a ‘stranger’ suddenly appearing in our home. In my previous life, if I hadn’t reminded her of my father’s dying wish, she would have immediately arranged for me to take Damian’s spot. Seeing my insistence, Mom sighed in relief. She submitted my name to the Antarctic research team and notified the Valentine family about the change in the arranged engagement. As I stepped out of the Dean’s office, Valentina walked right into me. Last time, she’d volunteered to go in Damian’s place. When Mom shut her down, she went on a hunger strike. I used every trick in the book to get her to eat. I even had the institute’s doctors give her IV drips, practically binding her to complete the wedding. Now, I walked past her, my gaze fixed straight ahead, but Valentina grabbed me. “The Antarctic mission is critical, an urgent directive from high command,” I said coldly. Valentina clenched her fists. “You know it’s a death trap! There must be another way!” I chuckled. Every nation was scrambling to find a way to genetically advance humanity. If we didn’t act, our country would fall behind! One of us, either Damian or I, had to shoulder the responsibility of venturing deep into the Antarctic storm zone, even if it was a one-way ticket. “The higher-ups have instructed the Dean to lead by example, sending her own flesh and blood to Antarctica. No one can stop it.” She fixed her eyes on me. “Then why isn’t it you?” Hearing her unthinking question, my pupils dilated slightly, instantly pulling back the urge to tell her the truth. “Think whatever you want.” “Perhaps the outcome you desired has already been achieved.” I ignored her gaze and walked away. I had intended to tell Valentina about the name change on the list, but I decided against it. Let it be my own selfishness; I didn’t want to see her calm, indifferent face when she learned I was the one going to my death. In my previous life, at the moment the glacier collapsed, Valentina pushed me onto the only life raft, getting buried alive by the heavy ice and snow herself. I thought if I just kept giving, I could eventually warm her heart. She gave her life to save me, on the same glacier that claimed Damian’s life, asking me in her dying breath not to love her in the next life. So be it. This time, my trip to Antarctica would be my way of repaying her for saving my life.
Back in my dorm, I began searching for information on the Antarctic storm zone. It was a place of perpetual, violent storms, incredibly dangerous. In my previous life, Damian spent six months locating the fossil. Immediately after transmitting the findings, he was caught in a storm, his body torn apart. Later, when the research project resumed, Valentina was buried alive by a glacier, triggered by a storm, while saving me… I meticulously recalled the storm phenomena I’d observed in my previous life, trying to find a pattern. After a sleepless night with no breakthroughs, I headed to the cafeteria to grab a bite. The moment I sat down, a tray of soup and water sloshed all over me. Valentina grabbed my collar, the scalpel she used for dissecting rodents pressed against my wide, startled eyes. “Asher Thorne!” I tried to push her away, but she shoved me harder, slamming me back against the chair. “Are you insane?!” I twisted her hand, turning the blade away, but she lunged, stabbing. “You know going to the storm zone is a death trap, and you still sent a message congratulating Damian? How utterly disgusting are you?” “Just to make me marry you! Have you no self-respect left?!” The spot on my back, where I dodged the blade, felt like it had been struck by lightning. The cold, desolate days and nights of my previous life flashed before my eyes, merging with the hatred in hers. Snapping back to reality, I instantly raised my hand, elbowing her restraining arm. The scalpel clattered to the floor. “Researcher Valentina, are you going to use your life-saving scalpel to kill me?” She froze, “Are you alright? I just, I just…” I picked up the scalpel, tossed it onto the table, and cut her off. “No matter how dangerous the storm zone is, someone has to go. Will it be less dangerous if I go?” “Perhaps this wedding isn’t as bad as you think. Maybe it’s something worth celebrating.” Valentina was speechless. “Watching Damian die and marrying you? What’s there to celebrate about any of that?” My limbs felt on the verge of losing control. I clenched my fists and turned to leave. Valentina, this time, everything will be worth celebrating. Deleting the approval notification, I watched Valentina still determinedly heading towards the Dean’s office. I returned with my storm zone research materials, only to bump into Valentina. She was carefully unfolding an amulet and using a fine brush to dust it off. Damian saw me and asked, “What’s that? Is it for me?” Valentina didn’t even look up. “It’s nothing valuable. I’ll get you something better later.” My转身 (turning away) startled Valentina. In her hand was… the amulet my father had sought from a master after I was admitted to the National Institute of Advanced Sciences. He said he was just a businessman, couldn’t help me with my academic path, and didn’t care how far I went academically, only that I stayed safe. Later, Valentina burned herself with reagents in a lab experiment, and I gave it to her. Despite Valentina’s calls, I didn’t look back. Late that night, still unable to sleep, I went out for some air. The amulet, hanging on the doorknob, dropped to my feet. I gave a cold laugh. I glanced at it once, then slammed the door shut. When the drizzling rain began, I stood by the door for a long time before picking up the amulet again.
At the farewell party, Damian held his glass, listening to the compliments and resentments of his colleagues. “Asher Thorne is such a calculator, isn’t he? When it’s a matter of life or death, he pretends not to be the Dean’s son, but when it’s about stealing someone’s girl, he suddenly remembers his Thorne name! He’s nothing but a coward!” “His own brother is practically going to die, and he’s still trying to steal his woman. What’s the difference between him and an animal?!” The electronic screen at the venue only announced a farewell for “Dean Thorne’s son heading to Antarctica,” without specifying a name. The man who was speaking hadn’t expected me to appear. He froze for a few seconds, then defiantly stuck out his neck. “What are you looking at? Damian is just better than you, brother. I heard you grew up in the countryside, right? No wonder you’re such a turtle, hiding your head!” Someone else chimed in: “Exactly! They say a tiger doesn’t sire a dog, but his mother’s son won’t even go to Antarctica! It’s a disgrace to Dean Thorne and Mr. Thorne’s genes!” Damian strode forward, calling me over at the entrance to the hall. “Mom said you volunteered to go to Antarctica to die. You’re pretty sensible, you know? Valentina loves me so much, if I die in Antarctica, won’t she be heartbroken and mourn for me forever?” “I’m so generous, giving you the chance to make history at the institute, but if colleagues think otherwise, there’s nothing I can do…” “I guess I’ll just burn more offerings for you when you die, as a thank you for looking after my wife all these years~” I gave a sarcastic smile, looking at him meaningfully. “You going there would definitely be a death sentence. But why would it be for me?” “You barely scraped by with those ‘graduate’ degrees, thinking you’re better than me, the specially recruited top student from the National Institute of Advanced Sciences? Mom pulled strings for you behind the scenes, and you actually believe your scores caught up to mine?” Before I could finish, he suddenly stumbled backward dramatically, feigning alarm. “Brother, even if I shouldn’t be so close to Valentina, you shouldn’t…” Just by the sound of footsteps, I knew it was Valentina. I was about to turn. A fiery slap landed on my face. Before I could recover, another hit the other cheek. Valentina shielded Damian like a mother hen protecting her chick, the fury in her eyes almost solid. “I truly underestimated you!” “Damian is going to Antarctica for everyone’s sake! Are you trying to get him killed by targeting him at this crucial moment?!” I shook my head. “There are cameras here, you…” “Shut up!” Valentina raised her voice, her gaze like daggers. “You’ve always been timid, avoiding the Antarctic expedition. That’s one thing. But your brother is going to such a dangerous place in your stead, and not only do you show no gratitude, you try to harm him!” “You ungrateful wretch, I should’ve just let those kids beat you to death back then! You’re a stain on Father’s legacy!” My body stiffened, and I struggled to regulate my breathing. I couldn’t hear anything, only saw her lips moving. My thoughts were interrupted by a sharp tug on the cord around my neck. I lifted my bloodshot eyes, staring intently at the amulet Valentina was shoving into Damian’s hand. “What are you doing?!” Damian whimpered, “Anyway, I’m going to Antarctica. Can’t you just let me have this, big brother? I just want Dad’s blessing and protection…” My eyes never left Valentina’s expression. “Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten what this amulet means to me!” Valentina’s face paled. Seeing Damian’s wounded expression, she stepped forward and grabbed my arm. “Damian is leaving for Antarctica soon, this is for national interest, don’t be so petty!” “You’re both Mr. Thorne’s sons, he wouldn’t mind if I used it to bless Damian…” “After the wedding, I’ll buy you ten, a hundred amulets to make it up to you, okay?” I shook off Valentina’s hand and reached for Damian. With a sharp rip, the amulet tore in half. Damian murmured, “I didn’t mean it!”, but his eyes, facing me, gleamed with triumph. I was about to throw a punch. Valentina pulled out her scalpel, pointing the tip at my forehead. This was the second time she’d aimed a lab scalpel at me. “Didn’t you hear Damian say it was an accident?” “Do you believe I’ll report you for insulting a national hero?!” I gave a bitter laugh, pulled a vial of corrosive reagent from my uniform pocket, and rattled it, showing her the serial number. Watching her panicked expression, I thought of our previous life, how we were glaring at each other, hating each other’s guts, practically wishing the other dead. Through my blurring vision, I thought I saw her final look when she pushed me. I reached out, trying to grasp the hand hanging beneath the ice and snow – *Pffft!* My tear-blurred eyes fixated on the spreading red. Valentina let go, staring blankly at the scalpel plunged into my chest. Just like every confrontation in my past life, she always went for the kill, while I always pulled my punches. Valentina’s gaze swept over the reagent vial rolling on the ground. She broke down. “Asher! Don’t you hate me?” “Why did you stop?! Weren’t you trying to die with me?!” Hearing those familiar words, I pressed my hand to my chest, supporting myself as I stumbled towards the door. But I couldn’t stand steadily, and fell into an embrace filled with a heavy lychee scent. The cold wetness dripping onto my neck only made me feel colder.
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