1 I shoved Ruby to grab my toy, and Mother hurled an adoption certificate at me. Seeing the girl who looked so much like me, I let go of my bear. From then on, I surrendered anything Ruby wanted. When she wondered what being top felt like, I tutored her nightly and deliberately turned in blank tests. Teachers and classmates sneered, convinced I’d cheated. Brother Mason disowned me publicly. Only Noah stayed, my sole comfort. On college results day, I clutched my 1600 SAT score and Columbia acceptance, eager to share our Ivy League future. Instead, I found Noah comforting Ruby after her failed finals. “I’ll follow you to community college,” he told her. Ruby hesitated, worried about me. Noah ruffled her hair. “You were adopted. Sadie had her real family. You need looking after.” Mason joined in. “Sadie has a real family. You only have us.” I bit my lip until I tasted blood, swallowing sobs. I’d endured years of injustice to compensate for her adoption, only to find all their love belonged to her. That night, I deleted Columbia from my portal and chose Stanford, thousands of miles away. If they’d discarded me, I’d chase my own stars. … I didn’t snap out of my daze until Noah walked right up to me. “When did you get here? Why are you crying?” His voice was just as gentle as it had always been. If I hadn’t noticed his pinky finger still tangled in a strand of Ruby’s newly dyed pink hair, I would have thought my eyes were playing tricks on me earlier. I wiped the wetness from my cheeks and threw together a quick lie. “It’s nothing. The wind blew some dirt into my eyes.” Noah gave me a knowing, almost pitying look. “You bombed your exams and you’re too embarrassed to admit it.” “Right?” Before I could even formulate a response, his voice spiked with excitement. “But it’s totally fine. I changed my enrollment.” “We can still stay together!” I stared at the screen of his phone. It displayed his stellar test scores right next to the acceptance portal for Crestview Community College. My eyes widened in pure disbelief. Up until this very second, I thought he had just been saying things to make Ruby feel better. I never imagined he would actually throw away his spot at a top tier university for a local community college. He had been dreaming of the Ivy League since we were in elementary school. Was throwing away his entire future just to babysit Ruby really worth it? Seeing my stunned silence, Noah waved a hand in front of my face. “Speechless? Are you crying because you’re so touched?” “I told you a long time ago. Even if the whole world abandons you, I will never leave your side!” Looking into his bright, earnest eyes, I was suddenly pulled back to a summer ten years ago. An eight year old boy had walked me home. He sat at my kitchen table for hours, meticulously taping together the shredded pieces of my homework that Ruby had “accidentally” ripped up. With his eyes red from exhaustion, he had used that exact same tone to say those exact same words to me. Hearing what used to be the most beautiful promise in the world now just made me feel violently sick. I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing down the bitter lump in my throat. “I’m not feeling great. I’m going home.” “Go rest. Text me when you get back.” He reached out to cup my cheek, a gesture he had done a thousand times before. I turned my head, letting his hand hit empty air. Noah’s hand froze halfway. He opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, but his phone buzzed. Ruby’s sickly sweet, whining voice drifted through the speaker. “Noah! Don’t forget you promised to take me back to school shopping this afternoon!” The corners of Noah’s mouth instantly turned up. His voice softened into pure honey. “I know, I know. When have I ever broken a promise to you?” By the time he put his phone away and looked up, I was already gone. Hidden in the shadows of an alleyway, I buried my face in my knees and let the tears fall freely. The boy I thought would never betray me had finally discarded me too. In my world, there was no one left but me. When I unlocked the front door of my house, my parents and Mason were taking turns trying to make Ruby laugh. The three of them looked so incredibly patient and dedicated. You would think they were trying to soothe a fragile toddler, not an eighteen year old adult. The moment Mason saw me walk in, a malicious glint flashed in his eyes. Before I could even process what was happening, a bucket of freezing water laced with chili powder was dumped directly over my head. I gasped, choking violently. The dual shock of the ice and the burning spice sent me into a coughing fit. Tears and mucus streamed down my face as my eyes caught fire. Ruby burst into hysterical laughter, pointing at my pathetic, dripping figure. “Thank God, she’s finally smiling!” My parents immediately relaxed. They looked like they were about to cry tears of joy just because Ruby was amused. This exact scenario had played out countless times over the years. If I scored a few points higher than her on a math test, or if a classmate complimented my outfit, or even if I just walked a little faster than her on the way home, it would trigger a massive emotional breakdown for Ruby. The second she shed a single tear, my parents would lose their minds and take their anger out on whoever was nearby. Originally, Mason used to get caught in the crossfire just like me. Because we shared the same misery, my brother and I used to be incredibly close. We survived the madness together. That was until one specific night when our parents were punishing both of us. Out of nowhere, Ruby spoke up to defend him. “Don’t yell at Mason. He bought me a candy bar yesterday.” My parents stopped mid rant. They immediately turned all their fury entirely onto me. That night, I laid in bed covered in bruises. Mason stood outside my bedroom door apologizing for hours, but I didn’t say a word. I didn’t blame him for saving his own skin. But that candy bar she mentioned. I had saved my allowance for weeks to buy it, and I had specifically given it to him. After that night, Mason crossed over to Ruby’s side. They shared candy, and they shared the hobby of bullying me. Then, I met Noah. Under his constant protection and comfort, the wounds from my brother’s betrayal slowly scabbed over. My dark, suffocating life finally had a sliver of light. But in the end, all that light was redirected to shine exclusively on Ruby. She stole my life, and then she stole every single person who ever cared about me. Right now, Ruby’s eyes were dancing with smug satisfaction, but she put on a mask of exaggerated innocence. “Oh no, Sadie, you’re coughing so hard you’re bleeding! And your clothes are soaked.” “Here, use a towel!” I stared at her. I didn’t take the towel. I lunged forward, grabbed a fistful of her freshly dyed hair, and violently shoved her face directly into the remaining chili water pooled in the bottom of the bucket on the floor. She thrashed wildly, screaming and sobbing. “Mom! Dad! Mason, get her off me!” I watched her panic. Her gorgeous pink hair was a matted mess, her pristine white dress soaked in dirty, spicy water. A twisted, thrilling sense of revenge bloomed in my chest. I threw my head back and started laughing. Mason rushed forward, shoving me backward with brutal force. My dad’s face was purple with rage. He raised his hand and slapped me across the cheek so hard the room spun. The impact snapped my head to the side. The heavy, metallic taste of blood flooded my mouth. I clutched my stinging cheek, and my laughter only grew louder. My mom pulled a sobbing Ruby into her arms, glaring at me with absolute, unfiltered hatred. “Sadie, if you act like a psycho one more time, I will send you away for good!” The first time I heard her say those words, I was four years old. I had been aggressively trying to take back a teddy bear my grandmother had given me from Ruby’s hands. The second my mom threatened to send me away, I went limp and let go of the toy. In that moment, my tiny brain pictured the stray dogs shivering in the rain, the homeless men sleeping in the dirt under the highway overpass. For weeks afterward, I woke up screaming from nightmares. I used to run to my parents’ bedroom, crying and begging. “I promise I’ll never fight with my sister again, please just don’t send me away!” I had been so utterly consumed by the terror of abandonment that I completely missed the fleeting looks of triumph and relief passing between my parents. But today was different. I slowly stood up straight and looked my mother dead in the eyes. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the adoption certificate. I tossed it onto the coffee table right in front of them. My voice was ice cold, dripping with venom. “Go ahead. Kick your biological daughter out.” “That way I won’t get in the way of you loving someone else’s kid.” The living room plunged into a suffocating, dead silence. “What… what kind of nonsense are you talking about?” My mom, usually so loud and overbearing, suddenly sounded like a cornered mouse. The guilt was practically radiating off her. I didn’t blink. I kept my eyes locked on hers. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.” On my way home, I had stared at that certificate for hours. I finally noticed the discrepancies. The name on the paper had been visibly tampered with. The dates didn’t line up at all. According to the date of adoption, I would have been four and a half years old. But the little girl in the photo was three at the most. And then I looked closely at the picture. At a quick glance, her features looked like mine. But zooming in, the girl in the photo had monolid eyes. I have double eyelids. My mom, my dad, and Mason all have double eyelids. Every single piece of evidence pointed to one undeniable fact. Ruby was the adopted child, not me. Feeling the weight of my stare, my mom finally cracked. She let out a cold, defensive scoff. “So what if we lied to you?” “If you weren’t such a selfish, aggressive brat, we wouldn’t have had to use that tactic to control you!” She pulled Ruby tighter against her chest, looking at me like I was garbage. “And even with that hanging over your head, you still bully her relentlessly.” “I have no idea how I gave birth to such a vicious, toxic monster!” She looked deeply, genuinely pained, as if being my mother was the greatest tragedy of her life. My dad and Mason pointed their fingers at me, their faces twisted in anger. “Apologize to Ruby right now, or you are dead to us!” Watching the three of them form a united front against me drove the final nail into my heart. I was their actual flesh and blood. But in their minds, there was only room for Ruby. There wasn’t a single square inch of space left for me. The absolute last shred of hope I held for this family evaporated into thin air. “You don’t need to kick me out. I’m leaving.” I walked to my room, dragged my dusty suitcase out from under the bed, and tossed my few meager belongings inside. I zipped it shut and walked out the front door without looking back. Behind me, the sound of their cursing carried through the humid summer air. “This is completely out of control! Does she actually think she can survive out there?” “I knew she was rotten to the core! We never should have kept her.” Then, their voices shifted, melting into sweet reassurance. “It’s okay, we still have our perfect little angel Ruby. God blessed us in the end.” In the past, hearing those words would have sent me spiraling into a guilt trip, crawling back to beg for forgiveness. Now, I felt nothing but a euphoric, weightless sense of relief. I was finally escaping hell. Since they loved Ruby so much, they could keep her. I was out. I dragged my suitcase to the boba shop where I worked part time and set up a makeshift bed in the supply closet. Even though it was literally a closet filled with syrup bottles, it was my own private space. Years ago, just because Ruby casually mentioned she wanted a dedicated music room, my bedroom was gutted and I was permanently moved to the enclosed sunporch. I lived out there for fourteen years. I baked in the summer, froze in the winter, and had absolutely zero privacy. On my second day living at the shop, a familiar figure walked through the glass doors. Noah stood there holding a bouquet of sunflowers, my absolute favorite. He looked wrecked. “I shouldn’t have kept it a secret from you.” “I am so sorry. I messed up.” I didn’t reach for the flowers. I just stared at him and asked one question. “When exactly did your feelings for her change?” I remembered the very first time Ruby showed her true, vicious colors. Noah had been so furious he almost screamed at her. He had looked at me and said, “Sadie, even if you aren’t really their blood, you are worth ten thousand times more than she will ever be.” The girl he once thought was a manipulative brat was now the center of his entire universe. Noah seemed to know exactly what moment I was thinking of. “Do you remember that massive hurricane at the start of eighth grade?” Of course I remembered. It was the worst flooding our city had seen in a century. The night before the storm hit, I had taken heavy cold medicine and passed out. When I woke up, there was two feet of water in my bedroom. My entire family was gone. They had evacuated without waking me. Panicking, I grabbed my phone and dialed my emergency contact. Noah. Thank God the cell towers were still working. But the phone rang and rang and rang. He never picked up. In utter despair, clutching the small potted cactus he had given me for my birthday, I climbed out my window and scrambled onto the roof. After I was finally rescued by a patrol boat, Noah found me. He told me he dropped his phone in the water and got lost trying to navigate the flooded streets to reach my house. I believed him. I even felt relieved he hadn’t made it. If the rescue boat had been one minute later, the current would have swept me away. I preferred him being safe over him risking his life for me. But right now, standing in the boba shop, he finally told the truth. “Ruby lost her favorite stuffed animal during the evacuation. She was having a total panic attack, crying uncontrollably.” “I couldn’t stand seeing her so devastated. So I decided to help her find the doll before I came to get you.” Noah raised his hand as if taking an oath, his eyes wide and innocent. “I never meant to abandon you. I swear.” A sickening wave of bitterness washed over me. When it was life or death, Ruby’s plush toy took priority over my actual life. He did keep his promise to protect someone. He just changed the person. I asked my second question. “Why?” Why did he know the truth about the adoption but choose to keep me in the dark? Why did he give all his sympathy to the girl who stole my life, leaving me with nothing? Noah hesitated for a second before answering. “Because you’re strong.” “Ruby is different. She acts tough, but inside she is incredibly fragile and sensitive.” “Compared to you, she needs me so much more.” The words felt like a knife twisting in my ribs. Compared to Ruby, who had mastered the art of playing the victim, I was absolutely tougher. But I was only tough because I learned early on that if I fell, no one was going to catch me. I thought he was the one person I could lean on. Instead, he pushed me off the ledge. I tilted my head back, swallowing the pain. “Leave.” “Let’s just pretend we never met.” Noah was clearly shocked by how cold and unyielding I was being. He planted his feet in the doorway, refusing to move. “Sadie, are you seriously going to be this heartless?” I grabbed the bouquet of sunflowers and tossed them straight into the trash can. “You let go of me first. Not the other way around.” Without hesitating, I pulled the heavy metal security gate down, slamming it shut between us. Through the metal slats, Noah’s frustrated, angry voice echoed on the pavement. “Sadie, with an attitude this toxic, no one is ever going to love you!” That’s fine. I will love myself. I whispered the words in my head. For the next few weeks, I worked double shifts. Right before the semester started, I finally saved up enough to cover my first semester’s tuition. It was my ticket out of this miserable swamp. Three days before orientation, I bought a plane ticket to California. Sitting in the terminal, my phone buzzed. A text from Noah. [Sadie, stop throwing a tantrum. I know you enrolled at Crestview too.] [When classes start, we can still be best friends. We can look out for Ruby together!] Immediately after, texts from my parents and Mason came through. [We are hosting a huge graduation dinner for Ruby at the Ritz tomorrow. You need to show up.] [We know you have terrible character and your grades are garbage, but we’ve accepted it. After all, we share the same blood.] I stared at the messages for two seconds. Then, I hit delete. I blocked every single one of their numbers. I grabbed my carry-on and walked toward the boarding gate without a single glance backward. The pathetic, desperate girl who begged for crumbs of love died in that house. I didn’t need anyone’s pity ever again. From now on, I was flying high, and I was never looking back.
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