The first time my boyfriend and I got intimate, he actually *complained* that my sounds weren’t sexy enough. Then he had the audacity to suggest playing a recording from his phone. The sounds from his phone were undeniably arousing, so much so that even I felt a strange thrill. But a crushing wave of insecurity hit me instantly. I looked at his eager eyes and his burning body, silent for two agonizing seconds. I loved him. I didn’t want to ruin the mood, so I swallowed my pride and reluctantly agreed. But that night, I didn’t feel anything good. Not even a spark. From then on, I secretly practiced making sultrier moans when he wasn’t around. I’d even find myself laughing at how ridiculous it felt. One day, I snuck his phone, wanting to transfer that recording to mine so I could practice along. But when I saw the note for the recording, my heart skipped a frantic beat. [Chloe’s Little Siren] Chloe. The same Chloe who had made my life hell in college. And the same Chloe he’d chased for four years and never got. That very night, he was playing that recording on repeat in the bathroom. When he came out, he was already throbbing with desire. He grabbed me, pulled me into the bedroom, and covered my face with a new lace mask. The moans from his phone were still echoing on loop. He frantically started tearing at my clothes, muttering, “I can’t take it anymore. Put this on properly, so I don’t accidentally knock it off when things get wild.” As his words sank in, my heart felt like it had been violently stomped on. A suffocating feeling choked me. Liam, what do I even mean to you?
Tears streamed down my face, hot and scalding, a stark contrast to my icy heart. I could hear my tears wetting the sheets, and a bitter ache twisted in my chest. After he’d stripped me naked, he turned up the volume of *her* moans. “I’m just doing this to enhance the experience. You get that, right?” My heart was shattered beyond words. I couldn’t answer him. The mask hid my despair, but the excitement on his face was impossible to hide. Seeing my lack of reaction, a flicker of annoyance crossed his handsome features. “Just this once, okay? This sound is so… stimulating. I really can’t help myself…” I had loved him for seven years, chased him relentlessly for four. I really didn’t want to throw it all away over this. But I couldn’t stand him trampling on my dignity either. I bit down hard on my inner cheek, the metallic taste of blood instantly filling my mouth. “Either turn off that recording, or you can take care of yourself.” “Are you serious, Anya?! It’s just a recording! I’m not stopping you from making noise; just keep your voice down. Don’t drown *her* out.” I didn’t say anything. I just silently picked up the clothes he’d just ripped off me, sat up, and slowly started putting them back on. The moment the mask fell from my face, his tone softened. He reached out a hand, wanting to wipe away my tears. “Why are you crying? Did I hurt you just now?” I tilted my head, dodging his hand. My face was expressionless as I pointed to my heart. “Here. It hurts here.” He looked utterly confused, his brow furrowed. “It’s just a recording. Why are you getting jealous? It’s no different than watching an adult film, just adding to the mood.” I continued to dress with cold indifference, not giving him a single glance. Seeing my lack of response, he raised his voice a few notches. “If you really don’t want this, we won’t do it again in the future. I promise you, today is the last time.” I glanced at his already aroused lower half again, letting out a cold, bitter laugh. He instantly exploded. “What are you laughing at?! That’s incredibly disrespectful!” “Disrespectful? Have *you* shown me any respect?” I shot back. “You know whose voice that is in the recording.” His expression suddenly froze, but he stubbornly refused to admit it. “It’s just taken from some adult film.” He was silent for five seconds, then continued, “Fine. If you don’t want to be with me, I won’t force you.” The moans continued to play, grating on my nerves. I finished dressing and stood up, staring at him with a complex gaze. My voice trembled. “Chloe’s moans must really hit the spot for you, huh? You’ve been playing it on loop for over half an hour, can’t even bring yourself to turn it off.”
He started to panic, quickly standing up and towering over me with his six-foot-three frame. “You looked at my phone? Do you have any idea how out of line it is to snoop through someone else’s phone?! Where’s your upbringing?!” My heart tightened. He knew. He knew my mother had died in a car accident just a week ago. He’d been with me at the cremation. He’d watched me cry until I was oxygen-deprived and almost ended up in the hospital. He’d even offered to pay for my mother’s burial plot to comfort me. So why now, *why* was he twisting the knife in my fresh wound? I froze, tears welling up and blurring my vision. He realized he’d messed up. Guilt washed over his face, along with a complex expression I couldn’t quite decipher. He pulled two tissues from the nightstand and leaned in to wipe my tears. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I misspoke.” He paused, then added, “For the sake of me buying your mother’s burial plot, please forgive me!” I slapped his hand away, my body trembling as I stumbled out of the bedroom, slamming the door shut behind me. Through the closed door, I heard his feeble explanations. “Chloe and I are innocent! I haven’t had feelings for her in ages. I just thought her moans sounded good, that’s all!” I locked myself in the bathroom, leaning against the wall. My legs gave out, and I slid to the floor, collapsing in a heap. I buried my head in my knees, weeping silently. My chest ached, and my heart felt like it was being ripped apart… I needed a drink. I struggled to my feet, opened the bathroom door, and walked out. From the bedroom, I could hear his laughter, wave after wave, as he scrolled through TikTok. A primal scream tore from my throat. I burst into tears, flung open the apartment door, and walked out into the night. On the way to the bar, he called me five times. I ignored every single one. The noise inside the bar was deafening, yet it couldn’t drown out the sound of my shattering heart. One shot of liquor after another went down, offering a temporary numbing. But soon, the contents of my stomach began to churn violently. I’d never drunk so much before. Only now did I understand: drinking numbs the heartache because your stomach hurts more afterward. I let out a self-deprecating laugh and stumbled to the bathroom, throwing up until I was empty. As I turned around, I bumped right into Chloe. “Well, well, Anya. Don’t you ever come to bars?” She smirked, peering out past me into the bar. “Liam not with you?” Remembering that recording, pure hatred surged through me. Fueled by the alcohol, I slapped her across the face. “You’re insane?! What’s wrong with you?! Why’d you hit me?!” She clutched her stinging cheek. A wave of satisfaction washed over me, and I almost went for another slap. But in the next second, my legs suddenly gave out. I have a mild alcohol allergy, and I collapsed to the floor again. Chloe looked around. Seeing no one, she stepped on my hand with her high heel, twisting the heel into my knuckles. I screamed in pain. She then started slapping my face with both hands, hitting me again and again, spitting venomous words. “You bitch! You messed with me in college, and you’re still messing with me after graduation? What? Does it feel good to be betrayed by your boyfriend?” She kept hitting me. “When you seduced Noah back then, did you ever think you’d have a day like this?!” Noah was Chloe’s ex-boyfriend from college. She’d been madly in love with him. And it was because of him that she’d always rejected Liam’s four-year pursuit. Her face contorted in a grimace. The angrier she got, the harder she hit. Strangely, I couldn’t feel the pain on my face anymore. “If you hadn’t stirred up trouble, Noah would never have broken up with me! If we hadn’t broken up, I’d be a rich man’s wife right now! I wouldn’t be scrambling for jobs after graduation!” Chloe had always been high-maintenance in relationships. During their three months of dating, she’d broken up with Noah fifty-eight times, blocking his number every single time. I remembered it so clearly because Noah would always SnapChat me afterward, asking about Chloe and trying to get her back. He’d made me promise to keep it a secret. Until later, when Noah finally couldn’t take it anymore and broke up with Chloe for good. And that’s when the whole thing became public knowledge. I became Chloe’s scapegoat, the reason Noah had broken up with her. Seeing me remain silent, she kicked me squarely in the chest. The nausea in my stomach surged into my throat again. I tried to stand up to throw up in the toilet, but she pressed her foot down on my hand again, hard. The pain was so intense I couldn’t move. I couldn’t hold it in. I threw up all over the floor, some of it splashing onto the shoes of a girl who had just walked into the bathroom. Seeing someone enter, Chloe quickly released my hand and took a step back. I immediately reached out to wipe the girl’s shoes, my hand already stained with blood. Chloe gave me a disgusted look, covering her mouth and nose. Then, right in front of the other girl, her face completely changed. “Are you okay? How could you drink so much? Do you need me to take you home?” I wiped the residue from my mouth and spat at her. “Don’t pretend to be nice. You’re more disgusting than my vomit.” Chloe’s face crumpled in a show of hurt. “I was just trying to be kind. Why are you like this?” The other girl scoffed, then warned Chloe, “Stop acting like a good Samaritan.” She pointed at my face. “Those red handprints on her face? Weren’t those from you? Do you think I’m blind?”
I had never expected that reaction from a stranger. My heart, wounded by someone I knew, was suddenly warmed by a complete stranger. I looked up, studying her face. From this angle, she seemed to merge with the warm light of the bathroom, shining brightly. But I knew the consequences of crossing Chloe. I couldn’t drag this girl down with me. “Mind your own business! You’re blocking my light. Get lost!” The girl looked confused, but she just shook her head. After she was done, she glanced at me and walked out of the bathroom. Chloe slapped my face hard again. “Smart move. But that slap you gave me? We’re not done.” Then she made a call. “Hey, you three. Come over. I’ve got another gift for you.” After hanging up, she blocked the bathroom doorway and lit a cigarette. The smoke drifted in with the draft, making me cough uncontrollably. I suppressed my physical discomfort, stood up, grabbed cleaning supplies and paper towels, and cleaned up the vomit on the floor. As soon as I finished, Chloe grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and dragged me out. Just outside the bathroom door, three men were waiting, their faces leering. They were all under five-foot-seven, with eyes that were too small, each ugly in his own unique way. The stench coming from them was worse than a public restroom. One of them pulled a rag from his back pocket and violently shoved it into my mouth. The other two held me down. After gagging me, he turned to Chloe, joking, “This little thing, she’s got a big ass, and a D-cup, right? Way better than the last ones!” My heart dropped. Chloe did this often? She rolled her eyes at the man, her voice light and flirtatious. “Take her to my place. And you three, don’t be gentle with her. Have fun with her!” Her voice then dropped to a low whisper. “But don’t kill this one. There’s a good show to watch tonight!” “Alright!” “Tonight’s gonna be great! Haven’t played with one this good before!” “Yeah, I’ve been holding it in too.” The three men spoke excitedly, dragging me out of the bar. I was terrified and in pain, whimpering for help. But the bar music was too loud. No one would hear me. As soon as we were out the bar door, I was roughly thrown into the back seat of a car. Unbeknownst to me, I blacked out. The next time I woke up, I was in a strange room. Only those three men were with me. They were rubbing their hands together, naked. I screamed in terror. “Look who’s finally awake, you little vixen. It’s no fun if they’re dead.” “Are you gonna take it off yourself, or should we help you, huh? Hahahaha!” “Come to Big Bro’s arms, let me take good care of you!” I scrambled off the bed, my body trembling as I ran towards the door. I hadn’t even taken a few steps before they violently slammed me back onto the bed. “Damn it, you haven’t even entertained us yet! And you think you can just leave?!” I shrieked and screamed, pure terror seizing my heart. Suddenly, the door opened from the outside. The three men frantically pulled up their pants and rushed out. It was Chloe. And a furious Liam.
His face was thunderous. He pointed at me, yelling, “You didn’t answer your phone, and you ran off to mess around with three ugly losers like them?! You really are as disgusting as the rumors say.” After Chloe and Noah broke up, her hatred for me only intensified. She started spreading rumors that I was sleeping with two men. Soon, the gossip spread like wildfire. No matter how I explained myself or tried to stop it, people just found it amusing and spread it further. Eventually, I stopped trying to defend myself and just let it be. But I never imagined that rumor would become a scar in Liam’s mind. And today, he brought it up again. Seeing me silent, he sneered. “No answer means you admit it?” I was mentally and physically exhausted. I wearily looked up at him. “Open your eyes, Liam. This is Chloe’s place. She’s the one who brought those men here. I have no idea how I even got here.” Chloe’s expression instantly panicked. She quickly explained, “I saw you were drunk, so I kindly brought you to my place to rest. I even turned around and told Liam to come pick you up! But then you brought three men back to my house! I haven’t even settled scores with you, and you’re still trying to slander me?” Chloe was a master of turning the tables. I was too tired to explain. I just wanted to escape that room. I didn’t say anything. I just started walking towards the door. After just one step, Chloe blocked my way and shoved me hard in the chest. “You’re just going to leave without explaining things to your boyfriend? Looks like you don’t want this relationship to work out.” I looked up and met Liam’s eyes. They were cold, alien to me. My heart finally went completely numb. “Let’s break up, Liam.” Chloe burst into laughter, doubling over. “Did I hear that right? You want to break up with him? You’ve liked him since freshman year of high school, and you chased him desperately for four years in college.” She continued, “Your mom tried to stop you from being with him, but you pushed through all of it. You must have spent at least two hundred thousand on him, right? How could you possibly bear to break up?” I couldn’t bear it, but what I couldn’t bear to lose wasn’t him. It was the brave, loving person I used to be. Before my mother died, she told me: love yourself first, and never let the person you love hurt you. Mom was right. I shouldn’t have been with Liam. I should have listened to her. “Break up. I’m not joking. I’m serious.” I bit down hard, forcing the words out. Liam’s face turned green. He squeezed my arm hard. “You don’t have to threaten me with a breakup. You just want me to coax you, don’t you?” He paused, his voice turning accusatory. “But *you* did something wrong here. You went behind my back and found other men. You should apologize to me.” He lifted his chin arrogantly. “If you’re sincere, I’ll forgive you. Because nothing *actually* happened today.” I smiled bitterly, shaking my head. I pulled my arm from his grasp and said, word by word, “Don’t you understand, Liam? I said, we’re breaking up.” His face flushed a deep purplish-red, but then he laughed. And slowly, he uttered the words that would shatter me completely… “What are you, some kind of saint? I only got with you because you had a good body and I had fun. I absolutely despise pathetic lapdogs, and that’s *exactly* what you are!”
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